1930-03-08 — Page 3

HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.

Thirteen

Prospective Maid: children, ehf I'm afraid this place wouldn't suit me."

Mistress: Why, are you super- stitious 7"

"Yes," said Henry VIII. as he idly turned the pages of his fami ly album, "they were all beauti- ful; those I didn't care for parti- enlarly I've marked with an axe."

+

Diner (trying to cut his steak) ;, | Say, waiter, how was this steak. wooked?

Waiter: Smothered in onions, sir."

V

Diner: Well, it died hard."

Magistrate: But if you wera doing no wrong, why did you run when the officer approached you t

Prisoner: "I thought that 'e wanted to try and sell me a ticket for the policemen's annual con- cort!"

"Do you think your father would say anything if I told him we wore going to be married ?"

"I don't know, but I' fancy he'd say something if you told him we weren't."

Rather foolish old lady (to angler. who keeps on fishing up seaweed): "Tedious "work, getting seaweed like that, isn't it, young man i Why don't you walk along the beach, and find some nice pieces there ? "

Mistress: "So you have a situa- tion with my friend, Mrs. Long.. Mary Did you tell ber you have only been with me for two months?"

Mary: "Yes, ma'am, and she said that if I could stay with you" for two months that was a good enough reference for her."

At a wedding all went well un- til the bridegroom was called upon to produce the ring. In vain be felt in his trousers pocket. Noth- ing could be found except a hole

"Don't you think it's rather con- through which the ring had evid- ceited to say George has a tenderently fallen.

spot for you?”

|

"Not at all. · You

father 100, kicked him down the front steps last night'

Mrs. Parsons: "If woman was given the credit she deserves I don't think man would be quite so pro- minent in the world's history."!

Mr. Parsons: "Quits trus, my dear. If she could get all the credit she wanted he'd be in the workhouse,"

A man who had suffered consider- ably at the hands of a band of youthful cricketers who persisted in Bending their ball over his garden wall succeeded in catching. one of them..

"Now, my lad," he said, "I've often watched you play. You use the lamp-post for a wicket, but I notice that the batsmen never run. What is your system of scoring 1"

|

What was he to do1 Suddenly

a happy thought struck the clergy? man.

"Take off your shoe," he said. The suspenac and silence were painful. The young man removed his shoe. The ring was found, also a hole in his stocking. The clergy. man remarked, syidently with more than the delay of the ceremony on his mind:-

"Young man, it's high time you were married."

The dustman touched his hat and beamed.

"Compliments of the miss!" he remarked.

всякод,

"You probably think I'm going to give you a tip," said that maiden Indy. "I shall do nothing of the sart. Why, how dare you come here in this condition. You've been drinking. I can smell the vile stuff in your breath."

"It's one across the road," said The dustman curbed a wild de- the boy, in a trembling voice, twosire to clout her over the head with to the next lamp-post, and six over his shovel. your wall.

"Oh, no, mias, you're mistaken," "But what happens if you break, he protested. I ain't touched a window, as you did a 'minute or drop. I was brought up by French two ngo!"

folks, miss, and got French "abits. Then we all run," said there bin eating frogs' legs. What

you can smell is the 'ops, miza."

cricketer.

CROSSWORD PUZZLE.

15

17

2

12

15

16

18 19

21 122

120

24

|29|.

29

30

52

136

40

44

47 48 49

57

Horizontal

1-Animal pouch.

4-Law form of animal,

58

9,To make noise liko dovo's: "

12-Note in Guido's scale.

13.--Brother..of Romulus.

14.-A bird.

15.-Nothing.

18.-To achieve.

77,-Old.

18.-To climb.

20.-Article.

1. To act.

24-Not many.

24. Last events.

29.-Unit of energy.

30.-In Ireland, a club. 32-Brazilian coins. 34.---Anger. 35.-Mineral vein."' 38.-Fruit preserva.

30.-Old cloth measure.

40-To draw forth.

41.-Opening.

43-Spanish article.

44.-Symbol for tellurium.

15.--Ben weeds,

47.-Drinks with tongue.

60-Auxiliary seed covering.

51. Tub.

54.-Before.

6-Ta nut in row." 56.Girl's name.

07, Devil.

88.-Banners.

50. -Вогд.

Vertical,

1-Japancae coin. 2-Arab name. 3.- Berone. 4.-Debates. B.Tatervening time.

-To give. -Bisenit.

8.-While..

-Tooth of gear wheel.

18

10. To lie indebted. 11-Antique.

rl

17.-Record 19.-Belonging to. 20. To be ill. 21-Skin

10

26 27

22.-Mountain gymph. 24. Young bird. 25.-Medicinal plant. 20.-Large spoon. 27-To bombard.

-To put on, as a belt. 31.-Man's name.

13.—So, African statesman.

37.-High curd. 39.-Birds of prey.

42-Father.

45,-Tune

40.-Level.

47-Hawaiian wreath.

48.-Part of body.

4D.-"Ginger

BO-Every one. 52-Hail!

63-Golf noun.

1

35.-Africa (abbr.).

-YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.

No. 1586

CONEN BHUES CALZE ZUBLEE ARENDRELY TER ZIRATAW 253 QORXS.LVE DELRER SEALED

JEITES BONEE 217, 88AIR YES ORMAL ERISAB PAD HETER STONED-WARREN

USE

EXITS BEAND

THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, SATURDAY, MARCH 8, 1930.

H

SNAPSHOTS OF A WOMAN EATING A SUNDAE

WILLIAMS

CONTEMPLATES DELICIOUS HOT FUDGE SUNDAE WITH NUTS, WHIPPED CREAM, AND Á CHERRY

MOPS UP AND DECIDES THE THING TO DO IS TO MAKE ROOM BY EATING A LITTLE ICE CREAM FROM THE EDGE

·FEELS SHE CAN SOLVE PROBLEM BY STARTING AT TOP IN THE MIDDLE AND EATING DOWN.

CLEOPATRA'S NEEDLE.

THE VOYAGE FROM EGYPT.

"

DEATH OF MAN WHO PLANNED IT,

man

Mr. Wayaman Dixon, of Great- Ayton, Middlesbrough, the who brought Cleopatra's Needle from Egypt to the Thames Em- bankment, has died at the age of

50,

In March, 1877, the Khedive of obelish. At that time Mr. Wayn Egypt offered to England the man Dixon, who had been trained a civil engineer at Messrs. Armstrong Whitworth and Co., of Newcastle, was out in Egypt with his brother, the late Mr. Joho Dixon.'

163

The responsibility of the safe transfer of the obelisk was under taken by the two brothers, who in- herited the enterprise and courage of their father, John Dixon, who was civil engineer for the Darling, Lon and Stockton Railway.

"

An Iron Cylinder.

It was decided by the brothers that the simplest method that could be adopted for the removal of the Needle would be to allow it to re- main lying on the shore and, to construct around it a strong iron cylinder in which it could be com- pletely enclosed. Excavation, were made about the Needle, and the cylinder was gradually built up Lo enclose it.

Having carefully calculated what volume of air would be sufficient to feat the weight of the cylinder and the monolith, the Dixon Bro- thers constructed a vessel accord- ingly.

When completed the vessel was 118 ft, in length and about 15 ft. in diameter to accommodate the Needle, which was 69 ft. long, 7 ft. 7 in. wide at the base, and which weighed no less than 186 tons.

The cylinder was divided into ten watertight compartments, so that in the event of accidents to one portion the vessel might still retain sufficient buoyancy to pre- vent it from going to the bottom on ita passage across the ocean.

After considerable difficulty the specially built vessel, called the Cleopatra, was pulled, across a stretch of sand to be doated in deep water and towed to the dock of Alexandria.

(Continued on next Column.)

STARTS TO TAKE BITE, BUT. FINDS DISH IS SO FULL THAT JUST PUTTING SPOON IN MAKES IT RUN OVER.

AT PRESSURE OF SPOON

ICE CREAM SLOWLY ROLLS OVER ON ITS SIDE.

GETS OVER-CONFIDENT. AND DELUGE OF FUDGE SAUCE SUDDENLY WELLS UP OVER RIM OF DISH.

By GLUYAS WILLIAMS

FINDS IN FACT THAT FUDGE SAUCE HAS. RUN ALL OVER FINGERS.

BY FAST WORK CATCHES WHIPPED CREAM AND

CHERRY IN KER SPOON.

GETS MAD AND DECIDES TO DIG IN, LET THE DROPS

FALL WHERE THEY MAY.

(Copyright, 1936, by The Hell Syndicate, Inc.)]

DETECTIVE POSES AS A LOVER.

WOMAN COURTED TO ENTER

SECRET CLUB.

The wiles of a detective, who be came a "lover" in order to enter.

secret drinking den and gain evidence, were revealed to the Royal Commission On Licensing by Superintendent Charles Clark, of the Brixton Division of the Metro... politan Police last month.

Superintendent Clark, who said that it should not be possible for a club to be registered in the easy manner that it was, quoted the in- stance of a club, at Mitcham.

ΤΟ

"NO LIMITS" OSTEOPATHY.

CORONER AND A WOMAN'S WEATH

The registration of medical men adopted in this country for the protection of the public. So long as that is recognised, the responsi. bility rests with the public cón. corning whom they go to for medi. .cal advice."

This comment was made by the Liverpool coroner, Mr. Cecil Mort, at the inquest on Mrs. Mary ad-eight, of Plattaville-road, Mossley Lovisa Webster-Jones, aged fifty-

below," he said, "and to gain mittance my officer courted the wo- man in the shop.

-There was an off-licence down

"He was passed up on her re- commendation.

"When the club was entered on warrant it was found to be a very abominable place, and to have more drink stored there than in many a licensed house.".

Superintendent Clark's amusing evidence followed that of "Lord Byng's assistant, Mr. Norman Kendal, who laid before the cold- mission his chief's plans to deal with clubs.

Lord Byng's suggestions were :- The police should be allowed to enter at any time;

Take the names of people inside; Arrest those who refused to give their names; and

Seize books and liquor.

Mr. Kendal declared that it was Lord Byng's opinion that no inva sion of clubs would follow if such Icgislation were passed. Powers would be exercised with care..

ม่

Abandoned in the Bay..

On September 21, 1877, the Cleopatra was taken in tow by the Olga, and all went well until the Bay of Biseny was reached.

There, however, the Cleopatra and her convoy encountered bad weather, during which they became separat- ed. After six lives had been lost in an endeavour to make good the moorings, the Olga finally dhanden. ed her charge, and the Cleopatra was left to the mercies of the waves. I Later she was found by the Eng- lish steamer Fitzmaurice, and was towed by her into Ferrol. Harbour, for which service the owners re- ceived £2,000, ne salvage.

On January 16, 1878, the Cleopatra left Ferrol in charge of the steamer Anglia, and without further mishap reached London eleven days later.

BILLIE

Hill, who died after sa. illness during which an osteopathic physi- cian, Mr. Patrick Baul, of Church. road, Wavertree, was called in.

"Perfectly Satisfied."

Mr. Webster-Jones said that Mr. Saul a week before his wife's death he and his wife were perfectly satisfied with the treatment.

Mr. Patrick Saul, giving evid- ruce, said that he held the diplomu of the British School of Osteopathy, London. He was called to Mrs. Webster-Jones and found her suf- fering from a septic throat, but" other symptoms did not show. Complications set in and he re- cognised pleurity,

The coroner: I am most anxious, Mr. Saul, not to put an offensive question to you, but I am bound to put a certain question to you.. I am not clear on how far the manipulation treatment you prac tise extends What limits have you, if any 1

Mr. Saul: According to the rul- ing of our schools of thought in America, wo have no limits.

Professor's Evidence. Professor J. McFall, professor of forensic medicine, Liverpool Uni- versity, said that he conducted a post mortem examination and in his view Mrs. Webster-Jones had been suffering from pleurisy for about a month before her death, while there were also signs of peri- tonitis for over a week.

"From my point of view," he added, "her condition had been. quite neglected. There doubt about it.

was

до

The coroner: In spite of neglect, at the same time there was nothing that you know of which was done which in any way hastened her death?

Professor McFall: No.

A verdiet of "Death from natural,

causes' was returned.

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BROADCAST BY ZBW. ON

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11 to 11.30 h.m.-Commercial News. 12 noon to 1 p.m.-Demonstration

programine,

1.48 p.m.-Weather report.

7 to 9 p.m.-Experimental pro gramme during which the Gil bert and Sullivan Opera Trial by Jury "will" bo given from Victor records sup- plied by Messrs. Tsang Fook Piano Company.

9 p.m.-Overture and local football

Rewa

9.15 p.m.-Dance programme. 11.30 p.m.--Close down.

SUNDAY.

10.35%.m.-Morning Service relay-

ed from St. John's Cathedral,

12 noon to I p.m. Chinese pros

gramme.

1.43 p.m.-Weather report.

9 p.m.-European programmo of Victor records supplied by Messrs. Tsang Fook Piano Co. Le Cid-Ballet" (Massenet), Sao "Francisco Symphony Orch. Hakone Hachiri (Mountaineer Song)" and "Otosam to Boya (Where is Mother)," Yoric Fujiwara.

Molly On The Shore" (Grainger) and "Shepherd's Hey" (Grain- ger), Royal Opera Orchestra, Covent Garden.

Samson et Dallila-L'Aube Qui Blanchit (Dawn Now Heralds The Day)" and "Romeo Et

Julietto Prologue " (Gounod), Metropolitan Opera Chorus, Fugue A La Gigue" (Bach) and Toccata" (Widor); Reginald Goss-Custard, F.R.C.O.

Fanciulla Rigoletto Piang,

(Weep, My Child)" (Verdi) and Rigoletto Voglia Ó Donna (Safely Guard This Ten- der Blossom)" (Verdi), Amelita Galli-Curoi-Giuseppe De Luen." "Alt-Wien (Old. Vienna)". (Go- dowsky) and Prelude In A Minor"

(Claude Debussy), Isabelle Yaikovsky); Trio In C Major" (Haydn), Alfred Cortot-Jacques Thibaud- Pable Casals..

Ach, Wie Ist's Moglich Doan, (How Can I Leave Thee)" and

Du, Du Liegst Mir Im Her- zen (You Live In My Heart)": (Pax), Hulda Lashanski-Paul Reimers.

Etude I C Sharp Minor" (Sariabine, Op. 2) and "Etude In D Flat Major" (Scriabine, Op. 8), Muriel, Kerr Calm As The Night (Carl

Goetze) and "Tales of Hoff man-Barcarolle " (Offenbach), Lucrezia Bori-Lawrence Tib bett.

.10.20 p.m.-Close down.

COPYRIGHT. IN A SMILE.

CHOCOLATE BOX AND FILM. STAR.

A curious question of infringe- ment of the "Authors' Rights" law, passed in 1925, has come before the

Turin Tribunal. A big chocolate

manufacturer had commissioned a Milanese publisher to supply him with some series of small picture advertisements; of these the picture of a pretty, smiling girl particu- larly attracted customers. But the other day in Rome a man rushed into a confectioner's shop, seized hold of the chocolates adorned with the picture of the smiling girl, sad, waving them in the faces of the bowildered shop assistants, called" out in an angry, voice, "She be. longs to me!"

He was neither mad nor, was he the girl's husband or lover;_he proved to be the well-known Bo- man photographer, Alfredo Pinto, who had obtained the exclusive copyright of this particular photo- graph of Rina di Liguoro, the film star. He claimed damages not only for infringement of copyright, but for posible damage done to his studio-work, as many women would avoid coming to be photographed for fear of finding their likenesses "affixed to slabs of chocolate. The Turin chocolate manufacturer puts all the responsibility on the pub- lisher from whom he obtained the picture advertisements, and the publisher, on his turn, shifts it' on to someone else.

The cart is complicated by the in- tervention bf a Parisian photo. grapher, who declares that he owns the copyright of the photograph in question, A commission of experts is now being called in to decide to whom Rina di Liguoro's smile re- ally belongs.

Mother of a boy fined at Kingston ler driving a noisy motor-cycle I expect. he is guilty or he would not have asked me to come here for him.

Kingston husband: The trouble is all because my wife carrica about a puff and powder to make herwell up to go to the pictures with an other man.

QUEEN'S

Pickford

DOUGLAS

airbanks

ADAPTATION D SHAKESPEARS

together

'TAMING

OF THE SHREW

The tice of cut-Tatáẳng Comedies

Adacted and ch

SAM TAYLOR,

A 15th Century Battle in a 1930 Arena..

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