1934-06-15 — Page 18

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The

FRIDAY,

NOTES OF THE DAY

THE KURAMoto affair··

1

1934.

WHAT ARE YOUR PET MEANNESSES?

By C. J. CUTCLIFFE-HYNE

The Very Idea!

LOVE IS BLIND

By Eddie Kelly, Paralytic

He met her at the talkies: They went for little walistes, Got married. Now the 'storkies Keep them home, to mind the equawkton.

The termination of the Kuramoto affair must have brought a sigh of relief to Nanking, while a tos close onquiry into the feelings of the brigade Japanese direct-action

REGULARLY once a week some-1 many miles does my indy's Rolla undesirable. R would perhaps

one says to me, Lend mo log off her 46: 6d. Add wear and Fortunately, there were cool heads your penell half a minute, and 1 tear of tyres and other things, in Japanese counsels and perhaps reply, "gorry, can't. It's on a chauffeur's wages, and so on, and a ahrowd stapleton among those chain made fast to my watch-you arrive at a pretty heavy over- well acquainted with Mr. Kura guard. So I am one up on the head charge to be entered against moto that the denouement might thrifty man (or more usually that saving of 10d, on the appear exactly as it did--and a woman) who collect pencils. My eggs. But would the dear coul attitude was pursued long pencils are not valuable, but I grasp that? Not for one moment. waiting enough

ugh to prevent officials from hate parting with them.. Sticking The utmost she would ever riso looking foolish. It was just na to my own private poncils is one to would be a "Well, I had to tako woll for peaceful ralations, nover-

of my cherished meannessen, the car for a run, anyway," which theless, that Mr. Kuramoto's desire

I don't steal pencils, as (for ex was skating on the edge of-well, to commit suicide was not trans-ample) 'I automatically annax prevarication. Inted into action There seems to boxes of matches unless the nig It is a curious thing, "the sales recently. be a lesson in the affair if one

gardly owner stops me. Thava tha habit." Cortain manufacturing could only find it.

same distaste for another man's firms live on it. I suppose it is pencil as I should have for using a branch of the meanness habit,

BIG CAPITAL SHIPS

Hongkong Telegraph.ships when they reach the

FRIDAY, JUNE 15, 1934;

OUR FREE PORT

STATUS

On

Wavering opinions the question of retention of the Colony's free port status were expressed by Mr. S. H. Dodwell

nge

Being the reminiscences of Mr. Edward Kelly, impecunious journalist, man-shout-town, poet, libeller, misogynist, and etcetera. IT must

be all these marriages that have taken place in Hongkong

Since we wrote for you

love.

for

his tooth-brush. That is narrow but I am afraid I only know about last week, we have fallen in minded, possibly. But I am not, It at second-hand. It seems al- moralising; I am merely recording most exclusively a woman's fad, ilema in the cult of meanness My own (slightly) auperior sex is

We fell so hard harlasically free from it.

The most popular shooting man Miranda that we're bruised

Great Britain, who died the all over. other day, was

But you should better known for

I NEVER BUY MATCHES

Grecian nose-

gun here again." This good fellow had a big part- No-no! Ha! Ha!) Her neck is ridge and pheasant shoot round his like a swan's (You must come up house in England, and a 6,000-

Parliament's manifest interest in Italy's decision to lay down the keels of two 36,000-ton battleships is not far to seck. Although every recent development sevins to aug. 1. have not, for instance, the Rest that the 1985 naval conference smallest scruple in using a match will be empty of results, the Ad-I have not paid for. In fact, buy one little pet meanness than for see her bruises. miralty has not abandoned hope. ing matches is one of the things all his manifold acts of hospitality Italy's new 35,000-tonners may

I don't do. My household pur-land kindness,

She has eyes that twinkle complicate matters seriously, for it

chases matches or ought to and He was one of the few hosts I is clearly the intention of the

(Go on, British Government to revive

in Incredibly mean with them know who told his guests, "I don't like diamonds. its

Where the store is hidden is a nsk you to pay my keepera, and Eddie, tell me more about arguments for limitations in size black secret kept by the distalt ghillies, and loaders, and beaters. as well as of numbers, and to urge side. I am not supposed to penet-1 give them adequate wages my-

diamonds!) Her lips into- maximum tonnage of 25,000, rate into their fastneunes, but os-self. If you interfere with this xicate us (Love and XXX). with guns not exceeding 12 inches. Two new shipe in Italy would give casionally I ancak in, find a match financial arrangement and push Her teeth are like pearls (No, a fresh lease of life to the 35,000-ard, draw from it as and when tips on them, they'll get the sack.

Pearl's-Mabel's!) Her Lonners and apoll the argument in required. With luck I get away and you won't be asked to let off favour of smaller craft which fare. They generally drop on the with this for a week; but that is would rest largely upon cheapness leakage faside three days, and the In replacement of existing battle-hider-hole is changed, and the

hunt on again. It is a hard world for those

acre grouse moor with caper and dad seize us some time. Dean!} When I am at home during the roe ground adjoining in Suther- Her- who are content to kill with the winter I can amoke a chain of landshire. He hated going to minimum of expenditure..

pipes all day and never use other people's shoots, and his joy match. Long envelopes make ex- in life was to have constant parties rellent spills, and the trifle that on his own territory. And very must be distinct asset to the proud he did 'em, and so say all of British collier fails to worry me.

un who went. But What does a ton of coal matter Well, he had just the one fall- if can economise on a box of ing, that have already hinted at matches?

He always ran out of enrtridges Summer weather (not summer,by lunchtime, or, the stuff was time) rather defeats this acheme, coming his way. I've known it to but if one insists on the luxury happen by the end of the first of having a fire at which to light drive. His solemn-faced loader a spill, one must submit to a trifle would come up to you, and "Please, the other night. of sweltering.

sir, could you lend the master a No, I do not use patent lighters.handful of

We were proceeding fine when cartridges? We've They either smell of petrol or are shat more than we bargained for." the driver stopped the car. short of it. Besides, using them. HE WON-AND LOST. hardly seems playing the game for a man whose

hobby is being thrifty One humorist bet the rest of us with matches.

once that he wouldn't be called on An acquaintance of mine is one to subscribe a second time. We So Britain is to embark upon a of the most generius women that took him, and he won. Our excel- gigantic programme of air force ever happened. 1 am always lont host shot with a twelve-bore development. Six hundred first chary of admiring

of her

THE LAST WORD

་

to

Mr. Winston Churchill had give the raud a final stirring before capitulating. There isn't a doubt that the issues raised in his charges against Sir Samuel Hoare and Lord Derby warranted a close investigation, but the inquiry com- ploted, and complete exoneration reported, Mr. Churchill might have let the matter res1. He will, of at yesterday's meeting of Hong-course, he forgiven. His pencliant kong Brewers and Distillers, for schoolboy exercises among the

Expressing the view that

mare's-nesta is well known and

Ltd.

was

understood,

AIR RACE

to me.

Editor's Note: Don't you think you'd better stop!

Eddie's Note:-

That's funny. She said the very same thing.

It happened when we took her out to Repulse Bay in a taxi

"What'n the heck!" we said.

"Missie say 'stop,'" said the driver.

"Drive on, she wasn't talking

When we asked her why, she rashid she was being chaste.

They

it is questionable whether tradi- tional policy should be rigidly adhered to. he later #t pains to point out that he was not advocating abandonment of that policy, but line machines, twenty new e-possessions, as the odds are, if I gun. So did all the rest of us. to you," we replied.

The joker, when called upon by the When we got out to Ropulse that he merely desired the mat-sonnel are to be the first moves in

dromes and a vast increase in per- do, she will promptly present it host's lander for a loan of am-Bay, she ran all the way up from

munition on the drive but one ter to be investigated thorough the game, for once begun, we shall She is, and always has been, before funch, said, "Certainly, but the beach to the hotel. ly. What are the circumstances always be struggling to keep up a rich woman. She has never had I've on got sixteena, and I'm

with whatever nations choose to any financial reason for buying in afraid they're no use." which create any doubt on the set the pace. After that it will the cheapest market, but looking weren't, of course, and so he drew issue? They are, according to only be necessary to construct gas at the matter impartially I should from 13. But I failed to see that Dodwell, two in bomb shelters in every other street say she has made that one of her lad at any more of our gallant

will host's shooting parties. and to supply the entire civilian chief life interests. She surrounding

population with masks for the tramp miles of streets to get country to become thoroughly air-material two-pence a yard chea

Why is it that a man who will go out of his way to stand a £5 per; she spends an hour a morn-dlaner to couple of his friends ing telephoning for grocery quota cannot restrain himself from cadg- tions, and the address of 8-cuting a three-ha'penny stamp from price face powder merchant is the cach of them? I don't know. But most acceptable Christmas gift you it is a statistical fact that even the can offer her.

Mr.

conscious,

-WILL OF MASSES

number-the of the Colony with the barrier reefs of high tariffs, and our | dwindling entrepot trade. Tariff impositions by neighbouring countries are not, however, any "The core of the American tradi- thing new, although admittedly Tugwell, is to be found in a kind tion," according to Dr. Rexford they were never so high as at of defiance to fate." Dr. Tugwell;

HER OVERHEAD CHARGES. present. Hongkong's free port who is either a smart young man Last time I saw her she was status, which Mr. Dodwell con-ig job or a fearful bogey-man being driven off to a country town cedes has been fully justified in pending on the point of view, made dozen eggs.

laws and cloven feet, de-

seventy miles away to buy four the past, is based on its peculiar this remark before the American

"My dear." she said, "I ace in trifting Washington. He was trying to

with claw

most open-handed of humans have a curious streak of meanness in them somewhere, and on the dis- taff side the most generous of them has usually two.

You know what the 23- terisks menn as well as we do, so don't get coy with us, If you peeple who read this column would only stop leer- ing and remember that this is our bread and butter, wo : could cut our job down by half.

.

{

It's funny what supreme The funny part of it is, they aro optimists modern girls are. nearly always concerned with

I suppoke we must looking on the bride side. When position as a distributing centre. Society of Newspaper Editors in the paper they're only eightpence ter. that do not mat. Miranda, for instance, is always a position which has not been make clear that the administration hapeny a dozen there, and my all be equipped with our private we are out with Miranda, we try changed by the fact that China welcomes criticism, and that saw grocer here wants elevenponce, famusements, or this machine-mag and avoid the subject of wed-

acon-

has raised her tariff walls. The volume of our exports has un- doubtedly decreased as sequence of the higher tariffs, but the adoption of preferential duties by Hongkong would do nothing towards the recapturing

attempt nt regimentation of Ameri can life is defiance of the will of the masses would be foredoomed to fallure. And, in his remark there is a shrewd appreciation of a fundamental part of the charac ter of the people-a part which both radicals and conservatives

end to overlook.

for

J

of lost trade. On the contrary, THE TEST the effect might very well be to curtail our exports even further The people, au a whole will not still. The only possible argu-and coerelon cannot make them. do what they do not want to do, ment which can be put forward They can be fooled, but not In favour of preferential duties long. They have ultimately

saving irreverence for authority. is that they would protect local

Hore ia an excellent point to keep industries from competition. in mind. It makes the terrors of If we are to judge from Mr.

Communism, Fascism, and so on Champkin's remarks, however,

much less terrifying; for all such schemes must, sooner or later, the Colony's newly-established receive genuine popular endorser brewery stands in no need of ment or ran their keels upon the such protection, for he pointed hard rock of stubborn contrariness Fout that the only embarrassment saying that in the end the honest -which is just another way of which the Company feels is not | wish of the majority will prevail. the finding of adequate markets, |

but the impossibility of keeping sult would be a gradual fritter- pace with increasing demands ing away of our free port status, - for the Company's products. accompanied by inevitably, in- We are Taking a broader view, however, creased living costs. the case for protection locally is living in unusually depressing shorn of much of its power from we may be tempted into experi- times, and the danger is that the fact that we are not in any ments detrimental. to the large sense a producing centre. Colony's best interests. The Moreover, onco a concession were Colony has been built-up on its made to one industry, there transit trade, and any step which would be insistent demands from free flow of commerce must be threatens to interfere with the

smaller concerns. The not re-

viewed with misgiving.

world would not be auch which is robbery. Bye-bye.'

Petrol's 18. 5d. a gallon. How pleasant place to live in.

ding, Bells remind us too much of bills. You might be un-

"I never miss a domestic science lecture, but I come home and do everything just as I've always done."

Unaware: the last thing girly take off at night.

of the fact, but the last time we were married, we had. a nightmare. We dreamt that we were married to our wife. Sereuming loudly, we woke up, and found that it was true,

We divorced her shortly after- wards. A chap named Glaxo Was the co-respondent. You must have scen the story of news- our divorce in all the papers. Street hoardings and. posters screamed out the sen- sational news:—

GLAXO BUILDS BONNY BABIES

Anyway, there's more than one pebble on the beach. Áa a matter of fact, when Miranda fell in love with us, we didn't get a pobble. We got a little | boulder.-

Sorry we must leave you now. Don't take us too seriously, girls! Our free nights are Mondays, Wednesday and Frim days.

As our last girl friend said: "I'll be sueing you!"