1947-03-01 — Page 10

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TO

BY THE WAY

By Beachcomber

FROM the Indy with the cold Charlie Suct was passed to one of thoxe exasperating middle-aged bureaucrats wito affect a hearty good will to cover the emptiness of their minds.

"Mr Chilvey will ree you," amold a keerelary, and Suet found himself fresh-complexioned, confronting

A

thin fair hair Brushed back from a brous, unlined foreheal. "Ha!" said Mr Chilvey. Yea! He seemed to "Well, nowf expect an answer, so Suct countered with "Good mording," "Yes," sald

atoutich man, with

You

Mr Chilvey. "Now, let's see. want to see me about the what-is-it -carpet export, Jin't 1179"

Faid

Suet, "foghorn

NO

*

containers." "What?" bald Mr Chilvey. "Foghorn containers,

repeated Suet. course, of enurse," cald Mr Chit- vey, "Well, now, where were we? Yes,

Of course. Well, Lef What sort of fugthorns?" "Containers for all sorts," said Suet. "Ali, kald Mr Chilvey, beaming. "Quite com- prehensive, th? Well, now," Nothing much happens

HAVE the sketches here," said

Suct, placing a large selection on the desk. Mr Chillvey contemplated thren upside down, "Músta't mix 'em

up with the town-planning stuff, eh?" he said, and laughed loudly. "Once knew a feller who had his own portable foghorn for use in the trenda. A bit disconcerting. Now the sketches. You

vik want Halliday to lock

them. understands all this, eh? 19 Het Miss Upchurch, to contact him."

Ch

aledon on the telephone

"Halliday's away in wall," said Mr Chilvey

A

rn-

Corn- "Would Butcher do "Oh, anybody," said

Suct.

Yes

Butcher's

Suet

"In! leave. I forgot. Better call back. Or we'll write to you, thị” picked up his skeleles and departed, but not witmut having first fald his finger lang his upper lip and breathed down his nose.

By the skin of our teeth

66

'D'

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, SATURDAY, MARCH 1, 1947.

THE PARKERS

by HODGES

STOPPED NIGAM CH. DONT WORRY mit

PIL SCOM FIK ST.

ANYTHING MECHANICAL –TIVITÀ ME:

YOU FORGAY MY WAR EXTERICACE

«ASİ #MOTDA Mechania's

War by-passed these

long bearded Japs

EMOCRACY," observed old Inosuke Miyamoto, patriarch and headman of the Hairy Ainus of Hokkaido. "is no doubt a very good thing. But me-1 like to hunt bears." He stroked his foot-long gray beard reflectively and Brushed Unck ht 10-inch moustaches with 771 elaborate curved wooden Youstache-ifter."

11

A picturesque and digmined figure. he was sentert cross-legged on beatskin in a thatched hut. He wore black and white robes of bre over a Bah-akini waisteunt and long cotton underpants.

It came within a million miles of a camel, eighty days after the comet had passed, Which reminds me of the man who said, "I was standing on the quay of Waterford the day Predictent McKinley

WIK khol Buffalo." "You Tract

n HITTOW shave," said his friend. Without comment

in

By RICHARD HUGHES

On hin black greasy hair was a North Pheifle breaks sluggishly on ceremonial cap of leather, cardboard a black: beach and the air is heavy and willow shavings whieh dangled and strange with sulphur fumes from like a pigtail down the back of his a nearby volcano. neck. His enlloused feet were bare. Around his neck glistened a necklace. of glass beads and from his large ears depended circular allver car rings.

I had called to discuss with him the march of liberation in Japan, the new democratic constitution and contemporary affairs generally,

the

The walls of his long, high but ore hung with curved swords, flintlocks, bows and arrows and bamboo spears, lined with incquered

fetishes of willow shavings to repel boxes and festooned with rustling

or placate the demons and dwarf life koropok-gurta who persecute Hairy and

Irreligious annoy the

The war, Miyamoto-nant conceded handsomely, had largely bypassed

Het the leader and spokesman Ainu. of the Hairy Ainus, the vanishing bearded aborigines who wore original inhabitants of Japan and who are now dying out in the remote fastnesses of Hokkaido,

The collars will trave England in un air-liner for New York. From At the age of 71, he lives com- there they will he flown to Holly-fortably in the little shig village of Shirasi, on the wild west coast (News item.) of Hokkaido, where the leaden

READ that thirteen years ago this | wood,

earth of murs had a close shave.

T

DANGEROUS WALKING

THE car in front opens out to a up the pleture. As is the thriller Crazy speed; gunfire comes tim the narrow road bugs the lill- from it, aimed at the side, twisting and turning as it un- police car giving close chase. coils itself to the 3,000 feet summit, The risad marrows and cork with a hair-ruising drop constantly screws and bemis like bairpin, while threatening on one side.

a sheer drop into the valley below mukkes the chase unbearably exciting......

The roads that Bank some of these hills were constructed by the Mill tury to be used in war, but their use for this purpose now being over. This flash-back into a film malo they are gradually becoming un- drama comes to me when I deve sable owing to landslides and ero- along the narrow twisting ronds that slom. follow up the hills in the New Ter It seems rather a pity tổ let them ritories, and I am thankful that the fall into disrepair-they are such bandit chuse is all imagination, and fun, even though they only wind up f is only the terrain that conjures the hill and down again;

And they

They've dug up Pop

BY PAUL HOLT

For this Rear-

WAX cut on the Volga some fairul reason, kind-hearted pure proved that there is a clear linked Mr Alan Brock if he could devise a display for the Crossing- between reptile and manmi. the Line ceremony. He could. The They have dug up full fossils of bill came to £80. a fellow called Titanophoneus potens, whom we must now regard as our ancestor, the furthes up the human family tree.

The order was cancelled, not, as you may readily believe, that any- body thought CBD was too expensive for the Queen, but because the in- voice had to go through so many départments they failed to And a admit that he might be responsible civil servant who was willing to for algning it.

He had a high, marrow altul, long chout, eyes plazed far back looking forward and outward, huge teeth in the front clamping :gether in 14 perfect tran, short, powerful legs and lu long claws, a long, thick tail.

was 12ft, long and ate the vegetarian members of his family. That was top.

A

So the fireworks went as a present the Queen.

POLICE VIEW

BOY of 18 was found dying on

a Brooklyn pavement, clad only

Apart from the toil, I know him in pyjamas, his skull fractured, and

well.

MAN OF THE FUTURE

MEANWHILE at Princeton, Pro-

A fessor J. B. S. Haldane has bech speculating on Junior. He thinks

ocross his chest, hacked out the Fetters NAZI in blood.

The police gave it as their opinion- there had been a student, rag.

They play rough in Brooklyn,

that the man of the future, if he IF I OWNED A PUB.... escapes destriction by radio-activity,

say:'

will probably Have great muscular WHAT dull names new pubs have, skill but little muscular strength, a

They catch the imagination of large head, fewer teeth; he would neither the wayfarer nor the sign develop very slowly, perhaps not painter. In consequence they are learning to speak till five years of beginning to run a danger of losing age, but continuing to learn up to their names altogether, now that 40, and then Eving several centuries, most people are content to

"Going

to the local?" or "Going up He would be more rational and the sand?" less Instinctive, less subject to sexual. If I owned a pub I would call it and parental emotion, to rage and to "The Front and Toad," because thus so-called herd instincts. "From our. I should be encouraging my palater point of view, he would be an un- friends to treat and glorious designs pleasant individual.. " says J. B. for the sign, while reminding my S. H.

customers that there is stil time for one for the road.

Titanophoneun potens would gobble him up in no time.

FUN FOR THE QUEEN

T

is not generally known, as the gossip writers say, that the Queen dearly loves a firework display. Evor zince she was a little girl it has been her prime idea of fun.

Or else I would call it "The Windy Bolin" or some such modern plea- rantry. We have come so far, no drearily far, from the days when "The Gont and Compasses" was "The God Encompasseth Us" and Jephant and Castle" the "Infant of Castile."

Have you a good name for modern pub?

- BY QUIZ-

give fine views, too. One can see Kowloon and the harbour spread out like a model relief map. The ships are like toys, and Kal Tak o toy aerodrome with rows of toy planese plane taking off, another flying in

to a smooth landing, A turn round the hill shows a com- pletely different view-green, gray hills, a setting for, bays and inlets of lapis lazul! blue, on which floot brown-sailed junks.

WINDOW ON THE WORLD

Stockholm-The Salvation Army that the police had to make them band from the small Swedish town queue up. It was nit too much for of Tranaus, known a "Sweden's Mr Bountiful. Ile sat down in a best brass band," has been invited guller and wept for his fallen men. to England to play at the Albert The police took him to hospital for Hall. The invitation has been ac observation. They said: "A man cepted and the band is leaving o! must be crazy Kanter,

to give his money.

BONER DE LUXE Conn-In

Hartford,

away

"NEGRO DANCERS Robned Harford: Paris:-Two mimbers of the Negro Connecticut Lieutenant-Governor Ballet of London, George Peters and James Shanffon was swearing in Agabitas Martins, were attacked and

the State's top judges. He called The robbed by three Algerians who ap Supreme Court of Errors the preached them with an offer to buy

"Court of Supreme Ermes".

MATCH SPLINT ROMANCE Pembroke, Out-Marjorie Degner,

British £1 nates.

"PARLOUR PINK" Hollywood-Many F

"parlour

GERMAN, DIVORCES Hamburg:-The discomforts of

of Liverpool, married the man she pink" employed by the film studios had been courting for six years by is getting a pink slip with his pay mal. She #met"

him by his name envelope, being written

on a case of match splints sent to the factory where she warked, Uridegroom Elmer Appoler wrote on the splints "for a lark" te arried life in one unticated room, trouble in providing a wife with tried to get to England! In the army. household essentials except at black She tried to get to Canada, Now market prices beyond the pocket of it's all over.

ኬኔ

WHAT IS A TOPER?·

honest wage earner, postwar morat laxity and the nervous strain Brantford, Ont-George Campbell induced by undernourishment and of Florida divided his estate among unemployment, are stated to be the six Canadian grandchildren who "are underlying factors in the increased There was a Hairy Ainu with-not habitual drinkers or smokers", divorce rate in the North Rhine- out legs in the village. There was Deputy Speaker of the House of Com. Westphalia districts. It is double another Hairy Ainu without sight. mons Ross has to decide whether a

the prewar Ogure, These two had overcome their cocktail before dinner or a toddy CONTROL 19 PROFESSIONS physical disabilities in realistic portis habitual drinking.

A cold constitutes drinking. That Regina, Saskatchewan--The San-

He is the katchewan CCF administrator.

Socialist Govert- If any of the grand- ment is preparing an act by which children drinkers or anokers they are cut off

conaldered habitual 10 professions will be put under Govermnent control boards Pro- with one dollar and the estate goes posed legislation will force doctors, to the rest,

lawyers, teachers, architects. fineers, chemists and surveyors to astrologists will be affected, apply for operating lleences. Even

nership. The blind man carried the legless man around on his shoulders. The legless man steered the blind

nin.

The pair even hunted 1ish in this fashion, Miyamoto-san assured me Hut, It seems they were too slow

to hunt, bears.

ATU

en-

RALD-HEADED BEAUTY Milan,-Glull Coral, of Milan bendty, is suing her best

29-year girl friend who gave her a home-mailo COSTLY PACHIYDERMS bottle of hate balm, which has left Johannesburg-Latest cost of liv her bald-headed. Glulla claims her ing Index is the price of two new. girl friend was Jealous of her flance. baby elephants which have arrived NORWEGIAN HOTELS nt Johannesburg Zoo from Ceylon. Oslo. This

year Norway will They cost £1050–300 percent above rebolid

of the tourist hotels prewar price. many which were destroyed during the war. The need is particularly great in northern Norway-"Land of The- Midnight Sun".

the

He questioned me closely about atomic bomb. To him, the bomu obviously was the final and irrefutable proof of the superiority of American Demoeruvy over the Japanese Way of the Emperor.

Like most reskients of Hokkaido,

HIROSHIMA FREAKS Miyamoto-sin professied great fear

Washington: Dr. J. B. S. Haidane of the Russians. He was of the tells American' selentists that the apinion that most of the malevolent first generation of Hiroshima's aton dwarts-the Koropok-guru who crab survivors may include "a flock harassed him in the night by pluck of freaks." ing his beard and frightening him in abnormalities after five or 10 genera-

He expects

peels a peak of

and smuggled into Hokkaido as a dreams were now organised, trained tions, Changes due to the atom bomb may keep turning up for flying Afth column by the Soviet, 10,000 years" he thinks. They rede the wind, he explained.

ERROR IN

IN ACOUSTICS and a dozen of them could hide Koston: There is almost nothing| under frying-pan.

оп the subject of sound that Profes "Not

For Richard Bolt, acoustics expert General MacArthur out of could democratize these dumens,"

at the Massachusetts Institute of

Hokkaido and the Hairy Altus.

Some of the Ainu boys had been called up to Right for the Emperor, Three; to his knowledge, had had their beards shaved off to conform with the discipline of the Imperiul Japanese Army.

But most of the young bloods of the tribe, it seemed, felt that the traditional beard was now

even

ARE YOU SURE? ANSWERS

Questions on Page 8

1. Three a.m. 2. Meal of parched dians: 3. Bitumen and shellac. 4. corn, eaten by North American In- Switzerland. 5. January 6.

6. Mrs labeturers in vineyard (St Matthew, Carlo Jacobs Bond. 7. Parable of 20. 6). 9. Dunkirk, for bravery of its inhabitants. 9. Quellent.

ANSWER TO PATEMAN PUZZLE (Boe Page 43

The coin was a fake, because

date. When he rebuked them, they he warned me. "Against them theechnology, does not know. When the term B.C, was unknown un- pointed out bafflingly that "beards atomic bomb will ultimately he was brought into traffic court at til after the birth of Christ.

In

were obviously out of harmony with MacArthur democracy as General was cleanshaven. As

after- thought, they sometimes added that the Emperor was also cleanshaven,

Of the war itself, Miyamoto said that he had heard only faint mailed explosions far away at sen when the American Navy was in Japanese waters.

than exhaustive in his references in Miyamoto-san was polite rather the bright new democratle dawn in Japan.

With careful driving there is no

Democracy, it appeared to him. real danger on these

because rouds. No, must be a powerful force the real dangers of the road haunt the Americans were democrats and the wide straight thoroughfares of

they had beaten the Japanese, who Hingkong and

were not democrats, Kowloon. Danger from careless and selfish drivers. and masses of Chinese pedestrians who cross busy roads as if they were quiet country lanes, their heads turned away from oncoming traffic as they poller foolishly scross, In a desperale suicide bid to join their ancestors.

stors.

Worse still at dusk or at night, when these pedestrians pretend they are already astral bodies. .clad in black or dark-hued garments that merge into the background, they lit like invisible beings in front of the car, And, after all, no driver can be blamed for running over an in- visible man!

The

course of

#wise addition for the safety of the reads, but it is up to the pedestrians to protect them- selves by making some effort to use the roads intelligently.

construction in the widest course of fares, are

Certainly he had reservations-- attributable largely to some regret- table confusion in his mind about the reason for it recent increase in the price of a bear-hunting cence. He blamed the new Diet for this Increase (from 25 to 50 yen--say, $3 to $0) Two of the local Hairy Ainu boys who ran for the Diet on a democratic Hairy Ainu platform of "Cheuper Bear Hunting" lost their deposits. And as soon as the new Diet assembled-bang! up went the fces!

He plunged into fulsome praise of MacArthur, The Halry Ainus, he declaimed, stood foursquare behind the Supreine. Commander.

But then, of course, they always had believed in the democratic ideals of community co-operation, he con- tinued. He

gave

interesting local example,

an

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necessary.

"The

ho

Cambridge recently, for ignoring n police whistle, they fined him £5.

CROSSWORD SOLUTION koropok-turn, uniuppily, Because of his job they refused to

Solution of yesterday's puzzle:- represent only one of several pust-believe that he did not bear the war problems which even the new whistic

Across:-1, Lousehold, 2, Axmins- democratie constitution will not be "R. BOUNTIFUL" WEPT

ter. 11, Gap, 12, Dolt. 13. Eclat. able to solve peacefully.

New York:-An ex-pug but now a 14, Ern, 10, Telegram. 10, Bread. successful lavern owner, Joseph 20, Dove, 22, Easter, 24, d. 25, "Another very serious problem." Bonavita decided to begin the New Ego. 20, Bean. 27, Rouen. 20, he eyed my piple meaningly, "is the Year well. With shortage of tobacco....Tinnk

£800 in his Wren. you pocitels, he set out for very much

Bown:-1, Lager beer. indeed. We

The Rowery,

2. Exact. Alaus, like

Hairy New York's, hang-out for derelicts, 3, Ample, the Americans, have to give it away. To passers-by he

4. Sida.

0. 5, Otter. always considered that

LOH 7. Dream. t. Notes. 10, tobacco- lung dollar bills with this message smaking is

Slog. 15, Ravine, highly democratic Make it a Happy New Year."

17; Lithe. 10, In

21. Eden. practice."

a few minutes there was such à mob

ត

Make sure-

You have a

Pleasure in Store!

Rog.

20, Drew.

Sou,

24, Bar.

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