1937-04-05 — Page 22

COWBOY

HOLIDAY

P

ERHAPS you have for gotten your holiday?. Mine, I know, will always linger in my memory.

I went by freighter to the Gulf Coast. South, where. Negroes practise voodoo in Now Orleans cellars; whore the Spanish moss drips from dark boughs like vampire-bats; and speech is slow; and men still talk of the Civil War,

Then South-West-where the Shawnee and Goodnight- Loving cattle trails wind across Texan prairies, cowboys ride through the mesquite brush, oll derricks are silver against the flerce sky, and barbecued rattle- snake is a delicacy,

My voyage was a featureless track-but down to the fringe of the Sargasso Sea, where ancient ships lle eternally be- calmed in seaweed; past Cays where buccaneers hid their plunder; past low shores, where pearly skyscrapers preside over distant cities, like cathedral spires over an English town.

New York manners, or the movies, may have given you a wrong idea of American official- dom. In the South-West, om- cialdom will not bark at you, but greet you with friendly courtney.

At Panama City, the Customs officer (shades of diamond- smuggling Hollywood stars!) drove me into town in his car; at Tampa, the immigration ofl- cer (shades of Ellis Island!) was glad I had not gone East, and hoped I'd have a pleasant time.

Even the police! Why, the -town constable in one prairie. centre tried to sell me a cari He was either a car salesman or a policeman in his spare time- I forget which way round it was.. I know he took the job because it meant he could legally "tote his gun around "—so useful in dealing with awkward cus- tomers!

You see, they are not used to foreign tourists in the ranch country, or along the Gulf-ex-

-To-day's Thought THE greatest of all pleasures

is to be alone.

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New Orleans (Negro "N'eans") and look on us as non-adult individuals to be shepherded, examined with curiosity, and treated with that. superb hospitality which is their tradition.

Wherever you land you can' go to the cowboy country. cheaper far by bus than train.

The last 300 miles of my Journey into Western Texas cost ono pound and a few pence, took from breakfast to supper (early meals the rule), and allowed amplo pauses for refreshment at bus-stations, where loud- speakers announce dopartures in sunny restaurant, walting- room, and even wash-room.

A wonderful bus line that! For it will take you from Now York to the Mexican border, or across the continent to the blue Pacific:

The driver-conductor-inci- dentally called "operator "-19 introduced to you, to give the personal touch that America loves, by having his name in- scribed on a sort of wooden visiting card which he hangs over his seat.

He is careful, courteous, and dressed Ulko A Ruritanian prince: two tones more sub- dued, perhaps, than the Texas Highway police, who are as good looking as movie prin- cipals. In polo boats with lavender breeches striped with red.

If you are plutocratic, you can buy for £9 or less a second- hand car, warranted for "thou- sands of miles of carefree trans-- portation" in a land where petrol is cheap, and tourist- cabins provide you with cottage and garage for four shillings a night.

Practically the only advertise- ments you will encounter will be outalde townships, where under- takers beg motorists to be careful, -and-lf-you-are-not-adviso-you- that they have "wrecking-truck " and ambulance on call, as well as a" funeral home."

The Alms may, have led about

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the manners of officialdom: but haven't

exaggerated the West, Texas shows it,

No, sir!

You

28

will

have met

everybody bo- fore,

on the

This is not je author, but he did things nearly as unconventional

B creo - tanned men thronging small- · town sidewalks, with wide

hata and khaki pants tucked into half-boots; floppy niggers; Mexicans with hats as big round as the table on which our aspidistras stand; coloured lasses tied up with bows like Topsy dolla, made up with lip- stick and mauve face-powder, and with hair dekinked as sleek as sealskin; and armed police- men lounging in shirt sleeves, with cigars between their teeth.

It is all exactly as you thought:

And if the Blms make the cowity out to be a sentimentalist—. belleve it I've seen tears in the eyes of a tough cattleman (who had had nothing stronger than Iced ten) na he sat under a star-dotted sky lis- tening to that beloved song of the ranches, "The Last Round-Up."... And Shirley Temple The groat heart of the Prairie just lies at her fcot.

I can't say I saw any shootings. Sorryl

But I drove n car full tilt aerosG the prairie, rounding un on.indis the sheria durn aight too "ready with his gun, brother!" I met a Congressman who cut his telephone line and. flung the in- strument into the road to register- annoyance.

I

went to a cattlemen's barbecue, where a thousand of us had a fres feed of beef ronsted in a trench, bread, potatoes, salad and beer; fell in love with a cow-girl — nothing on the films to equal heri

I anld "Howdy" to a meek little father of thirteen.. who had pumped hot lend into a gentleman with whom he disagreed-

I also watched four nonchalant police unearth the body of come- one who had "got in bad" with. someone else, on ́almost my first

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by in America. But no one tried

live up, or die down, to the over- brel

|I met a judge. It's easy. There to hundreds like Louisianan ploncis. I had met him before nyway-in nearly every American am I have ever seen.

He had a platinum blonde secre- kry, and a mane of white hair. He buld roll a cigar from alde to side this mouth while he talked, and .it accurately over his shoulder to distant cuspidors without trning his head, or interrupting tie now of conversation.

II' you want to see ranch life rom within-do what lota dof. priit up, to the largest ranch you an And, and ask in your English kecent if they take paying guests. Ten to one they never have, but wil by tickled to death at the noth for the fun of it, because you are a foreigner, to have someone new to talk to and about!

Affer all, there are only six mil- Hon people in Texas, a country bigger than France, Belgium ana Holland combinedi Ten to one

they will have electric light, the biggest radio and refrigerator you over saw, three cars, Mexican house-servants—and no books!

And immediately the news will spread, and from miles around there will come u-visiting—acrosa by-rands little better than cattle- trucks-ladies in New York gowns, their pretty faces made up to beat the band, with children with painted finger-nalis, and hospita- bio husbands with whisky-flasks In their hip-pockets-just in case supplies should run out.

Someone will lend you a horse, and nobody will mind you driving their carl

New York! Pahl Spend the same money, and go and see the Breflies dance along the prairie trails, the armadillo diving into the long grass, old Brer Terrapin whizzing along the fighway at a hundred yarda an hour, and the cattle moving like wraiths across the limitless plains in the short. Texan dusk.

ROUNDABOUT

by The Showman“,

OU may know that story of the two coloured gentlemen tramping along a weary read

་་

In America. One said: "Ocef An wish Ah could lay down! The other a type on which we should all-model-ourselves-Tuplied;"

Taint no

good jus' wishin', brothah, yo's gotta make an effort."

T

At this moment I am making an effort to lie down peacefully under a barrage of foreign rumours and "bombshells,""

Perhaps they will be contradicted or qualined on Monday, in accordance with the usual rixe. Then I could isstro - one of my own bombshells—" Friendly Common Sense Inspires Meeting of Powerst"

This, of course, has been contra- dicted already.

A BIT ABOUT. SHARKS

NOVELISTS have queer habita. Mr. Peter Peroxide, who is my pet, is Dover happier than when dancing with bluebells in the summer," and" with - falling leaves, in the autumn. In the winter bo places a nightly hol-water battle at the foot of his old apple tree, and slaps the wrist of any robin who interferes with it (A

Mr. Zano Grey likes fishing for sharks. He has just returned from the Great Barrier Reef, off the coast of Queensland, convinced that there aro sharks 100 feet long. 'He is going back. to catch one with 15-feet sharks for balt.

A shark 100 feet long is not so very long. I atico caught a shark much longer than that from a launch. I had left my mate on an island, and landed. to describe my catch to” him.

"Starting from here,”. I anid, "It was about this long ... ." And we started to walk. Belleve me, or bellevo. me not, but, before we had covered a quarter of a mile, the "island.” sank-

Us sang arl night for to drown ur yowlings, And ur had to stand oop in carriage on way to church. El, things bain't laike they used to balu, more's the pity!.

THE PURPLE PAPERS THIS instalment of my adventures,

as "L" the Secret Service Agent, with the Barnesa Klinka..........wickedly. seductive spy, continues from the im- prisonment of myself and my Chief In the Black Room.

**Chief!" I pasped. How did you got here?"

was suspicious," he soapped, .* when I saw you get into that taxi. It was but a moment's work to diegulsa myself as Pogo, the evil scarred Negro, follow you here, and leave. Poto bound in a corner."

The door opened, and. Dlinka ap«. peared, leading a marling panther on a platinum chain. There was a lump on her head the size of two cops.

"Bol My brave Engleeshmen!" she Hissed. "You had beltair zink fast, yes? For you arrre to be taken into so prrresence of ze Human Snake!"

(To be continued.) ·

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beneath us. It was another shark. The P.&O. Banking

basking, by Joyal Overheard

HAD tus supper cooked-over Bo #nice-becaliso he swore he could get off."

"I know. It does dishearten you, don't it?

But what the end of it will be, I shall never know.

Quaint Old Customs

viders and, agudiu" are "mai shanos to be. Make your pant udent Line wAY.”

TO SAN

ananghai, Kobe, Yokohama,

Honolulu, Ban Francisco, Panama

Canal and Hajjára,

Pres. Coolidge

Pres, Taft

Pres. Hoover Pros. Lincoln Pres. Coolidgo Pres. Wilson

10.00 a.m. Apr.

8.00 n.m. Apr. Noon

MA

INTER: VICTORIA "THE EXPRESS ROUTE"

Via Shanghai, Kobe and "Yoko-

18 Pros. Jackson 21 Pres, Jefferson' 1 Pres. McKinley 10 Pres. Grant Jutio *8.00 a.m. June

8.00 am.. May Noon

EUROPE, NEW YORK · AND BOSTON

3 Pres, Jackson 18 Pres. Jefferson

Via Manlia, Singapore, Penang, Colombo, Bombay. Bucs Canal,

Naples, Genos and Marseilles.... Pres. Harrison

Pres. Polk

Prés, Plored. Pres, Van Buren Pres. Garfield Prea. Hayes

7

Midnight Apr. 10 Midnight Apr. 28 Midnight May Midnight May 21 Midnight June Midnight June 18"

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4

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ACROSE

1 At once can give mo timely aid 9 Town in Surrey;;-

10 Barking should be avoided by

people

from auffering

this

.

disease. 11 Wherein indies may have scraps

for

scraps.

12 The food that gave one of the

family a start,

15

17

garment.

ameli

this.

of

They

yachting circles..

Corporation, Ltd. 18 Evidence

(Incorporated in England, 1030),,

Authorised Capital Bubscribed and. Pald-up Reseres Fund

world,

£3,500,000

prosperity in

19 Shrink ilke many in drink. 21 This dog often attains to many

stones.

£3,694,130 42

110,000 23

A palindrome.

Bird distasteful to Spaniards, 26 One may call this or an agent,

but there's no disputing it.

27 Put a brat in this to make it

shake.

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WEST END-BRANCIL B *14-15. Cockapur Street, London, B.W.1, - BRANCHES 1--Bombay,:: Calcutta, Callesi. Coimbatore, Colombo, Hongkong, Madina, MY antiquarian friends and I were Uhanghai, Vingapore tranny A 28 This is right in the square,

Interested to read of the beautiful

Avenclestin principal towns of the 30. An ald to bowing and scraping. Bosnian girl, Jelena, Jocipovitch, who General Exchange and Banking brainom 33 Perfect start to a game of cards. was kidnapped in a cart by a jilted transacted. Losna and overdrafts, granted on 35 At the banquet he has a warm loyer on the eve of her marringe, and Approved security. Current and Fixed Deposit start and a flowery finish. recovered in the Bazin (cart, by, har

33. A frill. SAVINGS ACCOUNTS IN LOCAL OUR- -betrothed - and; ́bis friends. TheRENCY Interest, allowed at 25% per annum. 37 To return the charge.

rescuers spent the rest of the'night in

ETERLING BAYINGS, “ACUOUNTS ----

DOWN caong..

Interwet allowed at rates which may be obtained on applies tion.msmpe TRAVELLAKEE CHEQUES AND PASSENGER KITRAVELLERANG LETTERS OF CREDIT. LETTERS OF OBEDIT (lay nge-on bound P. O, and B. 1. Blaauwer and at Ports of Gali) are " issued at: current, rats, of ye chauve and free of commisions. AMERICAN EXPRESS TRAVELLERS UILEQUES• mold

Brillah. Theome Tax Recovered. Andaj ka **y: Maroruto rallyma-and-Truetemkips-undertaken.

KOTON:

That kidnapping be an old custom down Abbot's Anorting way.. Of moind |mo:- thaly "ma"""" darter"""Cloompy, the Noodger," went, back'ards and, ferrards ten toimes, the night "nfore' 'ur were wed, "tween Abbot's snorting and Much. Popping, in young: Eli/ Rabbity's cart, wil hana any, apples an' lattes-az:arl']

maye, and ur wore bruised proper 1-3

2. This official, may be proud of

his corporation.

3 Change welcome for a hird. 4'In this body · I ·am· alther, aldë

of a legislator.

6 This may be extracted from

This is used to cooking. All possess part of it, but not. profundity entirely

8 Taking things for granted.

12 Part of London was a mendicant

order.

13 This

would enable one to answer any question.

14 A canine,

15 One must do this to make 15

across

16. This King is always on the

move.

20 This might put

put one to sleep.

24 Mania in this a language,

20 Feminine name.

28 To do this makes a change.

20 Not the first homo.

31 German town,

32, By no means lively.

34 Eastern priest.

Saturday's Solution ROPE IMPRIS EUA

GUB

SUALIZE OVE 屈

MOUN

B