1933-03-14 — Page 18

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THE HONGKONG HOTEL GARAGE

Stable Boad

The

Happy Valle

Hongkong Telegraph.

TUESDAY, MARCH 14, 1933.

THE JEHOL COLLAPSE

TUESDAY, MARCH 14, 1933.

THE HARLEQUIN CAP

By

ERNEST WARD

And now Jardinel

The Very Idea!

FAMILY HISTORY

made abundantly clear that if the Chinese seek to wrest back the lost territories, Japan will not hesitate to extend her opera- tions into China Proper. In- deed, she already appears to be

By Edward Kelly, the Younger preparing the public for such a

"Whatever else you are or may, held, great captain-could quell contingency. In that event, war be, you can't be a Harlequin un-, a turbulent crowd at Canterbury

The gld man ain't feelin' well. would most likely break out on less you are a thundering good with a smile and "be generous to to-day. Poppa went along to the a far larger scale than that cricketer. And this doesn t neccs. Mr. Fry; he was only cias.ng nia V.R.C. on Saturday night, and hitherto witnessed, with

sarily mean that because you"are hat.” pos

The Old Guard in the "Holy of something he ate there must have disagreed with him Ho's had a sibilities which the Powers merely a good cricketer you will generally might not be able to ipso facto be made a Harlequin." Holles" at Lord's, knew a thing or splittin' headache ever since.

"And that's that," says H.. E. two when they appointed, Jard.ne

Pop reckons that blood is ignore. The future trend of Pawell-Jones in his "Famous to the Australian Command. Here thicker than water, so that's why events, therefore, depends on Cricket Clubs." Hia college they had not only a thundering I'm doin' his job to-day.. two circumstances firstly, China's intentions in regard to the seized territories; secondly, the precise nature of Japan's real aims in China. Until these have become more clarified, it will be idle to speculate further on the situation..

Silver on the Whirligig

,

good Harlequin, but one steeped in the rich tradition of the beauti.. fal, Winchester matto-the in-

Trouble is, blood is thicker than water alright, but it wasn't water Pop nie on Saturday" night.

The Old Man often gets these

English might not get him a pas from "," but the idiom is thers all right...

Douglas Robert Jardine has visible armour for resisting every that something beyond the gift of species of fne.

What a lot behind that phrase thendering, good cricketer-the mere transmission of genius. H of Jardine'a: "It's difficult to keep attacks. Generally just after the we see beginning of the month, before is not the mirthless Scot that he silent!" It is, when has been drawn. He knows all columns of bunkum about "body- the shroffs have collected their

Hereditary, he calls 4. about the code of I Zintar-"Kep line" bowling. The batsmen. in- issue.

know about it being

your promise: keep your temper; stead of expecting to be spoon-All we

fed with long hops and half-hereditary is that his old man died

Light." And then Jardine is also in Butterfly (magenta, black, and

violet).

gr:aland."* -

one day, and both the snake and gran'-pop died within five minutes. Gran'-pop. had been used to snakes all his life, but that was the first time he ever met a real one. The snake died from al- coholic poisoning.

coast of Brittany and other places where they made wine, plundering the heretics, and capturing the Spanish galleons, which he and his crewsaders quickly drank

Our ancestor was the kind of. chap who liked wihe, woman and xong, so long as the wine and song were good, so just before he left on his lust trip, he got married.

*

keep your wicket up."

We can see him now in one of volleys outside the off stump,from snake poisoning,

"He tried to shoo off a brown and Few economic phenomena are the War years, before he was should take the middle and leg

som guard and give the bowler 'n eight yellow snake, with pink stripes, more fascinating to watch than sk'pper at Winchester, in the treatment that the whirligig Red Cross match on Mitcham of the wicket...

And why this set against the of time has accorded to silver. Green-loveliest and truest of alli

its bold In the middle, ninetics the village green pitches-tripping Harlequin cap with United States was rent in twain gaily across the roadway from the quarterings of buff, blue, and crimson? The cap is the "most club house. over the silver

Cherished of Oxford "decorations." question, The khaki-clad crowd any in

Lionel Palairet-the Bryanites wished to link silver this member of "Paddy's Bables,"

greatest with gold. This is bimetallism.ns the schoolbovs were dubbed his to an almost colourless shade; Our genealogical trec

stylist ever. bar Ranji-has worn.

Great gran'-pop was the same. almcst Gold took fright and gradually classic-the straight bat, the firm Plum Warner, we all know, sleeps withered away in his time, simply flowed to Europe. The effect right foot, and the awing of the his. But it has been left to because it wasn't watered. Grent" was to make the silver agita- brdy were all there. And Jardine to make the cap immortal gean-pop used to drink his neat. tion even stronger. To-day the laughed when the umpire told in cricket history.

You'd be surprised how far back Maybe the hostility to mixed

we can trace our ancestors. Dür United States is, with France, im that he would be greater then!

colours can be traced to Austra-first ancestor was a Crusader. the stalwart of the gold stan-his century-making Oxford enver dard. Britain is on a paper, or, nor of Fetts. That umoire illa's indigenous instinct for uni-Ho craisaded up and down, the now patting himself on the back. form. Stoddart, long years BXO to put it better, a general com-

What is there in Winchester at-attributed the barracking that he modity, standard. No longer mosnhere that makes for ara experienced to 1. Z colours (cap can it be said that there isn't cricket captains? John Shute and blazer)-Black. Red, and enough gold in the United States long years are at the Oval had the Gold: the Arabic symbolism"Out for currency purposes. The finest County side that we ever Darkness, through Fire, into total is nearly half of the world's assembled: in the latinet

("Shrimp" total monetary stock. This is Levacon-Gower not to say that silver lias ceased cricket and now the aurust Pre

Let's hope that at Adelaide to have any adherents in the sident of Surrev was the mos

astule captain that ever Ox or "o-day he will reproduce an old United States. Silver is in the brasted he never will let out of Lord's study in caps-Harlequin marrow of the West. Yet the the bag the cat of inspiration that before lunch; Butterfly after For seven whole years he roam- cry for "free silver," "16 to 1," made him put G. O. Smith into the lurch: Zingari after tea.

ed the sens, and wherever he went But how and other variants of the silver side the last thing on that Min-

slanderous to mix his fame spread. Then the | Zíngari and Ten..

Heretics, as they were put under agitation are relatively subdued, av at Lord's in 1876.

It smacks of "Alice in Wonder-torture, would ask each other,. being more a focus of a general beloved Jack Mason of Kent-

"Who is this man?" And someone grumble about money conditions great bat; great bowler.

would reply, Honi Soit Qia Mal than a specific remedy for money troubles. This was proved in a re-

cestor of the famous chap who Reports of further fighting cent Senate debate. The "sil-

writes for the Telegraph" notwithstanding, it would ap-ver" senators fought again the pear that, for all practical pur-old fight, proposing an alliance in poses, Jehol has been lost to various guises between gold and A murderer puts back the clock, in an icy silence that his neigh the Bank clerks and the govern China. The only issue now in silver. But all the amendments and ten minutes give him an alibi bour has just come from them.ment officials the day he returned. were so decisively defeated that that saves him from the gallows. after a gruelling two-hour battle counsel. Furtively under doubt. is whether there..Is it appears the cause has passed That iq such stuff re plays are, with

If we could only do it the table he presscé a button, and likely to be any serious effort to its zenith. In Britain, however, in real life as

"Darling," she cried, "For seven in "Ten Minute the conversation is back at the long years you have roamed the reconquer. the province. Consilver in making converts as fast Alibi!"

wanther.

seas. You have given honour, sidering the nature of the ter- as the United States is losing

Picture the night-club proprie lory and fame to our name. Very few of us, of course, would ritory and the huge area covered them. It is not that Britain has need to use this ten-minutes, eracy tor, leaning unhappily against the Now it is my turn to do something by the operations, the Japanese so little gold. Britain has always to avoid the hangman; murder is bar while grim plain-clothes men for the honour and glory of the have surprised everybody by the,

been able to make her gold goja mistake most of us contrive to take notes of the champagne on name I call with pride my own." And, running indoors to the a very long way. The British omit. (It is a mistake, move vr the tables and compare it with the

'clock on the wall. Sce! The Kelly mansion, she returned, speed with which they have difficulty has been to stay on the that, with ordinary clo ks, we are hands turn the plain-clothes are followed by the carried through the campaign.

tild not likely to make twice). This betokens minute prepara gold standard while the change there are other errors we all int gone: and the revellers have ten Kellies she had bought for him

Iminutes in which to try to look in the economic status of other hideous indiscretions that tion and a realisation of

during his absence.

And that was the start of our folly of repeating the Shanghaipation then. Senternational to the way has replaced the lawless liquor-

nations and the absence of rules blish in the night to think of cheerful at the ginger-beer that

family | free. Ma calls it the experiment, in which an in-

Picture, too, the poor financier. family Skellyton. standard have made the United be if we could put the clock who ands, two minutes after the sufficiency of men was employ. States and France irresistible back on them! ed. But there have been other magnets for the metal. Hence

dest is concluded. that his faith You are no ordinary man If you in Paraguay Gold, Inc., would have factors operating in favour of the metallists in Britain would cannot "remember same tes to remove mountains 'before he

Did we tell you about the the invaders, principally the call in silver to the rescue. minutes of your life that you got back a penny. What does he

days when Д certain popular defections amongst

would like to have over again. da? He touches his diamond- troops whose loyalty has been where it will be one of the items ten minutes that if I were given at 12 o'clock, and walks. happily that men so adorned looked 60 Chinese Silver at the world conference, can remember so many separate spangled Time Machine, is back fim netor used to wear small side; whiskers. The new flame said shown to be of a very dubious on the agenda, will thus find them over again in a lump sum down Lombard-street, bestowing distinguished. We took no notice. character. It would seem that i the task of defending the ter supporters among people who nt this moment, I should find pleasant smiles on any widows or The man we were writing to at the

orphans he may pass. ritory was largely entrusted to grade it. The whirligig of

did more than any other to de-myself back in short trousers.

Picture, the guest at the We are moderate. We ask only moment didn't care whether wo forces whose allegiance, either time! History in all modern dinner-lable who has made a joke for ten minutes. But Greenwich were bare-faced, or covered all over with fur, so long as we enclos of Marshal Chang Hsuch-liang countries is strewn with exam-about the Divorce Courts and inds is still inexorable.

ed a cheque. or to Nanking was very doubt

Next she said that these naugh Ly little tufts made nanasome un atill handsomer. Ve wavered, like the pound, but finally remain- ed firm, a little below par. Final-

IF YOU COULD PUT THE CLOCK BACK Penge meaning "Oh, that's the An-

the

ful. This will explain their ples of the difficulty of operat disinclination to risk their livesing standard composed of two

unduly in offering resistance to of countenance when economic metals. Yet history seems out the Japanese. Now that Chang difficulties are both pressing and Hsuch-liang is out of the way immediate.

and his place has been taken by Chiang Kai-shek, chief intercat centres

on the probability

Butter to Go Farther

or otherwise of troops of known loyalty to Nanking being en- A new clement is expected in trusted with the task cif re-butter. It is not sufficien' that capturing Jehol. That task it shall be pure and sweet and would be one of considerable high in butterfats. It must immensity, and a great deal will have "spreadability." At least naturally depend on Chiang's this is what New Zealand dairy own inclinations in the matter. farmers are seeking to introduce All through the Sino-Japanese into their product in order thal troubles, he has kept well in the it may compete in English homes background, his inactivity giv- with Danish butler. The spread- ing rise to all manner of reports, ability issue is said to be a re- freely mentioned amongst which sult of economic conditions. have been stories of a secret The thrifty housewife, intent understanding with Japan. upon making her pound of butter: These rumours, however, do not spread as many slices of bread appear to have had any sub- as possible, is calling for a pro- stantial backing. Be that as it duct that will not resist a cold may, Chiang is now in control chisel when she seeks to veneer in North China, a circumstance the toast for an early breakfast. which may have an important Spreadability appears to be a | hearing on future operations. In spreading issue. Many - a view of the fact that Nanking's housewife has emitted sundry delegates at Geneva, and her ejaculations of chagrin as the spokesmen generally, have butter knife has caromed into created the impression that the bowl of 'gravy while the China will never rest until she butter, fresh from the ice-chest, has won back her lost territories, has slid into the lap of an it would be surprising were the honoured guest. Most butter Government's military leaders users desire some degree of to take no further active in- hardness, but one which shall terest in Jehol and Manchurin, not exceed, the, hardness of the On the other hand, it is being knife that has to cut it.

made on.

էլ

By Lionel Hale."

But

We

"Thought I ought to warn you, Horace, in case you are serious about Miss Wells. She's not so sure of her job here."

They had a half-holiday for all

home.

Our Ancestress was waiting on the door-sten for him.

seven

SIDE-SLIPS.

رم

ly she asked us point plank i we would grow a couple to plcäse her,

Personally we loathe the things. They may have been all right when men were stocks and frilled wafatcoats, and women in crino- lines said, "Dead, and he never called me mother," but they look - silly in plus dours. At all events. we measured our face and drew a line.

So they grew. We are not sure why the left side grew long and silky while that on the right was short and stubbly, unless it was because we were sitting all day at a window through which the sub shone, but these things will hap- pen in the best regulated families, Then the tragedy occurred. One morning, in a moment of for- getfulness, we, overlooked the Plimsoll line, and masseered one whole whisker. Remembering that she sat on the other side at breakfast, we left the one Intact and came down sideways, like a crab, in case she noticed anything. Once or twice she asked me what we kept looking at across the room, because we dare not meet her face, to face..

But we need not have troubled. Towards the end of the.meni she luoked at me thoughtfully and Baid: "Somehow those side whis- kera don't seem to suit you as well as they do Adolph Brilliantino." Three minutes after that we were fit to be seen again, or, uný- way, an fit as we usually are,

1