1934-06-08 — Page 6

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Hongkong Telegraph.

FRIDAY, JUNE 8, 1934.

THE FUTURE OF THE COLONY

held.

FRIDAY, JUNE 8, 1934.

NOTES OF THE DAY FASCINATION

POLITICS IN INDIA

It may safely be inferred from the Government of India's with- drawal of the pronouncement of proscription against the CongrCNA Party that the political situation

THE

CRIME

By ANTHONY ARMSTRONG

OF The Very Idea!

bas greatly improved, despite the subject of crime, as deall thoft had been discovered. The reappearance of Swaraj na a poll- with to-day in detective game at once became overcrowded, tical programme and condemna-stories, "thrillers," and plays but whether some peculiarly sub- possesses a popularity and fascin- tle and strong-armed fellow man- tlon of the White Paper proposals, ation that many a film star might aged to acquire every sheep in the Hint that such netion, was under well envy.

tribe, or whether atealing became consideration was given, of course, Nor are there any signs that this so popular that the wretched sheep whon the Congress leaders were popularity is on the wane; indeed, began to suffer from nevor being permitted to hold the conference the number of "those who has able to spend more than one night re-establishing the Swark Party their Wallace read" increases in the same place, history does not relate. Anyway, by the time without any attempt at emelal in yearly, and even Cabinet Ministers effective stepa in the way of laws terference. The dropping of civil ashamed to say in public that they curb the universal enthusiasm for and captains of Industry are not and penalties had been taken to disobedience and

other modifien- often like to curl up with a good the new invention, everyone was tions in the activities of Congress thriller. To confess to an cajoy- at heart a potential thief. But may be attributed in part to

ment of crime fiction has even Gandhi's experiences as the cham- highbrowlam. Those of the in-

nowadays become a new form of perhaps I digress.. plon of the Untouchables. Caste telligentsia who some years ago violence can hardly have failed to would almost sooner have been The point is that deep down in- have had some influence upon his caught laughing at something in alde, we all love crime because we political philosophy. Democratic "Punch" than ronding The Clue | are potential criminals, and since of the Twisted Goldfish," now the barrier between love and hate much forms conuot amount to

openly wallow in finger prints and admittedly a frall one, we are where socini stratification ia bloodstains on the printed page.ll potential detectives as well. full of cruelty.

"You know, one really gets quite Whether these instincts are allow fascinated with the stuff," they to take a more practical form will say. "It takes one out of depends on circumstances. The opportunities for embarking on a career of detection are limited, and while the opportunities for Indulg

are nearly always ing in crime present, so, too, is the probability fun in that. of getting caught-and there's no

POPULATION PREMIUMS

do

The highly original suggestion of Senator Tydings that popula tion be taken as the yardstick for calculating the defence needs of the nations bears a semblance of

oneself."

of form

tho

FROM BAD TO VERSE

By Eddie Kelly, Shortfellow Having retired now from the two hardest Jobs of our life-writing dally for the "Very Iden", and village blacksmithing, we think It Is fairly safe to tell you some. thing about our life as "The Village Blacksmith."

Wo were rather a brawny chap in our time, with arms liko iron bands and a voice like brass bands. As a matter of fact, the villagers used to en us a mighty man.

It was the same with our Editor when we ran the "Very Idea" Wa man--sometimes we might do the job, lost our job as a 'humourist because the Editor thought we were a mighty and then again we mightn't.

Our poor wife died of psittacosis, otherwise known as parrot's discase.

If you were to ask us did she havo any last words, we would reply, "Yes, all of them": however, as you haven't asked us, we won't go into the matter. Our three daughters were all named after flowers.

There was Geranium, the eldest, while we show them. Then there was who used to sit on the horsea' chests Petunia and Snapdragon,

We were flinging horse over the fence one day when a goofy-looking bird wandered in and said that he wanted his nail-file retreaded,

We got talking after a while, and we found out that his name was

Longfellow. He said he was a poet by trade, and that the postry business had gone to the dogs.

It had, in fact, gone from bad to verse.

Now, no one can deny that the discovery on page let alone in real life of Sir William Murgat royd on the library floor with half his face removed by some blunt So we take to exercising our turbs the polac of even the most covers of a book, or from the tip- Instrument, cannot help but discriminat Instincts within phlegmatic; but the real fascing up seats of a

When he said it had gone to the theatre. It is al-

dogs, wo pricked up our cars, and tion is not that it takes you out of most FI

sublimation. asked him if he had written the poem yourself but that it, no to speak. So far from Inciting to wrong- about "Who's afraid of the Big Bad takes yourself out of you doing, crime plays and novels are Wolfe." He said, "No", us he didn't other words, it releases tho possibly an effective safety-valve; own a dog, and, besides, he couldn't potential criminal in you. For wed, no doubt, are equally helpful and any word to rhyme with Kowloon are all potential criminals: the A preventing the scene of even ther summons

"If you like, though," he said, "I'll short of requirements, for white thing is so deeply implanted in smallest barglary being overrun by nah off a line or two about your- self. It bo goed publicity for you." Well, we told him he could have a wrong. He said we loved to hear our stab at it, but that fellow got us all daughters sing at church. That we used to actually go to church to listen to then..

Say, we ask you! Geranium, we'll admit, had had a fair volcoho was 4

caricatura

dull,

*

occurred after

Previous to been invented-not

Dur-

simplicity, that is deceptive. The scheme, briefly, is to set an armas ments standard for the first half- million and allow every nation to build on that standard up to the total of its population, with a de- elining ratio for every half-million after the rat. It is obylous. at once, that the plan would fall far

IA to be

a flood of amateur detectives. almost would be possible to allow, say. Ho instinct.

primitive!

The most harmless of little men many hundred tons of warships

It originally sprang into being, the 5.10 is not Thompkins, of The rending a book in a corner seat of It is noteworthy that many of per million of population, the dis-

As far as I remember-the actual Laurels: he is at the moment tribution of naval tonnage among the suggestions put forward attrib

incident, of course, was before "Blackninsk" climbing along the warship categories would still fur- the annual meeting of the Hong-nish plentiful controversy. Then my time with the expulsion of roofs at midnight with his pockets kong Chinese Chamber of Com-again, it is impossible to believe of Eden. The first murder, the in pursuit--and he is having the Adam and Eve from the Garden full of stolen pearls, and the police merce, with a view to hastening that France would accept the pro trade recovery locally, are based position, with her population of it theft, the first lie, all the time of his life. He doesn't know soprano, and was always in demand on a conception of the Colony's 40,000,000 compared with Ger- things that keep life from becom-whether he will be caught or get for the Philharmonic. But the other future which is in rather sharpmany's 60,000,000. A

ing yardstick

the away, but whichever it is, he two used contrast to that traditionally that sets a premium on fecundity evacuation of the Eden property knows It won't be for a hundred they only hummed. We chuld knock frighten the horses f Hitherto, Hongkong has likely to commend itself outside instend of strategic needs is hard-

this,

crime had not and fifty pages yet, as he is only out better tunes the bellows. And

even the halfway through the book." been regarded as little other the United States, even if the smallest of small lies, or Adam Ing that period he will be cunning, het been a blacksmith you'll know ns for going to church... if you've than a distributing centre for trifling fact, that it would give and Eve might well have attempt desperate, daring, will make an ill-week that a man can get a bit of that Sunday is the only day in the the South China markets, and in America the largest fighting ser-

ed to establish a water-tight alibi gotten fortune--may even shoot a exercise. consequence of the lessened vices in the world was overlooked

for original sin. All that stuff movement of goods, its trade has by Senator Tyding.

came later, and the first criminals, does that, he knows he will be since get a job as a foghorn on a policeman or so. Though if he As a matter of fact, Petunia has naturally suffered. Some of the

by the way, must have been ex-caught, ceptional people, almost in the somehow rubbed out in the end.

shot, self-poisoned, or lighthouse, and is doing well. She proposals advanced at the Cham-

writes to same class as those unknown

us regularly, enquiring ber meeting envisage the Colony

about the church and one thing and geniuses who first thought of the as something more than a mere

another, and sends us n brace of wheel, or the drinking-cup, or the clearing-house, aiming rather at M. Barthou comes forward at sling.

seagulls every now and then, ita development along industrial last with concrete proposals for lines. There can, of course, be facilitating the work of Disarma-

Well, well, well The Editor has no questioning the point that ment Conference His resolution Hongkong might, with advan-lines and promises this much at is framed on eminently practical tage to itself, become much more least, that the delegates will get of a producing centre than it down to work instead of arguing now is. The future may, in in a loose general debate. Two in- fact, show remarkable expansion fluences seem to have stirred the in this direction. But doubts French leader to action, a naturally arise as to whether the Geneva, and Mr. Henderson's nun- prospect of Germany's return to present time is propitious for branching out in this new field ent summary of the feeling of nearly all other governmental dele of endeavour. It is easy to gatea in regard to France's ob visualise the growth of factories,structionist tactics. and to plead for Government

help in the way of special facili-

BARTHOU PRODUCES

ties for the acquiring of land | FRANCE AND GERMANY for such purposes, but all this

*

we think we'll also depart.

Marvellous how one's enthus- lasm for work peters out in this hot weather. Well, if it doesn't Peter, it Pauls. (Biblical quota- tion).

Off to bed now, children.

*

*

Law and order must triumph in A crime-novel, unless the hero is How superior the first liar. say, the type of criminal who steals must have felt himself to the other from the rich to give to the poor, left the office at last. That man is and more innocent folk around or for some other acntimental rea- RO auspletous about us that ho stards curred that there could be such away with it in print. As Leacock finished our job. As there's no ene him, to whom it had not yet. oc-son, and in always allowed to get over our shoulder until we're almost a thing in the world as a nis- once said: "Its name's on the else left whom we can't knock stiff, statement of plain fact! It inust title page; you can't kill him!” have given the first thief, for in- In real life it doesn't always work stance, quite a sense of creative out like that you try it and see: real achievement to discover that by especially if you get caught after night and transferring a dozen of before you have time to give to the the simple process of going at having stolen from the rich and his neighbour's sheep to his own poor. And if Thompkina does get folds, he thereafter had a dozen caught in the lust chapter it more sheep; while his simpler doesn't worry him. Probably he minded neighbour was bitterly has switched over already to the that since

P.S.-You will all be sorry to learn lamenting the amazing "Mystery detective's end of the game; but things

Writing the above two Tha of the Disappearing Sheep," and even if he hasn't he doesn't have returned suddenly, and

Editor WA have was completely unable, in his own to do time for the next seven passed away, greatly mourned. The undeveloped criminal state, to ne-years; he embarks on Another village hearzo was decorated pre-supposes a readiness on the If there is a genuine prospect of

count for the phenomenon. career of crime as soon as he can made a publie holiday, and a good flaga and bunting, the occasion was part of those with capital to France and Germany gotting to-

Later on, of course, many other get to the library. come forward and initiate new gether again, as M. Barthou Rint-people began to catch on to the Perhaps this time the potential

time was had by all. ventures. Is that spirit pre-ed, and as the Sagr Agreement racket, and the community sudden detective in him will come to the valent, and is there reason to confirmed, it would be the bestly realised that a new thing called

(Continued on Pope 7) think that financial backing for thing that could possibly happen any large-scale development at Barthou threw the door wide open in the present critical stage. M. the present time would be and was careful, to reaffirm that available? These are pertinent Germany will re-enter the portals questions, which go to the root of the conference on a basis of of the whole question. One complete equality of rights. As further aspect of the matter is Germany feels well satisfied with that whilst really worthwhile the Saar proposals and as Herr industrial expansion may be

Hitler has insisted, again and worthy of future consideration, again, that the Saar alone affords

an issue any movement which would re-

of contention between France and Germany, Geneva may sult in the perpetuation of wolf feel justified in breathing a sweated labour is not deserving little more freely.

OUR

OF

of encouragement. The lesson

HALF-PRICE

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LANE, CRAWFORD, LTD.

to be drawn from these consider-

ations is that Hongkong should FUTURE FLIGHT

at the moment proceed warily in

the matter of industrialisation. Prof. Augusto Piccard, the Eventually, side by side with its dauntless Belgian who flies into continuance as, a distributing lieves that man may some day the stratosphere for recreation, be- centre, the Colony may develop solve the problem of interstellar along new lines, but with the travel and make round trips to the China markets obstructed by excessive tariffs at the moment, progress in this direction must be slow. One suggestion put forward at the Chamber meeting

moon or to some of the planets. It is his notion that this may be come possible, not through the use of rocket engines or by firing huge projectiles from gigantic guns, but through discovery of the secret of

is worthy of support, namely, disintegrating matter. He says

the formation of a permanent that the disintegration of 120 Consulting body, consisting of pounds of lead, for instance, European and Chinese bankers, provide ample energy for

would merchants and industrialists, to trip from the Earth to the planet or it round exchange ideas periodically on Mercury. His theory sounds, un- the economic position of the doubtedly, rumarkably like a pipe Colony and to explore ways and scientists, no less than any other dream, and it probably shows that menns of improving local trade.mave moments in which their No better time than the present, when business is sluggish, could But it makes a nice picture, and be chosen for initiating such a whether well-based or not, it is movement.

something to look forward-to-

Imagination rune a trifle wild.

-"This is my daughter Juna-sha's just at the awkward ́ngo":

with

It is believed that we died as the result of a cold, caught while Klacing draught horses.

Old Casper, when interviewed, said that it was a famous victory for the draught horses. He also said that if we had sat in the sun telling lies |to our daughter, Whilhelmine, instead of fooling around with draught horsea, our funeral would never have oc curred.

Seeing that we never had a daughter called Whilhelmine, we consider this most unsporing. Anyway, if we did have a fld anything like that brat, we'd put ground-up glass in her por Tidge.

You can't get really fond of a chikl that's always bowling skulla aliout the place. The whole family was inclined to be a bit morbid.

Casper's son, Casperblanca, was the village idiot who went away to sca and set fire to the boat. The mutt then stood there on the burning deck whon all but he had mado a bolt for the open spaces.

Which reminds us; just before he left the village, Longfellow wrote Another poem. Something Wke this:

'Twas evening, and the extting sun

Wan sinking in a log When a big, brave policeman laddio,

Espied a little dog

The _deo, it had no muzzle,

The policeman's stop prow faster, "I'm going to gain promotion,

With a summons for its master,” "Why, the pup may have the reblog,

I wouldn't put it post it,” So they fined the desperate criminat

Do you wondor, he said ..

For the life of us, we can't remem ber what the owner of the dog said. It was something that rhymes with "past it". We must ask Longfollow When we see him. That will be all' until next Fridny.

Come down to the family vauli and see un, somë time,