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DEATH
FOR FIVE MONTHS
MY HOME has be come a green pasture for those friends, and neighbours who have been bombed out of theirs. And I am be- ginning to think that Bombees are much worse than bombs, •
I dislike other people's luggage their sponge bags. in the bathroom, and most of all their dogs, kept on leads in, the drawing room, hating us and trying to get sly nips at our legs in the "black-out. And I hate other people's combings in my hair brush.
June 9, 1941
Bombs and Bombees
By Phillida Hughes
Phililda Hughoz is the wife of the "Sunday Express"" / famous humorist, Nathaniel Gubbins, whose weekly column "Sitting on the Fence" is a national asset. Miss Hughes' sense of humour is equal to her husband's and, ifke his, probably developed subtle she was working in a newspaper office as a serious-minded reporter.
In those days she wrote aber
about fashions and other toplex which the Editor considered were suitable for his women
To relieve her feelings Miss Hughes, readers occasionally added pungent comments in pencil on the margin of her cop comments which the sub-editors joyfully read and reluctantly blue-pencilled.
When she finally turned her back on Fleet Street, she began writing such amusing sketches as the series: "A. Lady of No Leisure." But whereas Nat Gubbins likes to work in peace and quiet, Miss Hughes can turn out a witty article in the midst of a heated family argument, '
answer it. I hate, the thing. Never can make myself under- stood), or of laying a tabla; ("Where do I put the cruets? What shall I do with these knives?" I could tell you what to do with them, my sweet, but I won't.) A dithering procession from lounge to kitchen each holding one plato or one cup and saucer, which is placed gingerly on the nearest piece of furni- ture, is known as “clearing away the tea for you"Violet tells me several times a day that all this is going to Break Up My Home. Violet has seen it hap- pen so often and don't want It to happen" to me.
My pet Bombee, who never moves from the chair, nearest the fire, talks like the information gratuitously given in pocket diaries that no one over reads. She knows all the phases of the moon by heart-"Moon's up to night at. 9.8. That means they'll be over early. Let me see, it'll be half-moon Saturday week, and full moon for Christ- mas...
1 am tired of people who are always cold, the rubbing of shins, the banging of arms. Air raids have an I hate the way they sit on the grocer's. The butcher Shall I ever have my home to immediate effect on the cir-the edge of the chair and cajoled. Three hearty meals myself? Shall I ever know dis culation. I hate their more won't presume to lie back to be cooked for you each vine solitude, leisure and silence.
again? Night after night. I intimate belongings in my comfortably. (Lounge, fool, day, and the vegetables keep my pet Bombee company bedroom, mules with fluffy lounge! You're tired. brought in from the gar- by the fire, while the others are ostrich feather trimming, You've had a ceiling come dens. When are you going washing their hair, combing their dogs, polishing dear Pa- and the prolonged and ex-down on your head, we un to begin, pets?)
pa's spoons. No one has hinted
hausting goodnights and derstand.) I hate their Most of all I hate them yet at a move. hope you sleep wells. I hate constant "Is there anything for being pathetic and mak- their "Oh it's so kind" and I can do to help you?" (Yes. ing me so damn sorry for "Are we putting you to any There's clean linen to be got them. trouble?" And I hate them out for your beds. The at mealtimes with their maid's stony expression, to
Violet, the maid of all "Oh! more" and "Well just be softened. The rationed work, starts to shiver, and a teeny weeny potato, then." goods to be fetched from announces the
BULLOCK-Gladys Beatrice, be
loved wife of Harry Bullock and elder daughter of Mr and Mrs
W. A. Tomlin, at the War
Memorial Hospital on June 6, 1041. Corlege will pass Monument at 5.15 p.m. to-duty,
The
Thongkong Telegraph.
Monday, June 9, 1941. Wyndham St., Hongkong Telephone: 26015
THE prex "pecial to the Telegraph” is used by the "Hongkong Telegraph" to indicate news which is siřletly copyright under the provisions of the Telecommuni- cations ordinance, 1936, Such nowE AL Bears, the indication "UP"" is received in Hoogkong on the date of publication by the United Press Associations, who to- serve all rights and forbid republications, either wholly or in part without previous arrangement,
ENTRY INTO. SYRIA
Impelled
motives by
whose urgency no one can question, Britain' has acted with Free French troops against French-mandated Syria, re- vealing another extraordinary turn. of events in a war which began with Britain and France close Allies.
Americn who would like to see us taking the initiative, and Turkey who would like to see next her southern border any other Power but the Axis, will no doubt welcome the British action. The reactions of the heterogeneous population of Syrin with and the Levant are nwalted some anxiety on our part;
their reception of General Catroux' pro- clamation will decide whether the Allies will have an easy tenure-
nure-of-the- country with garrison forces against possible
attack-or parachutist whether they will have to combat the Arabs as well as the French,
However, the latter contingency scems improbable and the Allies may also expect that the French who have stayed with General Dentz will not have their hearts in a fight against countrymen whom they must know are enrolled in a worthier cause.
has
any
The attack on Syria is not likely to lead to a general conflict between the British and French nations. Admiral
Darlan
repeatedly assat French possessions, in-
Syria, will be against Britain. or other but he has never gone further. It would avall France nothing to de- clare against Britain and forfelt for ever the goodwill of America to save a territory that she should have given 'up two years ago and which she could now only pass on to her mortal enemy, the Germans.
A pamphlet rald over Unoccupied France would serve to put the issues squarely before the French people who could never tolerate the abject and dishonourable dealings Vichy Government if they were fully Informed of events; certainly they would never bear arms against Brl- tain. For that matter, it is certain that Hitler would not sleep nights knowing that French-armies were on the continent.
GRIN AND BEAR IT
4.20
MISSIN
aelf
Conversation between and pet Bombee:-
"Was that the siren?" "No. Your dog wheeing."- "Ooh! They'll be over early
Violet to-night, the devils."
"Pa'raps they won't." "But it's a full moon." "Let 'em come!"
a cold. is always too hot in sum- mer, too cold in winter. Sweating and mopping all "I think I'll go upstairs and Shivering and pay a little visit while it's quiet. flogging her arms all Decem- "yes. Will it be alright for
"I should." ber. And her feet, which me to go upstairs?" are just a pair of barome-
By Lichty August.
IWANTED
1991), Chwags Tuber, Yo
"The neighbours aro áccusing us of ruthless aggression, to stop snatching apples from Nick the Greek's fruit stand
till this Balkan-situation clears up!”
CONTRACT How to Play
BRIDGE
AND
How to Win
-By JOSEPHINE CULBERTSON-
Good Distribution Is Not Enough
ters, trouble her all the year
"Quite."
"You know what I mean,
round. Why do female feet don't you? Just to pay a little behave in this curious way?
Even gardeners, who
grumble at everything,
visit to..
**
"I know,"
Pause
"Ooh, there's one overhead
rarely mention their feet, now,"
"I don't hear it."
and who ever heard of a "Oh don't you? It's going postman collapsing in the like this" (painful imitation of hall and crying ""Well, I a droning Dornier.)
never thought I'd be able to deliver your bills and cir- culars this morning. Me poor feet!"
"Um.
.um.
"The Devils!"
"Um... um."
"Can I draw my chair a little
nearer to the fire?"
"Of course."
"That was a bomb."
"I thought. it was one of our
"No, it was a bomb, and near,
But even one extra guest can cripple Violet for a week. "We're in for a wet guns," spell," says Violet. "I know too." by me feet." Or "We're go- ing to have a heat wave, you mark my words: me feet have begun to swell."
"Go on."
"Do you think I could have a glass of water?"
"I should think so:" “Oh, shall I got it then ?” "Do you mind?" "Where do I get it?". "From the kitchen." "Oh, will it be all right then I go into your kitchen to get
Pity Violet can't offer services of her feet to the Government for weather reports. Cultured English if voice on radio: "A depres
"Quite all right." sion is moving eastwards "I think I'll just go upstairs and, according to Violet's again." feet, which have now begun to swell..
**
HE EVENING BLITZ
T STARTS, the sirens wail,
"Um...um.'
1."
"To pay a little visit, I mean. "I know."
Luter
"Could I put a little piece of coal on your fire?"
"Chuck a log on." "Oh, will it be all right if I
and we practically hurl our re- do that?" fugees on their tummies when a
"Of 'course. "Quieter
noiso like the inrushing tide isn't it?" sweeps overhead and racedės.
now,
"Oh, that's only a lull.
At the first "Look out!" every, know. The devils."
hand goes out for her own be longings-dear Papa's silver
of the IT is quite natural and proper to port was, of course, excellent, but spoons are clutched to a breast; attach great importance to the surely he had no right to assume a clock (it was a presentation distribution of one's hand and to that there would be only one loser to dear Fapa) is snatched from give great consideration to how well, outside. To credit South with such
It is Important for Britain, while prosecuting her aim in Syria with absolute armness, to avoid untoward friction with the French people-as it is equally important to them that they should not cut themselves Irrevocably from us. France Britain will always be neighbours; once again, it is to be hoped, they will be friends.
and
As for the Arab people on whom the war is now thrust, they are pro- mised the Independence for which they
have always yearned. The events of Iraq will serve as a useful object lenson to them. A usurper attempted a coup for the Axis, broke
the treatles with Brit- toln and was displaced and the former Regent re-installed with the minimum of violence British troops who were,
QB
by
proved, interpsequent
the
events wishes of all peoples and officials except Raschid Al
Immediate
following. The prompt and success": ful Britial: action-especially the re- Installation of the Regent may have Impressed the Moslem world favour. ably.
It is another strange chance of destiny in a war that has : brought anbjugation to so many countries that hore, in the Middle East, a new and independent kingdom can be -created-by-Briikh hands,
or how badly, it fits with partner's spade strength that there would be the mantelpiece, and the dogs bids. Even so, high cards can rarely no need of losing a space trick was get blast-proof cotton wool bon- be ignored; only under the most ex outrageously optimistic. And, since nets tied under their chins. traordinary circumstances can the had not
the oppo Then an orgy of ten making. opponents aces and kings be "put 10 North know that there would be no Do you care for a little arsenic
nents' diamond
sult, how
could "So refreshing?" (Yes, isn't it? diamond loser? North, in to-day's hand, took en-
As a matter of fact, tirely too much action on his two North should not have ventured to in yours?)
even five clubs, let alone six; he kings and a queen.
should have been quite content with South dealer.
the four spade contract.
sleep."
Both sides vulnerable.
K9764
OKJ7 +QJ1054
N
♡J978
O AQ 108 WE ..432
70
S
2 ODES
10 8 à base
♡AQ 10 04
AK834
The bidding:
Bouth
1♡
84
West North East
80 24 l'ass PADS
44.
·0 Pasa Pasa Paas Pasa
'Pass
Double
North's Jump to six clubs is the bid that I wish to bring under scru- tiny Binco North's honour-trick - holding was comparatively mentre, j only one and one-half plus, 14 in ob- vlova that he must have been great-
Then good-nights and hot wa- *****fter bottles, and a blanket off my And the After East's double of "six clubs, bed and on to yours. West opened the spode queen and, thought that it may be us to- whether declarer covered or not, he night, and to-morrow we'll be was doomed to go down two tricks, round at the Smith's or the Ro- To cover would permit a third round
spade ruff; to refuse to cover would binson's with our sponge bags give the enemy three natural spade and our pets, rubbing our shins, tricks, Four spades easily could clutching. Mother's, rosary have been made.
To-morrow's Hard North dealer,
Both sides. vulnerable.
K 7·108 09784
N WE
S
4AQ8
10542
OJ853
♡ KQ7 OAK 109 320 B
Impressed by the distribution of How should this hand to do his hand. It is difficult to see why tended against South's six diamond he should have been........10s club.sup- contract?..
baby's first shoe.
or
"Well, I'm all for lulls.". "Ooh, that was near!" "No. Miles away," "Devils!"
"Um."
"I think I'll go upstairs.
"I say, what's matter with your tummy?".
"It's those devils!"
Later
"Well, good night. "Good night."
"Are you all right?” "Rather!"
"Are you sure · you're all right?"
"Quite sure."
"Well, good night." - "Good night."
"Devils, aren't they?"
"They are."
Next morning "How are you?"- "All right." "Are you right?" **Rather!"
"Dreadful night, wasn't it? "Lousy."""
sure you're all
Violet and I are amazed at the curious mental and physical condition which is the result of being bombed out of one's home. Hands that are accustomed to wield mops and dusters can only rab legs, or lift tea cups "Well, I think I'll just go up. to lips, or draw chairs nearer to stairs to pay a little visit. May the fire after they have been 17′′ with us several wooks.
Henda
that have run houses for years
"Devils, aren't they?". "They are."
with a fair amount of compe Lookout! fence are incapable of anewol oth
Here comes an
ling the phone in mine. (Oh, you Davila, aren't they?
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