HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 7, 1931.
MOTOR NOTES
THE LIGHTER SIDE. advise a motor
"Now, in a case like yours, I'd Oh, dector, I can't afford a The irony of fate in New York isn" replied the ailing one.
Don't worry; just dodge them," replied the doctor.
described in the story of a man who, in an effort to encajo ai auto- mobile, trolley ear and a fire engine, was run over and killed by A hearse,
Mary had a Ford ear,
One of the speedy kind; And everywhere the front wheels
went,
The rear ones came behind,
*
Then you have been up in the
"Oh, yes.”
air p
riding it in the country and it balk ed in going up a hill. My uncle tried to make it go but couldn't, although ho spoilt a 325 suit trying I guess this is about fifty, words. The other two hundred are what my uncle said as he was walking "I simply cannot stand the toot back to town, but they are not t
to write down, "*`.
•
of a motor horn,' "Why not 1"
*
A fellow whora I hired as my chauffeur stole my ear and eloped with my wife. Now every time I hear a horn toot, I think he is coming back."
"What is a chauffeur?"
A chauffeur is a man who 'in smart enough to operate a car but too smart to own one."?
Airship or balloon?" "Neither. A motor-cur hit me." the car?!
Foreign Chauffeur (to deaf- farmer): Can you tell me vare I gid some gasoline by der automo- bile alreatty yet?"?
Farmer: Her 7". Foreign Chauffeur: "No, mine Gott, nod hay. Dia vas a modor car, not a horse."
Judge:You have testified that you saw the man's car ran over the old gentleman ?”
I'
Witness: "Yes sir; the auto was 4,11,44,N.J. I took the number be fore the car got away."
Judge: "You are a telephone irl"
Witness: "Yes sir."
Judge: Prisoner discharged."
Employer: Can you produce references from your last inaster?" Chauffeur: "In about a month," Employer: Why the delay " Chauffeur: He's in hospital."
ti
"Why do you comparé your wife with your car?"
"Because they both keep me broke."
"You must take more exercise," said the doctor to his patient.
•
#
*
And who gets the custody of
My wife. I couldn't afford to keep it and pay alimony, too."
*
*
"Mr. Cleaver, how do you a count for my finding a bit of rubber tyre in the bologna I bought of you last wook ?"!
"Madam, that only goes to show the motor car is replacing the horso everywhere."
And you say this in the picturo. of your car going at 20 miles an hour I don't see any car.”-
"Ob, that's all right. It's insido the cloud of dust,"
+
What some motoriste know about
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This motoring game is longer what it's cracked up to be,"
Why not! Speed limits too strict ?"
"No; but pedestrians are getting too careful."
*
A little school girl who was re- quired to write an essay, not ex ceeding 250 words, on the subject of automobiles, wrote as follows :-- ** My uncle bought a car. He was!
With a look of gloom in his face, Mr. Jipes was adding up the vari one amounts his car had cost him; for repairs during the six mouths it had been in his possession.
What are you doing, Joseph " inquired his wife.
Writing my auto biography be manned.
3RD FLOOR, EXCHANGE BLDG., *PHONE: 20485.
SHOW ROOM: WHITTA'S MOTOR
AUCTIONS, .
SHELL MOTOR
CAMERON ROAD, KOWLOON. PHONE: 56720
'Every drop tells
THE RED RING
FOR SECURITY
Agents:
W. R. LOXLEY & Co.,
YORK BUILDING;
Telephone: 22285.
RED RING
AND SAFETY TREAD
OILS
The Motorist who changes to India Super Tires enjoys a two-fold security,
1. The much improved safety tread grips the road and makes steering and cornering
easier.
2. He learns that the Red Ring mesus
more miles for his money that they are firm allies of his
is pocket as well as of his
comfort and safety.
INDIA SUPER TYRES
THE WORLD'S BEST.
DIFFICULT DECISIONS
10-21
By GLUYAS WILLIAMS
WHEN YOU REALIZE THAT SOMEWHERE IN THAT NEAT PILE OF LEAVES, WHICH, YOU HAVE SPENT THE AFTERNOON RAKING TOGETHER. TO
BURN, LIES YOUR FOUNTAIN PEN,
DROPPED FROM YOUR VEST POCKET
(Copyright, 1930, by The Bell Syndicate, Inc.)
'TO-DAY'S, WIRELESS
PROGRAMME.
BROADCAST BY Z.B.W. "ON
335 METRES..
PIANO RECITAL FROM THE STUDIO,
1 to 11.30 am-Stock quotations, 11.30 a.m.-Chinese programme. 12.30 p.m.-European programme. 1.30 p.m.-Weather report, local
time and Rugby Preas news"
2. p.m.-Close down.
5 to 6 p.m.-Chinese programme.
6 to 6.30 p.m.-Chinese children's
programme.
7 to 10.30 in.-European pro-
gramme of Columbia records, selceted and supplied by Messrs, Anderson Music Co.
to 8 p.m.-
Variety. Band-" A Brass Band Rehear and (Weston and Leo).The Laughter Makers.
Song “Squint Eyed Cactus i Jones."--Mack Allen (Barl- tone),
Orchestral-" Amina " (Egyption Seronade) (Lincke).-The Lon- don Novelty Orch. Orchestral Tesoro Mio" (Pu. oucci).—The London Novelty Orchestra.
Entainer" When My Lady Walk- ed in Her Garden Green." Norman Long, Orchestral King of Jazz"
Selections.The Midnight Min- strels.
Humorous Song- Macpherson's Wedding Breakfast. Will Fyfie.
Vocal Quartetto "Here We
Are." The Big Four. Duet-Hush! Here Comes the Dream Maá.."-Evelyn Griffiths and Master Charles Hawtrey (Boy and Gin Soprang). Duet "I Don't Want to Play in Your Yard."-Evelyn Griffiths and Master Charles Hawtrey, (Boy and Girl Soprano).. Pianoforte Solo-" Love Race.”—-
Billy Mayerl. Vocal Duet-" More Than You Know, "-Layton and Johnstone.
8 to 5.25 p.m.—
Cockney Suite
A Stato Procession" (Bucking- ham Palace) (Ketelbey).—Al- bert Ketelbey's Concert. Orah," "The Cockney Lover" (Lambeth Walk) (Ketelbey) Albert Ketelboy's Concert Orchestra. At the Palais de Dance" (Any- whore) (Ketelbey).. Albert Ketelbey's Concert Orchestra." "Thoughts on Passing the Ceno
taph (Ketelbey). Albert Ketelbey's Concert Orchestra..
|
#Bank Holiday" ('appy Jamstend). (Kotelbey)-Albert Ketelbey's Concert Orchestra.
8.23 to 8.30-p.m. **Jungle Drums" (Ketelbey).---AL-
bert.. Ketelbey's Concert Orch. 8.30 to 9 pm-Pianoforti Recitali
Miss L. Pecker. *** "Rhapsodie Nongroise" (No. 13),--
F. Liszt,
Tambouria Ramsau."—Godoweky- Nocturne Op. 49.”—F. Chopin, "Faust."-Gounod-Liszt,
Musical Box."-A. Lindow.. p.m.-Weather report, local time,
:ete.
0.03 to 0.40, p.1.~~
Orchestral...
"Peor Gyal Suite" (Gring).—Tre
Classical Symphony Orchestra. Memories of Beethoven."-The
Regal Salon Orchestra.
GLYPS
WILLIATE
MISSIONARY LIFE IN CHINA.
EXPERIENCES
CAPTIVITY.
Mr. R. W. Porteous, of the Chius Indand Mission, who is now in this country, tells of the experiences of himself, his wife and Miss Nine Gemmell, during their captivity. Tom March 23 to June 20 last, in the hands of Chinese Communists.
"Miss Gemmell was released after about ten days," Mr. Porteous said,
* so that “she could make
"Taneradi "--Overture (Rossiui) —known that our captors demanded B.B.C. Wireless Military Band a ransom of £12,000. Our guards Memories of Mozart."-The Regal
Salon Orchestra.
3.40 to 10 pm.
were often quite friendly, though some would come and threaten us, saying You foreign devils. To- orrow we will kill you. Some of the more friendly soldiers on one occasion brought my damaged con-
Ballad Momories-Where My Caravan Has Rested-Little Grey Home in the West- Dry Those Tears-Floral Dance" Juentin M. Maclean, 'Organist. Ballad Memories-tone in the corting and asked if I would play
Bud-She's Far from the Land it. After tying it up with tape: Maire My Girl Because."-and string I managed to get some Quentin M. Maclean, Organist sounds out of it. They asked me to "Mignon "Garotte' (Thomas),-
"Harp Ensemble..
sing in Chinese. When I told them "Moment Musical" (Schubert),
Harp Ensemble.
2,
10 to 16.20 p.m.-Experimental re-
lay period.
10.30 p.m.-Close. down.
-.
MONTHLY REPORT FOR DECEMBER:
Actual hours of transmission totalled 280 of which 103 were de voted to European programats and 115 to Chinese, as follows:-
I only know Gospel hymns, they anid, Go ahead, and, appeared thoroughly to enjoy what I sang. I remember one remarking It's no good killing these foreigners. They seem to want to die and go: to leaveninde
On another acension Mr. Porteous was able to amuse the Communista. by drawing pictures of animals His tigere, elephants, and borses so interested the men that they kept. him at the task til late in the Euro- Chi- evening. They then remarked that it was too late to kill Mr. Porteous and his wife that day but thatTM they would carry out the execution in the morning
pean met
Morning TransMISSIONS including Commercial News and Church Relays Evening Transmissions.. 112).
43 713
115
10
Total, 183
Monthly percentage: European, 3.03; Chinese, 41.07.
During the month the following fems were brouzicast ===
European Rolays, ----- Running Commentaries ..... European Studio Concerts... 5 Dance Programmes ....... Chinese Relays Chinese Studio Concerts...... Children's Programmes (European)
Children's Programmes
(Chinese) Lectures
Lectures (Chinese
10
5
The missionaries' final release was directly due to the devotion. of Mr. Chen, a Chinese teacher attached to the Miesion, and that of two other Chinese, named Yu and Hwang, who managed to reach the Communist General, Peng Teh Hwai, with a letter from Miss Gemmell explaining that the mix--- Bonaries friends could not possibly raise money themselves amounting to more than £380; but they wore willing to send 2120 worth of medi-' cal stores for the relief of the wounded. General Pong received the messengers in a friendly, mA TË - ner, and finally gave orders for Mr. and Mrs. Porteous, release.
JAPANESE GOODS IN INDIA:
HIRE A CAR TO DRIVE YOURSELF Mill-owners Association reveal
WHEN ON LEAVE
Or if you require a car for more than 8 weeks, we will supply any make new or used, with guaranteed repurchase price:
Write for Tariff.
L. F. DOVE, LTD.
tomobile.Engineers
115, Addiscombe Road,
CROYDON,
LONDON:
Figures published by the Bom-.
how Japanese goods are gaining. ground in India at the expense of Britain, b
The effects of the boycott on British goods, trade depression, and the recently imposed cotton duties. aro shown by the total of importa on cotton, piecegoods into India during October, which wro | 42,000,000. v-yards compared with
335,000,000 in October last year.
Wills Japan's proportion of the total imports into India, in October- this year was 43 per cont, comparad
trgan, the United Kingdom's thurs of piece goods imports fall, from 60 per cent, in October last year to 50 per cent, of the total in October; this year
Japan can still sell fairly freely in ports other than Bombay.
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