8
THE HONGKONg Telegraph, Saturday, May 9, 19 36.
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The
Hongkong Telegraph.
SATURDAY, MAY 9, 1936.
Preserved by
Mr. J. SCOTT HARSTON and visited by
LASZLO SCHWARTZ, Humorist and Caricaturist
N outstanding indivi-
dual is in some respects like an old masterpiece done in oil.
Both must have the proper frame to show them off to best advantage. Rip the great Dickensian characters from their frames and even they would lose much of their distinctness, their ro- mantic and exotic value.
But what a change in the man, nay, even in his facial expressions, when you meet him in his lair. No wonder a wise man advised us
never to take
inventory of man as he is found at business, for he may be Dr.
Jekyll at home.
However, the
wise man
On second thought, how be fitting this Dickensian simile is on this particular occasion, for ever since I first saw Mr. Hars- ton cuddled up in the corner of doesn't go far enough in his a comfortable couch in the analysis. Man also discloses Hongkong Hofel, I've been hidden traits (best or worst) if longing for the ability of you take him from the country Dickens, a Gorki or Anatole France so as to commemorate his verbal portrait as I have aimed to whisk his character on to puper in this sketch.
side to the city or vice-versa, There are few exceptions to this rule. These are the most rug ged and highly developed of all individuals. Those who have
the uncanny ability of carry ing with them their native characteristics and atmosphere
NOTES OF THE DAY just as a turtle or snail carries
TRADE REVIVAL
his own home.
finitely better to the expression of humour than others. No doubt if you study Chinese humour from that angle you will discover much in the sing
ng nature of the Chinese language that invites humorous expression. Just as the phone- tic characteristics of Dutch and some other tongues is well nigh anti-humorous."
**
LEST Mr. Harston attack my mother tongue, I hastened to inform him that though in sounds, hisses, groans.. and grunts the Hungarian language resembles two dogs barking ut one another with no ill-feeling in their heart and teeth, never- theless, it lends itself wonder fully well to the expression of humour in all shades, from the palest pink to the reddest red.
SMALL NATIONS APPREHENSIVE There need be little surprise at the report of the possibility of certain of the smaller coun- tries resigning from the League of Nations. In the event of any
Mr. Harston is one of these He admits as compromise being reached with
A year without parallel in the privileged few. Italy on the Ethiopian dispute. history of industrial recovery is much when he tells me: "Yes, From the very start, these recorded in the annual report of the I would say that change in nations have stood firmly by Ministry of Labour. The indus climatic, economic and social the principle of joint action tries of Great Britain, practically conditions, as well as our con- without exception, have advanced stant contact with the Chinese against the declared aggressor: towards baiter times than they people, have brought about they are fully conscious of have enjoyed since the post-War telling changes in our apprecia- booni. Eniployment figures have danger which might arise to attained record proportions. Un-tion and expression of Humour. themselves if the League at this employment has fallen beyond all Nevertheless, even after all
And as to swearing in Hun- these years in Hongkong, I can stage throws up its hands in the expectations of a few years ago.
case of non-plus ultra. That's helplessness and allows Italy to In the carefully analyned returns of only express my sense of hu- garian, ah well, it is simply a
mour best I know when I revert
one of the main reasons why swallow up
Ethiopia. Well cause for anxiety-the never to my native Yorkshire dialect, the Hungarian language sur- might they argue that if the ceasing concentration of industry in Whenever I am compelled to use vived throughout its 1,000 rights of small nations are to be London and the South-east. Wales the King's English, I feel like a year-old history of the Tartar, and the North of England remain violinist who is robbed of his Roman, Turkish, Russian, Aus- sacrificed in this way, they have the last areas to share in industrial bow and can only pick the tune trian and Roumanian invasions. nothing to hope from continued recovery.
on his instrument. The truth: Outstanding facts and figures in of the matter is that some membership of the League.
As long as a Hungarian felt every now and China's-loss-of-Manchuria and the report are:-In December last
the number of British workers em languages lend themselves in like swearing the Italian intention to annexployed was 10,699,000-"the highest Ethiopia are cases in point, in ever recorded during the 12 years which connection sight must not for which comparable data
available." be lost of the fact that both
On the average, there were 282,- China and Ethiopia are members 000 more persons in employment in of the League, In which they 1935 than in 1934. Last year closed with an unemployment figure have unavailingly, it would of 1,869,000—a reduction of 217,000 seem, put their trust. It is on December, 1934, the lowest apparent that considerable December figure, recorded since
1920. nervousness is felt by some of
insured workers there remains one
are
ployment and the insured popula-
BULLS AND INNERS
ᄆᄆ
From the Office Butts
0
merely emigrated from his winter lounge quarters.
D
The average percentage rates of Through American eyes, Hong- A new species of lizard was the smaller European nations at unemployment among insured work- the moment, faced with the fear fors fell from 19.8 in 1933 to 15.3 in kong is supposed to be the "wonder-discovered at Repulse Bay this that a major conflict may brenk 1936. "Finally," it is stated, "inful city of contrasts." Nudista week. We understand that he had out, in which their position Great Britain as a whole, both em- and prudists. might well become perilouston have substantially increased, Sweden, Holland, Austria, and the whole in both cases being pre-
The police auggest a censorship others besides, are now looking dominantly in the South: as regards of pornographic literature. We to their military state and employment, almost entirely so."
the northern divisions, however,
hope this won't mean cancelling our strengthening their defences, and markedly in Wales, employment subscription to Home Chat. Denmark, in particular, appears has failed to keep pace with the to be apprehensive of the possi-increase in the insured population." bility of loss of territory in the:
seem
In
They can say what they like about Shanghai, but even Charlie Chaplin will admit that Hongkong is the only place in the Far East where he has enjoyed modern times.
O
The Romans, we read, were very fond of card games. Yes; wasn't it a man named Horatius who held
A political commentator thinks the first bridge party?
over-ward!
C
口
O
4
* O O. Maybe these motor-bus races in Kowloon represent the drivers' con- event of a European war break-it would not be better to arm
tribution to the movement for ing out. A few years ago, the to the full extent necessary to Danes, relying on the protection asked whether it would avail
ensure security. It is sometimes speeding things up in the Colony.
口 of the Great Powers and on the these small nations anything if principle of collective security, they wore to re-arm to the reduced their defence forces to fullest limits that their finances the League of Nations should con- a very low limit-to little more permit. Those who put this tinue fu existence, even if there are
A prominent resident was over than a police force, it is said. query suggest that if a big war further defections. Half a League, i
broke out, the small countries half a League, half a League, on-hoard to remark that this heat Those days of fancied security would be immediately
makes him lose his dash. It's not now to be over. Den-whelmed, and that it would be
the heat it's the humility! mark is asking herself whether better for them to be passive there is not a real danger, in and take what fate send them. An overseas visitor who played the face of the expansionist This may be a shortsighted view, golf in Hongkong some months ago, movement of which much is though. In the Great War, the has summed up the standard of heard in Europe these, days, of played a useful part..
smaller nations engaged therein play here as "unimpressive"-the
Singly whole in one word. her“ territorial integrity being they might count for nothing, placed in jeopardy, A free but working in conjunction with
It is urged that more people passage to the Baltic is an ab-others, all well armed, they solute necessity to the Danish might present awkward pro- should attend church services in people, and it is apparent that blems for the bigger combatants. there exists some fear that this Be that as it may, it is evident the Far East. As far as Hong might be lost if a major that the situation created by the kong is concerned, this would solve conflict were to occur.
Den-failure of the League to curb an the problem as what to do with mark has hitherto put much aggressor has given the small those dud ten-cent pieces.
cause for serious faith in British policy. The nations
□ thought which now occurs to thought. They assuredly can her, and to other smaller na not be blamed if they begin to tions as well, is whether it la lose faith in any general system wise to trust in others: whether of collective security."
☐ ☐
וי
storiest
then (and he isn't one if he doesn't he simply had to re- member his mother tongue, for in no other language can a man vex as In the tongue of the Magyar. Yes, even better than in Yorkshire or Lancashire dialects!
That
riled the Yorkshire "tyle," and forthwith Mr. Hars- ton retaliated with this York- As to shire gem of humour. the delicious dialect, I will only be able to jot. it down as he tokl
it. Mr. Harston can roar an. oath in Hungarian as rhapsodi- cally as I can:
A Yorkshire lad came home to his village from abroad, where he had prospered exceedingly. After kind enquiry regarding the health of his father, he asked the latter how he had been getting on.
"Champion, lad, and I've saved Aume money. and all!" answered the father.
"Have you got it in the Bank 7" ́ ́ kaid the Hon.
"Nay, safer than that" replied the father, with a knowing wink.. "Where is it?" asked the son. "Upstairs in the bedroom" on- swered the father,
"That's not safe-it will get. stolen" remarlied the san..
"It won't," said the father. "It would take a clever man to shirt a hundred pounds in coppera!"
The father, then, shaking his head sadly and sighing, added by Way of an afterthought: "I've an idea that your mother and our Lizzie help themselves to it. sometimes, but the worst of is if I try to check up on it it takes me all Sunday to count it!"
攀
*
To my question whether a sense of humour was of great value to him in his practice Mr. Harston assured me: "India- pensable. Take this case for example. I went into evidence with a client, and, of course, insisted that he tell me the en- tire story. Well, he didn't, and as a result we lost the case. When I reproached him about it, he smiled and said: "Ah, but you are a smart solicitor and so I wanted you to find it out for yourself."
"Are the Chinese clients good losers?"
"Yes-but then, that's natural, for their grent gambling in- stinct accounts for their phlegma whenever a decision However, goes against them. there are exceptions. Take one of my clients who was shaken up mercilessly by Mr. Potter. during cross-examination. This chap came up to my office next day and said: 'Mr. Harston, please issue at once a writ against Mr. Potter."
"A writ for what?" I wanted to know. A Shanghal journal suggests
"Defamation of character !! that the Kowloon tiger
my indignant. may keep tourists from visiting popped back Hongkong. What do they expect client! for their money? Dinosaurs?
C
*
I must stop right here, for if A speaker at the Chamber of I were to pass on in these Commerce meeting suggested that columns the blessed load of
that musBY, fussy, wonderful nest of truly under which anybody mentioning outstanding, outsmoking, out- a law should be put into force humour, from the word "Depression" should piping and outsmiling charac elthor be deported or have his ter, it would squeeze the Stock At Happy Valley. this week, a salary. cut. Wouldn't that bei Exchange, the Sporting, the golfer killed a sparrow in flight, rathor rough on the Director of Ethiopian-yes, even the di-
the Observatory?
vorce news from this issue. He got a birdfo!
D
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