1938-04-19 — Page 18

THE HONGKONG TE LÉGRAPH, TUESDA

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The

Hongkong Telegraph.

TUESDAY, Åratt. 19, 1938.

PERENNIAL PROBLEM

“ALASKA AND A-LASS,”

A

AS ESKIMOS SAY

By Eddie "Bolow Zero" Kelly

COUPLE of summers ago we were in Green- land,

Now, there's a place!

We were boarding with a young married couple: in a semi-detached igloo.

We shared the igloo with several other couples, as the refugee problem-several people like ourselves had fled to Greenland to escape Hongkong's summer-had created quite a rent problem.

The Greenland government was dickering between build- ing some more igloos and fixing the rent at 25 dried fish per month. It appeared that rent would be fixed as most of the ice was required for adding to whiskies and sodes.

In the meantime the permanent iglooltes, who were always having children, solved the problem of space by feeding their brata to dogs. otherwise, as they explained to us, they couldn't possibly and accom modation for refugees.

The dogs were half St. Bernard, half wolf and half Alsatian. Very Bavage. You had to hit them across the beak with an axe to keep them from gnawing you. It was very agnawing.

The food was plain but varied. Fried walrus one day; perhaps a bit of roast penguin the next day, or a fillet of whale. A fillet of whale may sound like a lie to you, but up in those parts you get an appetite that a mad byena would be afraid to howl at.

We've eaten raw polar bear for hors d'oeuvres.

them while they're still rawing.

We had to leave Greenland in the end.

Dilettantes eat

We found that the Aurora Borealis didn't agree with us.

It tastes something like vodka, but it has a terrible effect on the stomach.

Since we returned to Hongkong, we have had to be very careful about our stomach. We can't take food, and we are on a strict diet of whisky, beer, gin, brandy, rum and very occasionally, as a special treat, a drop of stout.

We often pine for the carefree existence of the frozen north. And beautiful Mphistitokoki.

There's a girl for you.

Her nature was so passionate that when we started elineling the

Igloo used to melt.

It seems years and years since we thaw her.

The Building

of a Battleship

People who own motor cars and matsheds and are able to make use of them through the weeks of hot weather now ap proaching are singularly fortun- ate. There is another strata of society not quite so fortunate, and mainly Chinese, which is able to walk or cycle or travel by bus to the more accessible seashore

Saturday after Lieut.-Commander noons and Sundays. On Easter

K. EDWARDS Sunday hundreds of these latter invaded the beaches and it must be admitted the result was not

on

of

By

thumps the table in the Admiralty be shall and decinres: "There battleships." This

delightful Oction. The decision to build even

* &

MA

1939 by Vidied Futuri traduik kan

"There wouldn't be war scares if ALL the nations disarmed Suh!

-The Confederacy has disarmed, Suh

Do You

SEE ENOUGH

of YOUR SON?

By-

'J. H. Storrington

S

one battleship is taken by the whole not

THEN on

one day he asked me something about

a horse. I gave him the first answer that came to my head. There was silence for a consider- able time, and though I con- IR PAUL LATHAM, tinued reading I became con- Bart., M.P., has an- scious that all was not well nounced that he will beneath the yellow curls.

seek re-election to I glanced his way and saw that Board of Admiralty only alter deep Parliament because he the little mouth was very down

and earnest consideration of barrow- loads of evidence.

at-

to have

wishes to spend as much at the corners and there was Much of this ovidence is not, time

as possible with his something very shiny about the blue eyes. I felt like a big cad, R.N. (Ret.) strictly, Admiralty evidence at all

but concerns

weighed son, who is now three years dropped my book and swept the carefully entirely satisfactory from the THE modern battleship costs Cabinet decisions regarding the state old, and will in a few years' child on to my lap and asked him

£7,000,000-not a sum to be of foreign rettenpeace, then time go to boarding school. with the sad looks betokened.

of point of view of the "regular lightly spent, even by a Govern ther

are reports from naval

"You never answer my ques- customer." Scores

His decision seems littlement,

taches and from the Commander-in- people scattered sand and

Chief of foreign stations concerning evoked a certain measure of sur- tions," he said in voice that was In normal times the money the plans of other naval Powers. To prise, I have nothing but ad- trying with desperation not to orange peel and bits of greasy available for the Navy is strict day there is yet another quealfon to miration for the member for sob, "I hear you talking with other people and you tell them paper, and got under foot.ly limited, so that the decision be considered. That is whether the

involves great advances made in air power Scarborough.

such interesting things. Large parties camped right at to build a battleship

have rendered the balticship

Now we must be clear in our the doorstep of the matshed-economies in other directions obsolete as a weapon of war. This

"I try to remember some of dwellers and practically spoiled such as the curtailing of cruiser is not a question which is decided by minds as to exactly what Sir

of large or destroyer building. To-day argument. The evidence

Paul has done. He has not given them and ask you about them- the day for a good many people. the situation is rather different. numbers of highly technical experi- The philosophical said:

ments has to be examined and im-up a career by which he derives when the people have gone, but

doesn't happen very

often." day, and the Government has said partially have to be kept secret. It has income, he has put aside an you answer me like a baby. I a consider- wanted to know if a man on a is obviously bad policy to broadcast interest involving But, nevertheless, they were that no considerations are to weigh for the benefit of other

nations the able amount of work and a great bicycle could go as fast as a against the rapid attainment of

be- results of experiments which

horse, and you said: "Downbill not pleased. They pay their security. But there is still no room lieves will enable one to

to build a expenditure of time, and offering with the wind behind him..."

little enough reward, so as to

"It

Rearmament is the order of the

fifty dollars a year to the for waste. The maximum degree of better ship than anybody else.

security must be got out of every If the sum total of all these ques-give his time to his child.

&

without tions points

doubts to the.

That little speech and a lot

Ibuild a matshed and they pay not to contribute some vital factor to the Admiralty will recommend that in making decisions of a similar utter selfishness. I realised I have found great happiness that followed woke me from my that I had invited this little man into the world, into my house, and I was treating him as a nuisance.

for Bort.

Government for the right to penny spent, and skilled men cannot

be spared to build a ship which is need for the building of

of battleships, contractor anywhere from the scheme defence.

battleships shall be built-provided, of course, that such a step is

is not for four hundred to fifteen hundred

disarmament treaty, There are people who seem to think bidden by any dollars to erect their summer that the question of building a battle

as it has been for

considers the re- shelters and they feel they have ship is decided simply by a choleric Then the cabinet const six years. Time Begrudged a right to a certain amount of and heavily gold-laced admiral who commendation of the Admiralty in privacy, if not exclusiveness.

the the

as

IF

we look around us we shall see how slight and

So hard did remorse strike me

the light of many questions of foreign polley. If the answer remains for security,

the building of such a ship grudging is the share of time that I actually tried to plan his will be authorised under the Navy and thought which most fathers education at my own hands. Estimates or a Supplementary Esti- yield to their boys in their mate presented to Parliament.

But there is also the question of

when completed. This decision can

is always

younger years ...

And so they have. But the They would have to be free or

I wondered if it would not be beaches are public property and they would not be used by those there can be no legislation to for whom they are intended.

best for me to teach him myself And finally-and this the prevent anyone who has

remedy for the whole of

Until a child is five or six it is, during his prep. days. To do so energy to walk or the money to overcrowding problem new what the new battleship is to be like according to the economic stand- entirely I found Impossible be ride to them getting what en-land bigger. beaches should be only be arrived at by the considera- ing of the house, loft in the cause of the need to work for my living. But I threw up golf and joyment is possible there. made accessible to the general tion of all manner of different fac-hands of its mother or nurse.

tennis and gave the time to him There are two or three things public; or alternatively, the old tors. The consideration

before the Admiralty; not because At the age of six or seven the which might be done, however, ones made more accessible, and the Admiralty is always wanting to boy attends some school, a prep. He Had Changed to improve the situation. For more rernate resorts opened up build battleships, but because, were school (usually as a boarder) if

for the matshed or summer it not so, much

time might clapse

LOVE of the task grew instance, there might be some

on me, and I. forsook sort of beach supervision; rules cottage dweller. It is natural after the authorisation of a ship be- there is the monay, so as to pre-

that the "bus picnicker" should fore the design could be approved, pare for public or secondary my clubs in my enjoyment of the

and even then there would be a school later. which would prevent the noma-find his way in large pumbers great chance of mistakes being made.

response which came from the dic tent dweller from pitching to Repulse Bay, for instance, it is only by keeping designs con- In the holidays a father takes child. his camp in such a place that he and it is quite out of the ques- stantly up to date on paper that a

And I found from his first shuts out the view and the cool tion to place any restrictions in truly emcient ship can be built when a certain notice of the child and

required.

continues his golf, his bridge, sca breezes from the permanent his way. But there are other First among the factors determin- his darts, or his club as spirit school report onwards that I had enabled him to accumulate 80 inhabitant. There might be re-places, on the Island and the ing the design of battleship are the

much knowledge and to reason ceptacles provided for the refuse mainland, where the general limitations imposed by treaty. At moves him.

His own experience, his know so well that ho took his place Inch guns. Within these limits from the feast; and somebody public has not yet made inroads, Present these are 35,000 tons and 14- to see that they were used for and which might be reserved dozens of different "requirements" ledge, his ideas vory rarely guide with other boys with consider the purpose. And there might for the more well-to-do who have to be juggled about before it is the lad, and the understanding able advantage.

com and affection between father and His first holidays were at once some sort of structure to desire privacy and are willing to certain that the design will be

bo

serve the children in search of a'jpay for it. It is suggested in Promise giving n maximum possible son only occasionally rank with the saddest and the happiest public convenience, and some-all seriousness that the rovenue/cclency in every department those between mother and son.

The requirements are drawn from sources.In the first

navics. It

i

moments of my life. I tried to body to see that it is used for which is derived from the many different

dre the plans of foreign Now, upeaking of normal renew the old relations, to search the purposes for which it is in-matahed communities: might place the obviously useless to cases, there is, in my opinion, no bis mind for the marks of tho tended. These are matters in very well be spent for develop-build a ship which will be inferior tutor in the world from whom a now experience and smooth or which the authorities could ing beaches and picnic ng the tohto with whom it may have to boy can learn so much as from deepen them with my mature axert themselves without hurt for the less fortunate among fight. Then there are ing anyone's feelings. There is people of this Colony. Perhaps deduced from the results of war his father. I had this brought knowledge. I suggested some of

the games we used to play.

But something was amiss.

another suggestion, too, which in such a scheme is the seed for games and fleet exercises carried out, sharply to my notice when my

From these the Commanders-in- own boy was about six.

is put with some trepidation, the solution for a perennial pro-Chief have formed the opinion that for it is by way of being ablam which commences to be the ideal battleship shall have cer I was fond of the little fellow, He had changed. He sought the luxury plan. But it would be a distinct nuisance to a good facility ma mar ot wines, armament naturally, but he irritated me as friendship of other boys and his enormously useful if plenie- Į many people and which oventr... facility in manoeuvring, arraour pros much as ha evokød my affection conversation left me no open-

Then the technicians step in. The His eternal questions interrupted ings Daily he left me for oth the beaches, could-be-provided, Hongkong grapples with It gunnery experts wil adybeste er my reading and other pursuits, company

(Continued on Pack 6.1944

places, at a little distance from ally will be really serious unless

with treatle tables and benches. determinedly.

tection, and: ateaming radiu