1947-09-10 — Page 2

TO-DAY

ONLY

HIS SECRET MEANT DEATH

Today's meil dra-

Datis spy story -the serman's aik

Jima master place of cus

Bensal

AIR-CONDITIONED

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 1947.

At 230, 5.15.Every Wednesday in the Telegraph:

7.20 & 9.30 p.m.

DEATH 7 One Man

If He Didn't Talki To Countless Thousands

* If He Did!

MILLAND

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MARJORIE REYNOLDS

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GERAHÉES SAMA RONEPL RAFFERTY STANTON “Iraq PORIST ·A NOVI ANDTRtor "RAJI BALKANDANAO MAZURNI

AM

M-G-M

PICTURE

Sitting

FTER the Marshall plan

the Gubbins plan.

The Gubbins plan is 80 simple that it's a wonder no- body thought of it before,

In a sentence, the Gubbins plan for the recovery of Europe in to release all the lunatics in the asylums and let them run the world.

selves.

on the

Fence

by NATHANIEL

GUBBINS

Its

It would also contribute greatly to my happiness and comfort while allowing you the maximum of selt Indulgence.

But I do beg of you not to be- come too confident of your powers ant stick spears into mo.

I remain, Sir,

faithfully.

Your Sionachi.

Diary of a worm

EPRESSED worm nrrives home

After all, supposedly sanc

DEPRESSED (Woks to income-tax men have been running it up to

The all-embracing Gubbing pinn may I draw your attention to the deductions from weekly wage sea- now, and look what's happened.

would also form a Housewives' stoicism of a very gallant stomach side holldry will have to be reduced

named from two weeks to one. For instance. there is prob-gue of certifed lunatics instead belonging to a Dutchman

Oh, so this is worra's latest mave ably no saner man in existence of the other kind. These mad old Mirin Dajo?

believe them- than Ernie Bevin. Indies would each today

According to Time magazine, this in campaign to ruin wife's health. his selves to be the Minister of Food stomach has been pierced several is it? Examine

of ane any

hechuse speeches and in every sentence and distribute food only to them times with a spear

owner wishes to prove the power of you will find that

Long before they had eaten them- mind over matter and his stomach's

the rest of the Invulnerability to pain or injury, sense which is so uncommon.

selves to death

who There is a photograph of this Yet where, up to now, has he population, including those

produced

food or brought it here, poor, perforated stomach, which I got with Russian intellectuals, would be starved to death, and that will not show you this morning os who are so clever that they would be the end of that problem. you don't feel very well.

Perhaps

Your considered views the maddest people of can't see they will end up the same way as Hitler and Goering all under the Gubbins plan would mailer would be appreciated,

Yours sincerely, If they don't watch out?

•

common

Under the Gubbins plan, a lunatle who thought he was the Czar of Russin would represent us in Parla. Every time Molotov said "No" this lunatic would crack him on the head

with the butt end of a her

If he rose to protest, lunatic, who believed himself to be Karl Marx, would hit him on the head

again in case he said "Yes." If he came up for the third time, an American lunatic, who bellered himself to be Colonel McCormick. would kick him in the pants being a Russian anyway,

for

the

This would be the end of Molo-

maybe toy's political career; end of his life if he didn't get out of Faris quickly.

Russla would never go to war because by this time About it, American lunatics would have gain- ed control of the atomic bombs (if and the they haven't already) Russians would have nothing to do but retreat behind the iron curtain,

and leave dig deep shelters,

in peace.

15

be the mud Bloodsuckers or income tax collectors.

of the

Led by a mad Chancellor Exchequer they would tax every- body 19s. 11d. In the L so that Dear Sir,- nobody would do anything

this

N. Gubbins.

at all In reply to your undated letter, and the Chancellor would be left I have to inform you that I doubt in the it the "poor perforated atomach" with most of the money country and nothing to buy with it, you menilon could possibly feel That would be the end of income worse than I do at this moment. tax, because it would be the end of incomes and probably the end of the mad Chancellor and his mad Blood- suckers, too.

all

Oh, and the housing problem. Mad builder, directed by mad

houses architects, would build

for mud town the country over

to knock down again. planners

The result would depend on wh cild work the faster.

רן

Not content with keeping witei chained to pig sty at Christmas try ing to make Christmas dinner out chicken and two of one alcinny ounces of bacon while gas manager and his wife went to cat heads off in Switzerland; not content with taking wife for miserable motor- coach ride nt Enster white gus manager and his wife went in

to Cornish Riviera, Limousine to

WOTITI

is now going to take worn-out wife for week to cheap board

boarding-house at Margate while gas manager takes his wife for month to super hotel at Bournemouth with dwarf page boys in white jackets, ladies band, lifts to all floors and porter in scarlet and gold.

Indeed, if it is invulnerable to

pect worm to afford month a; super pain or injury, must feel a great. Naturally, wife would hardly ex- deal better.

hotel on worm's paltry pittance.

A

wrong

wines

POCKET CARTOON

"They'd look smashing on a furnace worker in an iron and steel foundry....

BY THE

WAY

by Beachcomber

INTERVIEWED yesterday, Mr

Justice Cocklocarrot said: There is nothing in English law (unless another Bill has been passed while I am speak- ing) to injunct a citizen from pushing a pen up a mountain with his nose, provided that he is not causing a disturbance by so doing, and that he does not of way. Even if he trespassed. the onus would be on the plain- infringe a no-right or no-rights

MIE exquisite Slopcorner girl, In her official capacity of Miss using Problem, infd the first and

As the owner of this stomach is

Nor would she expect worm to be till to prove that damage or probably a religious fanatle, he in

atan

man. at ease in super hotel, giving wrong damages had been done by probably

a temperate

and either the nose or the pea, or stomach, though tips, ordering

conjunction Therefore his pierced with spears, is not obliged becoming laughing stock of waiters.both working in in deal with pink gins coming down

But if worm had not squandered for a purpose or purposes un. when it is empty.

pittance on cadging worm disclosed." paltry In fact, froh a medical point of friends in low taverns wife might at |

nt Mimsic Slopcorner view, it would be interesting to lenst have expected two weeks

Margale boarding-house If the mad town planners won.

the cominon A stomach does

with fish and chips high tea instead proper dinner in proper hotel there would be no houses left. If know which

and architects treater permanent injury, half the mad builders

last brick of a house which was to with proper man like gas manager won they would end up by building dozen pink gins before lunch or a of for themselves slab from a spear.

to order it in manner born,

have been built next year. She a new mad-house

in. and locking themselves

Now this matter has been raised,

astonishes wife What

Is that was presented with a bouquet of This would be mistaken for

income-tax collectors bother to take tulips by the mayor's wife, while enemy strong point by a mad army may 1 offer a suggestion?

the brick Commanded by n med general and If a man can se dominate his body anything front worm's pitiful pay-oficials went in search of the brick

Owing to beltleneck, the blown to pieces by heavy artillery. by will power that be cannot feel pacitet.

when

brickfield And that, children, would be the pain and suffers no injury

In ma of the American The problem

down specially Although worm is always talking was only half made, and had to be solution of the housing his stomach is perforated, would it laan could be settled in the same Gubbins

unatics problem.

not be possible to become invulner- about burden of taxes (as though two hundred miles away. As it was still soft, the mayor helped way. If you replaced the

he were buying battleship for able to hangovers by the same

tion) to wife it seems rather like Mimsie to lay it, and there was from America's nut-houses, these Letter to a stomach method?

taking money from child's money-hearty laughter. An official of the same people woukl.

Uch could Achieve If

Ministry then announced that owing comparatively burn all the dollars in the country.

miracle, I think it would prove to My Dear Stomach.--

It had been This would not only solve Europe's

schedule, ΜΥΡ

according business proposition.

If worm were like cos manager, to the regional zoning of priorities view of your complaints be a sound

sixpenny paying surtax and still able to buy decided not to proceed with the problems, but the problem of how

write a could callous treatment you You American big business is going to about the

have received recently while mak- pamphlet describing your methods new curtains and take wife to super deci millions of dollars, worth of sell

advice which would hotel, worm might have something house. Mimsle's mother sald:

always say women can help with new and giving the who

ing

acquaintance of goods

to talk about. stomachs in our new home town, probably sell by the million.

If worn

had responsibilities of the housing problem." Her father dollars,

gas manager, who not only manages said: "They couldn't have got on

and without her." gas, but is head of Rotarians

evenings wriling witly

In Wall-street with certifled lunatics

FR

10

people

have

no

you

FRANCO IS SUPPORTED

BY THE "BIG THREE”

RANCO stays on top be- cause he has the Army behind him.

Second of three articles on Nation- ⚫alist Spain today by

FRANK BREESE, United Press Staff Correspondent

have not been made public, Nor the size of the combined police force, which is said to total as high is 150,000.

box.

sches

"

for local Conservative What on earth Association, Instead of spending them listening to smutty stories told by witty worm friends, worm might have some cause to look worried.

As

Worm

tho

THE

Ministry of Health announce ment that more and more red-

arc using women haired rallways is one obvious sign of Fred Improved conditions. Mr Kickstall, A steam-overseer,

mit

But

But

it is, worm is worried, not "It is due to an increased because of responsibilities which of health-giving diet per unit." gas manager takes In his stride, but Mrs Tender added shrewdly: "There because sex-mad

is living are too many excuses made by non- beyond wretched income, lavishing users of the rallways, who confusa call money on blonde- barmaids and be-a-balanced diet with what they

multi-million- part-time nourishment."

Glossop, on the other hand, con- The combination not only pre having as if he were

alre. dis- vents internal uprisings and

When wife's health finally breaks gratulated the red-haired women on orders. but successfully

kreps

the excellent job they were doing. down through working fingers potential opposition groups frombone and no proper holidays worm

Dozens organising and spreading.

won

to

to

Only a suggestion

Dr

the special week when his wife had tonsillie HERE is talk of moving the

Franco's regime has the no- minal support of Spain's "Big Three" the Church, Capital and the Army. The most im-

Deven, be able to send her

home (like gas portant backing is that of the

of organisational attempts by all and Army, both pro-Franco

factions from left to right have proper nursing

manager, who paid thirty guineas a

Church of St. James Garlic- anti-Franco Spaniards have

been frustrate: by

and 100 guineas to specialist) but hithe sixty feet in order to widen stated.

security details. If that support were withdrawn, Franco would be a

Church stipport stems from grati-will have to send her to public hos-Thames-street. If that can be done, helpless individual, Therefore, pressed the ballef that it consists of Franco's far-reaching influence approximately half a million men. tude to Franco for having eliminat-pital like charwoman with duodenal why not move St. Paul's out of tho ed a regime whose uncontrollable ulcers and wife will never be able way of Beauty of Bankside, the Millitary service is compulsory.

to hold head up In Werms-avenue loveliest power-station ever seen on excesses committed extremists

again. quar- over Spain's armed forces is one

The lot of the senior officers is against the Church. Informed of-the-biggest factors in his

agrecable, since they are eligible for lers say that the Franco regime.

more Aenevolent and success formula,

certain commissary and other pri- has been

to the Church than any vileges which are not available to generous Franco has enjoyed the reputation civilians. The commissary privileges other in the past half century. In of an able military leader, Key po extend to the ranks. Moreover, the return, the Church has been loyal sitions in the Ariny se held by men oficers are said to be bound up in

posts Occupied important

who

in Franco's Nationalist Army dur- tradition which keeps them out of

the Civil War. Those who have active politics,

For

Jess ardent or who have ex-

4

to Franco for the most part.

Some elements within the Church

have favoured a government change.

In addition to the Army support, The Cardinal of Toledo, primate of

in Capital. Their chief complaint is that the system is more detrimen-

d opposition to Franco's terre Franco relics on a highly centralised Spoln, suggested by Implication in

to secondary have been relegated

police system to preserve internal ur- a pastoral letter Issued after war Jobs or retired. The key jobs are der. Vigilance is shared among three that political evolution was in or- The Cardinal of Seville has held by men whose loyalty is un-

branches the armed police, the civil der.

favours o that he, 100, The indiented guards and the secret police. questionable,"

armed police function primarily in change from the present system. instance,

Agustin the cities. General

elvii guardsmen The

The most outspoken crities in the Munoz Grandes, torumander of the operate in the country and along the Blue Division that fought against frontiers. The secret police are ever ranks of the "Big Three" are found Russia on the Eastern Front, is com- present. mander of the Madrid military dis- trict. Informed

Just under 50 percent of Spain's tal than bencfcial to the economic Franco has complete confidence in 14 billon peseta budget (44 pesetas situation. A large majority of the Munoz Grandes, knowing that he can to the pound sterling) goes to the

capitalists supported France during leave Madrid without worrying about three Ministries xf the armed forces, the Civil War. Despite their com any attempts against the government and the Ministry of Interior which 'plaints they, too, have expressed

has supervision over the pollee. their sympathy for Franco in pre The exact size of the Spanish The Ministry of Interior has other ference to u repeat-civil-war risk.

(Third and Concluding, Army has not been published. For expenses besides those of policing

article tomorrow). elin military observera. havd ex- the country, but the exact figures

quarters say

that

white hìa brick is turned.

NANCY She Asked for It

THAT MOUSE*

HOLE IS SO UNSIGHTLY.

DON'T BE SÓ LAZY:

GET UP AND FIX THAT MOUŠE

HOLE

OKAY-- IT'S

FIXED.

он,

AWRIGHT

17

10

1

་

paper?

CROSSWORD

#7

P

#5

Across 1. Looks as though Diana la with

out fauit. (0)

10. Infringement.

to attach 17

18. Rate us at a good soaking. (8) 21. Where you may asa a red rosa in

churen? (7)

22. Daisy's bridal conveyanco. (0) 23. An ivy-bush. (3)

Down

1. A small ornamental writing-desk,

101

2. What you may got on making

contact (0)

3. Day.

(5)

4. Uttored. (0) 5. Broken pote. (4)

7. Diana's attitude. (7)

B. Dason. (4)

11.

0. Juice. (3) ·

14. May be eaten inay pa drunk, but

nayway enjoyable. (D)

10. Bhows quito a number to the

Plant. 10

17. Mountain lake, (4)

10. A letter from Rome. (3) 20. Also.

(3)

Bolution of yesterday's puzzle,

and 3 Powi. Parement counter 50, Outpeat; 11. Dia: 14, Caldo: 17, Relay #1, ALIE

To Bankespeare is meant rain wel granges

tain. (0)..

1. Extends (3) Kuncer) 4; Testif

Just a little detective. 10)

Coup; H, Cucur P.; Cor: 12.

16. in potato you get a draught. (B) 1) 16, 11, 16. Drowi 20.

By Ernie Bushmiller

-IENIE BUSHMILLERA

When You Feel Tired

and Restless

Ask For

ELLIOTTS TONIC

On Sale at All Dispongarios