1947-04-23 — Page 2

* KINGS★

FINAL SHOWINGS

TO-DAY

AT 2:30, 5.00, 7.20 & 9.40 P.M.

FRANK SINATRA

KATHRYN GRAYSON,

GENE KELLY

fin

ANCHORS AWEIGH

in TECHNICOLOR

Her highcon

Tout her shyraena Land the

'bellboy lost his job...

TO-DAY

TO-MORROW

with JOSE ITURBI

AN M-G-M PICTURE

COMING SOON

M-G-M

PICTURE

HEDY ROBERT JUNE LAMARR WALKER ALLYSON "Her Highness and the Bellboy

* CARL

A Royal Command to Love

AGNES

"RAGS"

ESMOND - MOOREHEAD""RAGLAND____

QUEEN'S

At 2.30, 5.15,

7.15 & 9.15 p.m.

ONE KISS TAUGHT THEM TO LOVE AND TO KILLI

DAYS OF GLORY

He teaches

her to hate

and kill... she teaches him to lovel

A CASET KOKINSON praduction Introducing

& C of New Parzenalines

Starring TAMARA

TOUMANOVA GREGORY PECK

with

ALAN RIES MARIA PALMER LOWELL GINGIT

CENTRAL & ALHAMBRA

QALLY AT 2** 515 75 89 PM.

CENTRAL:

DAILY AT 2** 58o 7808920PHÍ

Extra Performance at 12.30 P.M.

SHOWING TO-DAY

STRANGE NEW TERP

s the

Creeping from its lamb of hate... stolking a trail

of vengeance!

LON CHANEY

MYS

CORS

PETER COE KAY HARDING MARTIN KOSLECK VIRGINIA CHRISTINE KURT MATCH

ORIENTAL

SHOWING TO-DAY: 2.30—5.20-7.20~9.20.P.M. M-G-M'S MILD-WESTS THRILLER! INDIAN FICHTS! COVERED WAGONS!' HIDDEN COLD! 1,000 THRILLS!

M-G-M'S BIG SHOW! WALLACE

MARGARET

BEERY O'BRIEN BAD BASCOMB

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, WEDNESDAY, APRIL 23, 1947.

Every Wednesday in the Telegraph':

W

Sitting

HEN the power was cut off and the electric heater went dead N. Gubbins, Esq., grabbed a pencil,

a few sheets of paper and a ten tray and leaped back into bed.

Whenever he writes in bed he always uses the back of a ten tray, which is better for the purpose than anything you will get when the export drive is off.

on the

Fence

by NATHANIEL GUBBINS

mt."

Then he gathered cigarettes

nearer to him, lying there In the wit hours. We are proud of Nor- and newspapers round him, and darkness of the night wondering if he first thing he saw after read- his socks are properly munded, it ing about the Test match was his mother can cool, if he is cold, the suggestion that Dr Jonde likes hot bottles in his bed, it he is lonely, if he has her sense of humour, and, oh, all sorts of tender. girlish things,

may woman.

be reincarnated

#LY 24

So he didn't have to read Here was a column any more. handed to him on a plate, as you might seny:

If N. Gubbins, Esq. is reincar- nated as a female what sort of girl do you think he will be in, say, 19077 According to his present form, he may be a rather plain girl given to Introspection and worrying, and de- voted to daddy because other an is devoted to him. Or, rather, her.

man

no

Or he may be 'n clever girl who passes all exams bu; is by-passed by love,

What he thinks he would like to be is a glamorous blonde, the des troyer of eligible young men of good families and the despair of elderly, misunderstood club mên.

In other words, wolf bait.

Plain girl

{1

ET'See what happens to N, Gub-

bins, Esq., reincarnated 15 plah girl.

Ivy Smith (ex-Gubbins) is sitting in the little parlour opposite her Ivy is father. who is a widower, thinking of Ronnie, the handsome

collector. Income-tax

who young

lives next door.

Ivy is always thinking of Ronnie. She peeps behind the curtains to see him stride off in the morning to his office. where he will compose party letters to defaulting taxpayers.

She listens for his step in the arm determined evening and the shulting of his gate. The walls of the seini-detached villa thin, and she can hear his deco voic

at his mother, who is

She can even

oldout ite

She doesn't have to wonder if he loves her. She shows he doesn't, She has seen his cold, ficlal eye stare straight through her pitiful Hle hats worn to charm him, or Kiure with distaste at the clowni make-up on her clownish face,

This particular night she has heard Ronnie's mother :lear away the supper (she could almost hear him eating it) and the knows he wil soon be going to bed. So she must go, too. This is the only thrill of the day in her mock romance,

"Will you have your hot milk now, father?" she aske.

Her father, a silly old man, looks puzzle he up from the crossword has failed to solve all the evening,

"My Joy" he says, beaming at

o without her "What shall ivy when she marrics, eh?"

hot "Will you have your

milk now or not, father" she asks again, an ex-Gubbins tartness in her voice. "Ah," says the actless old food, "you can't deceive your daddy. He Inous Mr Right's coming alang one

What a

day. He knows Mr Right's not far away this very minute. lucky man he'll be to get my lue."

At this the

leimperamental ex- Gubbins stamps her foot and tours: disfigure her plain face.

"Why, what have I done?" asks the old fool, "What have I said to pact my darling fue?"

"If you had to give me a silly name like Ivy you might at least call me Ivy and not Ive. It's too much, too much, too much," screams the ex-Gubbins, flouncing out of room and banging the door.

Clever girl

They may be proud of her, but they She Is not plain and shy hate her,, Ikke ex-Gubbins: No. 1. She is ugly with the ugliness of pride and arro- sunce,

She can be a lawyer or doctor, a magistrate or a higit-up in the Civil Service-nnything sae likes. She has passed all he exoma,

But all this hideous, objectionable Kirl wants is a husband and a home of her own. Her wenry parents arc in favour of it, too.

It is hard for Norma to find a bus Lund. It is hard for her to find n man who will say Happy Christmas" to her and menn 1.

She nearly lands one le Ash, a middle-aged bachelor, who is happy I she dangles the ball, He escapes by emigration.

Then, one day, on holiday in the country, she finds some simple, sweating him in the fielde and drags him, muttering, to the altar.

The background noises of her fo or the yelplug of young wolves lleking their wounds and the noan- ing of old wolves, inoxtally hurt and creeping away to die in club arm- choirs.

But what in 'whe to do? It sho ignores them they are hurt. If she smiles them they are hurt, -be- cruse she smiles at all.

Being a kind-hearted girl, she al- lows them to take her to dinner in turn, Istening sympathetically to the outpourings of their hearts and drinking them under the table,

"You are all I ever wanteil in life," the grizzled old wolves whisper In their cups. They all say this. She in used to it.

"If only I were younger," "they shy.

As if that would make any

difference.

But she only laughs beautifully, Anishes off the champagne daintily and goes home in a separate cab.

She is untouched by emotion the Awful Young Man comes along. He is so awful that men turn away from him when introduced. When he enters a good notel porters run to ask him what he wants, him after and usually turn him out to be on

safe side.

the

He wears purple striped suits and suede shoes and goes in for football pools, (Yes, they still have football

He borrows all her money, pawns her jewels, insults ner when drunic and mocks her when sober.

ment she still loves nim, but marries He he goes to prison for embezzle-

a hearty industrialst, who thinks puns are funny, and has three ugly children, all like the hearty indus trialist.

He has no brains. She has enough for both. She will develop his mind. She takes him through mathem: ties, males him read good books, If N. Cubbins, Esq., is born again listen to good music. He can sing as a female the thinks he would like better songs in The Woggon and to be a black woman In the real jungle, where tigers are the chilef danger; or a girl in Lapland, where wolves have four legs minds.

Horses but 18e won't let him.

He loses weight and is given to cursing under his breath. Everybody says he's far mazed and properly, pixilated.

surprised Therefore, nobody is when ex-Gubbins No. 2 is found strangled beside the radio with the Third Programme blaring,

Yes, the Third Programme is still going in 1997.

Glamour girl

X-CUBBINS No. 3 is blonde and

the Excup, Mearts miss u bent when the smiles. Her wit is quoted all over town and stolen by the radio comedians.

JORMA, ex-Cubbing No. 2, is s

clever that even her parents re- call from her.

ear his rumbling Sear "Good-night, mum." and his arm. NOB happy footstep going upstairs to bed, to the room that is only separated from hers by lne-inch will.

She remembers how she changed her bedroom so that she could be

When

10

At school and college it is always Norina the same, "First prize Forma gets first prize. Norma passes

and clean

NEWSREEL

GRAHAM.

"Now isn't that strange, girls 7-throa pairs left."

"No brandwa'ee expari menting with lightar-fusf."

INDIATM

LATEST $TEST SCORT

** thought it was Australia wo were playing.”

"No doubt Mr. Shinwall will refund Your money

application,

BY THE WAY

by Beachcomber

are

what you

Colonel, sold the

HE night was moonless, and

don't know THE

there was a thick white talking about," mist. At about 2 a.m. Colonel "and I doubt whether you do. May that I realised what had happened. Cruddock-Mildew started to

I ask what you are up to?" Wolf packs gather round her walk home from an evening of

"We have come from the earth," said the old man, in a voice quiver- wherever she is, begging for favours | bridge. and snarling at each other,

ile was feeling his way slowly ing with emotion. "We have but As she is as good as she is beauti-alung the promenade when he heard now landed on the moun. This ful, which is usually the case, the is not quite happy bout the wolves.

the flood came

to our town

By GWYN LEWIS

SOUNDINGS by the crew of the Army "duck" corning

to the rescue of the people in our flooded road showed

a depth of 4ft. Gin., with about 3ft. of water in the draw- ing rooms. The major in charge asked, bottom like in this road? Army type, do not like mud.

"What is the Soft ground or hard ?" "Ducks,"

The need for evacuation arrived while we City men were at desks.

There were delays caused by am-

vehicles being phiblous

bogged. These were towed back into cunt: Voy.....

is

voices on the beach to his right. the moon, 1 presume, and not some Someone said: "Here is dry land. other planet. It is the moon, isn't We must have landed on the very it?" edge of a canal." "Or" said some- one else, "an ancient crater Alled with water.

Puzzled, the Colonel stopped and peered into the darkness and mist. Presently a dim figure was visible, which at once. hailed him. The Colonel made no reply. The que figure grew more distinct. An

Detours were made in response to urgent messages passed from ofc flooded house to the next and 80 "Dumn if, sir!" sald the Colonel,

on until they reached the convoy.

The rescued told us of the terrible sense of desalntion they experienced os from their bedrooms they watch- ed hour after hour over the watery

wastes for signs of "a sall."

When swans swam over garden fences to cruise round the lawns An Army officer said in the best

women threw them brend to keep 60. them thert.. One woman sald our Montgomery tradition: "Quito but this operation will go

the ine: "It was wonderful how strictly as planned."

swans helped to relieve our loneli- ness."

We come home to find ourselves cut off from our homes by two milea at water.

And so i was. The voyage memorable.

to

through

road our

was

to

We distributedɖ bread and milk, a policeman on board taking a house- to-house census to decide what coch house should have

FENCES SAGGED

Daylight saw a company of an-

We saw a punt paddled neatly χίους "somethings in the City" standing at the water's edge, their through the front door and into the

parlour of Chez Nous. umbrellas neatly rolled, cager but

Bill Knipe, a farm bailiff, swore singularly ill-equipped to go to the

to load four pigs into D 1 he tried rescue of our, women and children.

it. capsizing punt,

Then at last, as dusk' came Some of us wore apals when the

We were sorcastle when a pretty the dreary scene and with propel- occasion called

for gumboots

young thing halled us from her up- ler threshing at full speed, our breasted the waves of our stairs refuge with the statement that "duck" she had a train to catch and would road. we please be back immediately.

waders.

and

We quickly found that these things were unobtainable.

operation.

evacuated.

He dealt just as firmly with

J

over

Our garden fences sagged under Our town council in typical

The major in charge of our the impact of our wash, but it did British fashion began in a glorious "auck Informed her curtly that not seem to matter. muddle, but by the middle of the there were marooned families who

chlidren We saw our wives and week had an excellent service et had

and carried out of our been days without food,

the homes on craft and amphiblous vehicles in that there were sick people to be shoulders of the crew.

Husbands cut rather sorry figures AS PLANNED

as "gallant rescuers," but were hail- It took on that first day of the de- family of foreign extraction who ed as deliverers, though later up- luge many hours of bullying, coax- called out, "We will ovacuate to braided for having gone to offices ing, and pleading to secure rescue morrow. Please be here promptly in the hour of peril. craft.

at 10 in the morning."

1 noted as our pets, dogs, cats and We spoke to the borough sur- Slowly but emciently our "duck" canaries were being brought out veyor, the superintendent of police, and others behind it picked up the that the 'doga instinctively began

the the mayor, the Army officers, and to marooned from collage and bunga- swimming in

arms of the nnybody who would listen, of alling low and from the riverside manslöns soldiers, 'wives, oged grandmothers and fret of the rich.

Now we await the aftermath of ful children who must be evacuated Some had to wait until ladders, the delugedank smelling forthwith.

could be found as they were in in- ruined carpels, and gardens that We sald our larders were empty, accessible rooms.

.will be 'quagmires.

NANCY

Always Good for a Laugh

HA--HAW-- HA--

HO--HO--HA-*|

·HA--HA --HA-- HO- HAW--HQ--HO

I WONDER

WHAT'S 50 HUMOROUS

IN THERE

SAY!--- IS THERE |SOMETHING FUNNY

ON THE RADIO?

ERNIE BUSHMILLĽM

rooms,.

a tiny felt hat, and with a sweeping beard approached cautiously, The Colonel

grew equally cautious."- know not," said the old man, what tongue to address you.'

"Isn't English good enough?" The hideous truth

600D heavens!" said the old G mm. Do the moon-falls speak

English?"

"The what folk" thundered the Culonel.

"This is incredible," said the old man, "Surdy nobody has anticipated us. Surely we are the arst."

Rupert & the New Pal-36

مار

When George la comfortably settled In the hamper Rupert and Bill decide that it is too soon to go home and that they may as well go on fooking for buttercups, as those stem to be the tortoise's favourite food. In another meadow they spy their friend Old Willum, and diey trot across to him. "Please, can you tell us where to find buttercups? they ask. The old man is hard of beating, but he appears to under. Hand." Buttercup?" he wheezer. Ay-in the second field beyond that gale.

*CAL RIGHTS RESERVED.

By Ernie Bushmiller

YES!

MAGARRAFA

000

"No," said the Colonel gently, as a child or A though humouring hymic. "No. Worthing."

CROSSWORD

Actos

1. lo's the one to straighten out

the 104 coll. (0)

One of the USA. (4)

4. Land of the pure, tal

Following the car they may mako opers. (3)

11. They are not exclusiva to tho

Parkom. (b)

12. In this the dining place of the

old Bearded

gentleman with keythe and hourglass? (4+5) 14. Society formed to overthrow English rols in Ireland. (6)

17. The devil it in (0)

18. Initially servant of the sick. (3)

10. 8pared "y" Adam. (a)

20. tussian decrow having the force

of law. (3)

The curve in parchment, 131

Permit (51

11. Ben 1 Down.

25. To a little credit, what a bag. (3)

*

Down

P

1 and 28. (toe stub baubien (anag.).

Elan electrical stepificance, 13).

Another electrical term. (3)

4. Never ending, (9).

5. Bplit roe 18)

d. Town of India, 18)

10. It makes mo cita, (8)

1. Impossible for the nudist. (8) 14. Fried to put black

America (4

aut

15 Wealthy man who seems to bo

without a shilling; (5)

10 Grandma dover allowed it to

Murter exposura (5)

18. Nimbus, (4) 31. animal coming and going.. (3) !

Botulion of yesterday's puzzle.--Acrossi 2. Doar sustO ZAVORE IN, Alp: 11. 8pm: 12, Otar: 13, Todi, Fl, Louvre,” ka Unhereite: 10. Lip: 18 Sirala. Ate: 20. Bippa: 23. Tear, 21. RAM: 25 26. in Dawn: 2 Pottuisig; V, Depo Bereen Unlees; *

Cupira; 17, l'eari A1, Trut Ra, Ian,

When You Feel Tired

and Restless

take

Elliotts Nerve

and w

Brain Tonic

On Sale at All: Dispensaries: