1947-09-17 — Page 2

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JEAN SULUVAN • LUCILE WATSON

Direct by Robul Walsh » screen May by Lusite. Yodney awkar Brand » from be Original Sváry log Jan May and Laudio Voley

Roy MILLAND

1. Introducing lovely Jean Sultivon 'as Molonne-the pit whỏ, knew, Jeand loved him most

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THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 17, 1947.

Every Wednesday in the Telegraph:

Sitting on the

THEN Belentista are not.

planning to dll us by

the million in a thou- sand horrible ways, they aro planning something even worse to keep us alive long after our ällöted span and long after we have reduced ourselves and those who once loved us to a condition of savage boredom.

with nature.

Fence

by NATHANIEL GUBBINS

·

or

STLOVE

According to one of the papers 1 read every day, 41 scientists have "banded together" for this joyous "gearching for a task. They are

of It means that this is the normal caught these trains, winter and means of extending the span

for the normal summer, sometimes sliivering on the human life to a hundred years and expectation of life

man, Including the incidence or platform, stamping your cold feet, beyond."

Why? Don't

wedged in a stuffy compartment me. a know accident, war and fatal disease. azk nothing of the motives of scientists.

on hot evening with no room to of

your

arms or turn the pages All I know

evening paper, your That's going on for another 100 years, Mr. Frumpington, moming and evening six days a week except sec. Six days for holidays. Let's a week for a year amounts to 312 days. Multiply that by 100 and you of it before the have 31:200 days great

upon you and mercy falls carries At

you off

office there are old fellows luce yourself who have been dragged out of retirement. But there are also young fellows, come young enough to be your grandsons.

It also means that many thousands is that they're never live to be 80 or 100 years. So, when

interfering happy unless they're

the scientists have increased tho hundred expectation of life to 190, here will About seven or eight

and gentlemen years ago the average expectation be many old ladies

30 years. Life of nearly 200 creeping around the of life was about

world and telling stories that were Jensi was violent but exciting-at for the privileged classes. It began funny in, say, 1309, early ind

usually ended carly, I hope that any old people who There was no time for boredom.

may be reading this will not jump At 18 a young man might have to the conclusion that I am sncerint fought a hundred battles, won the at old age. For one thing I am no hearts of a hundred damsels, spent longer vourig myself, and for not a hundred roystering nights stuffing I have always preferred the mellow himself with

and wine,

wisdom and tolerance of old people Before

became he

gouty ur to the ignorance and intolerance of rheumatic, or before his wife hated the young. the sound of his footsteps in the somebody cracked him on the hand finished him.

head

he

Or somebody murdared him in the night (homicide being a recognized custom ut the time), or he died quickly of some dircase caused by of sanitation, gluttony or the lacic absence of medical aid.

years.

All I ask old people is "Would you like to live another 100 years or more? If so, have you'considered what it means?"

At the office

ALI. right, old Mr. Frumpington, barring accidents, you are going to live another 190 years.

Juic

You

In fact, life was so short that no- body lived long enough to become

You are 80 now. Old Mrs. F. 18 a scientist. In this way, the world' was saved from the telephone, the 70. And she is also going to live radio,

the internal combustion another 100 years.

bomb and many Veeling nervous already? No? engine, the utum other horrors for many hundreds of O.K. Let us go on to the bitter end. Maybe you think you're going to live this extra 100 years in peace- reiirement watching the Billy handing out advice no- world go by, Later on, when murder became a body takes and telling people what punishable offence, when no mi

did in the Boer War? But you're not, Mr Frumpington. could kill another for an insult (or just because he didn't like his face) The scientists have seen to That. and get away with it; when doctors They're going to keep you dt, active terrible old skill and low- and useful, like that quired greater when

sonitation was invented

In med man

advertisements the prewar and food purified; when a man was for somebody's health nails. Which not even allowed to take his own means you've got to work. ilfe without paying a penalty if he survived the attempt, the expecta tion of life increased until it is now between 50 and 60 years.

For the benent of readers who also know nothing about, statistics, averages and other things that de light dull people, this does not mean that the majority of people die be, tween the ages of 60 and 60.

These young men are the execu- Lives now and old men like you are back where you began, at Die filing cabinets.

"Frumpington." "Sir?

"Ninety-five years ago you were told not to file 'cinema' under K.' Will you never learn?"

"Sorry, sir?"n

"Frumpington " **Sis?"

"In the last 81 years you have been late three times, It's not good enough, Frumpington."

"Sorru, sir.”

"Frumpington."

"Sir?"

"You'll have to wake up, Frum- pington, Slacknes cannot be toler. sted here. A man only 112 years old applied for your job yesterday.

At home

T home there will be old Mrs

She will also remember a dish you. ked 20 years ago, and you will still get it three times a week maybe for Another 10 years.

Every evening she will.shy expet- ly the same things she has been saying every evening for more than #century.

Every ovening she will be saying onctly the same thingza [for pos- Kibly another century.

There will alsó be macabre occa- sions when she remembers your nge- old romance and becomes

mental.

senti-

"Do you minember · our wedding day?"

"What, dear?"

"Our wedding day," "Well, it's a long time ago, dear, isn't it?"

dotail.

every

"I can remember Your father was very, drunk"

*Was lie, dear?"

"And I was sicht in the train." "Your father's cheap champagne, I expect, dear."

"Do you remember when Ronnie) Was born?" "Who?"

POCKET CARTOON by OSBERT LANCASTER

السمي

"Well, dear, they're either the fascinating remains of a picturesque abbey pulled down by Oliver Cromwell or the uninteresting ruins of a tasteless Victorian church

destroyed by a VI

BY THE

WAY

"Are you telling me you've for by Beachcomber

gotten the name of your chest sont-

"It's a long time ago, dear." "Ronnie weighed Dib. when he was born."

"Did

he, dear?"

I

HOPE the scheme by which

landladies will subtract

sum from the bill in return for the use of a guest's crockery is "He was the image of his grand-to be extended to hotels and to father. Do you remember?"

"It's a hundred years since I've acen Ronnie, dear, and nearly 150 since I saw your father."

foreign tourists;

If the French knew that they could have 3d. per day knocked off the bill by lending a saucer, they would come over here in droves. But what about the enterprising tourist who brings. heaps of crockery in his luggage, sup-

"A hundred and twenty-three years ago you said you loved me."plies an entire hotel, and ends up

"Did I, dear?"

"Do you still?"

"In a way, dear."

W

At the club

ELL, Mr Frumpington, how are

you doing? Want to quli?

with the management In his debt? An old friend

EV

VERY now and then my favourlio little miggiwiggy (with the ex- ception of the Gallup polls) pops up. I refer to Mass Observation.

who the

than

Every time it opens its mouth it Apart from the offer und the utters comething so astonishing that home, other things will have to one backs against the wall, helpless

This time It dis- be endured for another 100 years with mirth.

painstaking research, The club, for instance. And Christ-covered, by mas At the club those who have that the proportion of people

books is among after a means you've got to Woom, Mr. F., A Frumpington, now since on 150. not fallen under buges af er & club better-off and middle classes and get cracking. And take off still telling you to wipe your feet on body, maddened by their funny among the lowest income group of Carry me out in a basket! those old flannel bags and put on the mat. Still telling you what o

storics, will be living another 100 workers." the pin stripes and the black jacket, frightful state you left the tathroom years. So there will be little room Not even the Gallup turnip-mum- The 825 is still running and you In that morning, stil aniffing at for new members

blers have ever beaten that for sheer Addicmerce. know it's ten minutes walk to the your breath to satisfy herself that station even if you hurry,

you've hot been out with the chops, The actor who knew Sir Henry Perhaps you've almost forgotten still remembering things you said Irving and everything he said (and the 8.25 to town and the 6.45 back 120 years ago and catching you out probably didn't say Wall 2017 THE Hollywood dialect ja muuking. In the evening?; For 60 years you in a contradiction.

ing it over again. in And

rapid progress In this country on most days in all the years be-It is seeping through the walls of the

"JAN” EXAMINES THE 'BLIGHT OF COUNTRY GOSSIP'

The lonely Widow and the POW

to

our

it was caused by the branches of the trees beating the air and pushing it along. But that ex- plantation does not tally with all the facts: for I have noticed that the windiest place in the whole of Devon is Yennon Moor where no trees grow at all.

Then what drives it here year into Mrs Cottle's cottage of an even after year, blowing across the peat Ing. Nobody had seen him come bogs forever combing the wild flax out. Probably because nobody was wool, searing the stunted gorse and looking.

TONGUES TEASED TEETH coppering the hills with a shawl uf withered bracken?

DUT that

is of no consequence, rumour needs no evidence, nor alander Rubstantiation. Before fury had passed the breath was drawn in and the breath was blown

relentlessly

the beach.

1tween.

A lotta hooey

Commons, and any day now I hope The writer who had his

first to read: The Minister added that I manuscript rejected in 1001 (and, any of them wise guys on the Oppo- fortunately for the reading public,sition benches got fresh,

ho would

is still getting manuscripts rejected) tell them where they got off. Oppe- will still be telling you what this sition shouts of. "Aw, yeah? You and

buddies. stupid editor said about it and still who also?" "Me and my be quoting passages from it in 2001. answered the Minister. (Cries of Is his tacered, or is it?") The ador And on most days in ell the years Speaker then intervened to say that

between.

he would bust the place wide open

was pro

mad

a shame

killing For it's no use 17HAT causes the wind to Mrs Cottle was

that is dead, and Mrs Cottle was Somebody hinted that she should broken beyond further breaking. As for Christmas, Mr Frumping-it inere was any more of this hoocy. be hounded from us or thrown into

ton, I don't know what you're going Mme. Kodliva Oyui the duck pond. Without listening I

Everybody forgot the slander-to do about Christmas. he beard it all; one can no more

At your house there will be your A TRANSLATION of the Turkish obvious to the surf of gossip as it everybody except Mrs Cottle. After

dramatist's "Hilayol," frets against one's mind-than-turn-bearing her loneliness for the whole own children, all between 160 and woman the tide back..

of last winter she got up one morn-100; their children between 120 and made by Mr to Posture,

duced recently at the tiny Comfort It appeared that a young prisoner Ing before it was light, and wide 139; your greatgrandchildren, mostly Theatre in Bile Mews. The play is of-war who worked, on a neigh awake, but with a sleep walker's harians; your great-great- bouring farm had been seen going resolution, walked quickly down tondchildren. round about 70 and an attempt to convey to an imaginary

BU; some boisterous youngsters de- ghost the conflict between tween 40 and 50 who will also be Bardener and his deat employer, with a railway porter as interpreter. The our descendants, right down The tide was out. The wet rocks toddlers climbing on your knees and porter's daughter is in love with the just glistened in the annemle light. playing "Fingers

gardener. There is

19 110 dialogue, but Up Your

Nose" scrambled over

each character is heard thinking The poor woman

When, in your

look you

aloud. As the shingle. She fell and cut her round at your massed

think-gether, all descendants it is dim knee; she got up, indiferent to the and realise that at some time in the thoughts, hurt but straightening hor stacking past they have all played "Fingers unly an imaginary one, one asks why and in a few moments she stood on Up Your Nose with your nose, Mr anybody should worry about H. On sand where the waves were Frumpington-then I think you will the whole, it is a during experiment,

mas, but will pray for the

great where exactly the expertment lies, is did not turn but walked mercy to fall upon you.

Inot at all clear let it out again in a slow sigh of at poor Mrs Cobile's door, and it

knacked this way: He said that towards them; then, with a final satisfaction as rumour settles down she'd onld that I'd said that she'd gesture to convention, she undid to solid gossip.

scen-or so they sald that he'd said:

Heads nodded, blows

tongues teased

It can't be the trees. But now I know the reason.

It is plain that all winds, gales and breezes are caused by women, до they stand in pairs and draw

the

to disentangle and

the

Chosta

their breath in with Indignation at out and the wind got up and strode reaching where the surf was with- not look forward to another Christ-though what is daring about it, and

the first hint of any rumour, then across the moor to beat

Thus women are as bellows and that

why the wind across Yennon Moor. For

at

u

Its teeth and the whole village felt edge stands, or rather slopes, the little more virtuous by linding out old market town of Vaterworthy, another's fallings.

drawing.

She

her shoes and placed them neatly together. Then she walked on into the waves with her hands held high above her head.

THE MUSIC PLAYED

WE found her next evening wash-

Here, everybody prospers on every- In a few days Mrs Coille dared body else's business and nobody is not show her face' outside the gar- W. ed in with the incoming tide. I

safe from slander, not even the den gate; burled, much less the unborn.

the grocer who used to leave her provisions on the idtchen And as we carried her body into But

left them on the road. the cottage I saw the prisoner-of- country gossip Is cruel table now

standing by the gato. He thing: a spiteful blight worse thun The postman just shoved her letters war

the body any weed to uproot, more fertile through the door and never knock- followed us in. We luid

down. than a saw, and noisier than its cd to have a cup of tea or pass the

He went straight to a cupboard; unted Inrrow. Only last week poor time of day. Mrs Cottle was blown into her grave by the wind that rose in Yatterworthy gossip,

FORCE OF THE TIDE

And what made the persecution and, in a second, the room was full worse was that Mra Cottle had been of music. "Poor old dear," he said, the church organist, and, I suppose. "She was so fond of music. I-built the final blow was when she was her this wireless of an evening not usked to go on the church out- that's what

was doing here!" ing.

Then, before we could comment, he After that, the poor woman 'even went out through the back door IT happened this way.

Farmer Cottle died his wife stopped weeding her little gar which is not visible from the road, moved into a coitage and let the den. The prisoner-of-war ceased leaving the musle playing and us ali farm. Before the sed had punk on visiting the cottage, bad the wind, standing by the body of the woman her husband's grave rumour sug- subsided or shifted round to sear whom gossip lind gested and gossip, confirmed that somebody else's' privacy."

NANCY

When old

Let's Get Acquainted

UNCLE

FRED-.-

MISHMILLERA

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A PARAMOUNT PICTURE

NEXT CHANGE ONE DAY ONLY Gloria WARREN

Kay FRANCIS in

"ALWAYS IN MY HEART”

BEES

AREN'T

YOU AFRAID

OF THOSE

BEES?

grave.

OH, NO --- THEY

KNOW I'M THEIR FRIEND

blown into her

Σ

CROSSWORD PUZZLE

ACTOR

1: With ILE in a muddle you twist. (0) 8. Capo 20 inagg.) (8) 11. The teard of tropical America.

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By Ernie Bushmiller

WELL, SHAKE HANDS WITH ME SO THEY'LL KNOW I'M YOUR

FRIEND

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