1930-02-08 — Page 3

HUMOUR: ANCIENT

"And was Mrs. Smith surprised when the found out you were leav- ing her, Cook!"

"Oh, no, ma'ani She knew..be fore I did."

Professor: "So the ship huggedċ the shore? And where WHA thore #

Student: I

the

AND MODERN.

"Why did you have only one of the twins photographed

"They looked so much alike, it was no use spending the money get- ting pictures of both."

Slow Waiter: "Have you order- ed anything, sir 1"

Diner: "Well, I asked for straw.

the hold of those it was in borries and cream, but that was

vessel."

"Mother has sent this steak back. She says it is so tough she could zole our boots with it."

"Why didn't she!"

The nails wouldn't go through.

Zoo Visitor: "Tell me, why has it got, its tusk shartened?"

Keeper (fed up with questions): "Beenuse it comes under that there reduction of armaments agree ment."

When the report got about that Rudyard Kipling was getting a shilling a word for something he was writing, some, Oxford students set about a rag. Wiring him a shilling they said. Please send us one of your words."

And back *"Thanks."

.

CAM

the answer.

"Madam, is your husband at home 1 inquired the book canvas- ser. "I'd like him to look at this book, 'What to Do in Case of an Accident."

"Just wait till I look and see," replied Mrs. Peck, grimly, "and if he ain't at home he's, going to need that book."

A famous pianist was to give a recital in, a large hall. As the an. dience was filing in a man stagger. ed up to the door and presented a ticket.

"You can't go in," said the offi. cial in charge; you are not in a fit condition."

"Didn't I pay for my ticket?" asked the man. "Isn't it in or "der ""

"It's all right, was the reply, but you-you are all wrong-you are intoxicated !"

"Intoxicated Of course I'm in toxicated! If I wasn't. do you think I'd come to a piano recital"

|

T

such a long time ago; you'd better change it to Christmas pudding."

Maid: "Oh, madam, the master is sitting rather dazed-like on the front step, with a large box beside him and a piece of paper in his hand.!

1

Madam: "Oh, my new frock must have arrived !?"

Harbara: The butcher offered me his hand this morning, daddy," Father: "The scoundrel How dare he?!

Barbara: "It's all right, dear. He tried to sell it to me with the turkey, but I made him take it off the scales."

ม่

An old bachelor who was quite Laid fell in love with a pretty widow, whose former husband's name was Robin.

One afternoon

the bachelor dropped in to have cup of tea with the widow, who, when ten was over, began to sing

Robin Adair."

The bachelor picked up his hat. "Madam," he said, “even if your husband did have hair, it's no fault of mine that I haven't."

The portly gentleman who had been engaged to sing in the musical programme following a dinner at

large restaurant was looking very enraged. He was scanning the list of musical items, and, to his con- sternation, his name had been omitted

Approaching one of the organi- zers he brandished the programme furiously, and demanded the rea

The young son of the omission. fellow whom he approached glanc- ed down at the card, then faugh. ed nervously. "Aren't you Signor Jelly, the singer 1" he asked.

"Yes," was the reply, "Well-er-your name being 'Jel- ly," said the young chap, it ap pears to have been put on the menu by mistake." *

CROSSWORD PUZZLE.

12

6.

7 18

12

13

15

17

∙19 120

21

19 110

150

132

134

135

37

38 39

40

196

47

50

56:07.

162

65

Horizontal.

1.--Napkin.

4.Musical work. (abbr.).

6. Terrible,

11. Tendency for effective action.

13.-Carrier,

15. French for and.

18.-Quieted.

18.To depart.

19,-By,

21 Vast s

22-A blow.

24.-Desserts.

28. Ancient Asiatic city_

28.—Consumed,

29. To declare.

31-Meadows.

33. -Bone.

34. To wander.

36.-Narrow opening.

38.Type unit.

40.-Hide.

42. Grub.

45,-Decr.

47. To peruse.

49-Gulding line: 50.-Girl's name

59-Bound about. 54-Plural ending. 55.-Comparative sufix.

58.-Bankruptcy.

58.-Fart of to be,

61. To mar.

63-Optical illusion.

66-Braves,

06/Thus,

67-A number.

Vertical,

1-An insect,

2-Undamaged

3,To exist.

4-To eye.

5. Turning mark, on air coure,

6-Vast deeps.

7-Very small,

6-Passing fancies.

Abraham's birthplace.

&

167

10-In 'music, smoothly. 12-Sun god. 14.-Cordi

17-Indigó. 20.-To rip, 93-Musical note. 24-Part of to be. 25-To cease. 27-Passage way. 30-Always.

32- To float, in air. 35.-Funeral songs 37. Woody plant.

38.-Blundered.

30-Anchored.

41-Caudal appendage. 43,Distinctive aspect. 44.-Article.

46-Plural ending. 48-Musical instruments. 51.--Distant.

33.-Picco for three 57. High card. 58-Comparative suffix. 60.-Humans.""

62. Musical note. 64-By.

YESTERDAY'S. SOLUTION.

LA

RAETAY

[17]M.]

ED

AT 422-BOVES ZUE

FLIT LEBS

11ZRODEONZULT

RESDUE, 101723

ROBES BATED

THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 8, 1930.

THE WORLD AT ITS WORST

· 1-10

By GLUYAS WILLIAMS

WHEN YOU DROP IN TO PAY A NEIGHBORHOOD CALL BREAKING UP A BRIDGE GAME, AND YOU INSIST

THAT THEY GO RIGHT ON PLAYING, YOU'LL COME SOME OTHER TIME AND THEY INSIST THAT THEY

WON'T HEAR OF IT, YOU MUST COME RIGHT IN

AND EVERYBODY IS MISERABLE.

(Copyright, 1930, by The Bell Syndicate, fäc.)

TORONTO BROKERS IN TROUBLE.

NINE ARRESTS.

[United Press.]'

TORONTO, Jan. 31. Directors of the Standard Stock Mining Exchange are considering a request by Mr. W. H. Price, the Attorney-General, that the exchange close for a few days until the in- vesting public recovers from the unsettling "efect reaulting from arrest of nine brokers, connected with four large houses, on charges of conspiracy to defraud.

.Mr. Price said that the investors' stocks, with collateral provided to protect marginal accounts, are be- ing held by the Government.

It is doubtful, according to the Attorney-General, as to whether in- vestors will be able to "get their money out right away."

Dumping of Wheat Holdings

Prevented...

sume

WHEN A PENALTY MAY BE AWARDED.

NINE OFFENCES PUNISH- ABLE BY SOCCER LAW.

CONSTANT APPEALS.

NEW FACES FOR OLD.

FAMOUS HOSPITAL - ENDS ITS WORK:

8,000 CASES TREATED.

Sir Charles H. Kenderdine, honorary secretary of the Queca's Hospital, Sideup, Kent, held out a set of portraits. They showed €10 of the most successful cases treated at this hospital for war- time facial injuries, which has now been sold to the London County Council to be transformed into a convalescent home for post-opera- tive caaca.

LOCAL BROADCASTING.

WEEK-END PROGRAMME.

To-day's wireless programme, broadcast by ZBW, on 353 metres,

is as follows:

(1 to 11.30- a.m.-Commercial news,

19 noon to 1 p.m.-Demonstratioa

⚫ programme.

1.4 p.m.-Weather report.

7 to 9 p.m.-Experimental trans-

mission.

a to 10.30 p.m.-European pro-

gramme. (Dance).

Dance programme of Victor records supplied by Messrs. Tsang Fock Piano Co. p.m.-Miniature Concert Party.

Dance music.

0.30 p.m.-To A Wild Rose and To A Water Lily (MacDowol),

Dance music.

10 p.m-Among My Souvenirs,

Diane (Crawford).

Dance music.

10.30 to 11.30 p.m.-Chinese · pro-

gramme.

11.30 pm. Close down,

TO-MORROW'S PROGRAMME. 10.30 a.m. to 19 noon.--Morning Service relayed from Union Church.

Programme: Voluntary; Hyman, From Thee, all skill and science ow" Prayer; Lord's Prayer Hymn, "Lead us, hea venly Father, lead us The Lesson; Children's Address; Hyms, "God of heaven, hear! our singing; Silent Prayer: Hymn, Take my lile, and let it be" Sermon, Rev. J. Fox- ter: "Offertory; Hymn, "Holy Father, 10 Thy merey"; Bene- diction; The National Anthem; Voluntary.

At end of Church Service there will be a Chinese pro- gramme until 1.p.m. 1.48 p.m.-Weather report. as-ift Eatapeai.jpkpg%.m.cn94}

Victor records supplied by Messra. Tsang Fook Piano Co Egmont Overture" (Beethoven, Op. 94), Victor Symphony Orch. Lowse-Depuis Le Jour (Never Since The Day)" (Charpentier) and Resurrection-Dieu "de Grace (Prayer)"' (Alfano), Mary

"Huldigungs March" (Wagner),

London Symphony Orchestra. "Boris Godounow - Death Of

Boris " (Moussorgsky) and

"Boris Godounow Farewell of Boria" (Mouzoigsky), Feodor Chaliapio,

At The Brook" (Boisdeffre) and

"Here is the portrait of a man [The following is another of the

Garden. way better-looking after his. series of articles being con- who tributed by Mr. Arnold Josephs, face had been mended. Major the famous referee, 10 the Gillies always said that he im-

proved this man's looks' "Daily Express". London,] Football matches have been so often won and lost by the awarding of a penalty kick that it proves how vital such awards are, and it is not surprising to find how often one meets with appeals for this award. Throughout almost every Soccer game there is at least one occasion when an appeal is made, sometimes honestly, but at other times to try the official in charge. I am always confident in my own mind, knowing only toe well how important a penalty kick may prove, that the offence has been deliberately committed before I award a penalty kick, as in the majority of cases it is almost as good as awarding a goal.

TORONTO, Feb. 1. Four out of five local brokerage

The decision whether the offence forms which were closed yesterday,

is intentional lies with the discre -following arrest of leading brokers

tion and judgment of the officials on charges of conspiracy to de-

controlling the game. Why I say fraud, were permitted to-day to re-

officials is because it is not always business under an, agree

possible for the referee to bee the: ment between a Government repre-

offence alleged to have been com-. sentative and directors of the com-

nitted, a player or players ob panies whereby Government agentstructing his view. It is then that are to supervise the conduct of

the linesmen may be called on to affairs of the Solloway Mills Co, play their part It may further the A. E. Moysey Co., the Homer

happen that by playing the "open Gibson Co. and D. S. Patterson.

formation" method that only one Chartered accountants have been

linesman is in a position to give appointed to supervise the firms'

a decision, and even then his view transactions.

may be cut off, too.

In the case of a fifth firm, the Stobie Furlong Co. the concern went into bankruptcy after the ar- rest of Malcolm Stobie and C. J. Furlong, directors of the company. A conference of all attorneys general in Canada, regarding the stock market. situation, will pro- bably be called" in a few days.

The Government will release brokerage funds tied up Thursday pending investigation of charges of unethical brokerage, proceedings, however, it was learned.

Provincial officials are co-operat. ing in an effort to prevent such unethical operations in

ture.

fu-

I know of a case where a lines mian called my attention to a most flagrant case which, as already ex- plained, was unobserved by me, and I immediately awarded a pen- alty. The offence was evidently so obvious that not the slightest com ment was made,

With regard to linesmen, Law 14 states: "If they notice any breach of the laws that has escaped the referee's attention it is their duty to inform him of it.'

The photograph was of a man' whose irregular features had be- come almost unrecognisable. was placed side by side with the of him taken after his portrait

It

it

treatment was complete, and show- ed a handsome Adonis with straight nose and regular features. Skilful Treatment.

"And he was only one of 9,000," continued Sir Charles "who had his face mended under the skilful treatment of Major Harold Gillies.

"The few remaining cases bove now been sent to Roehampton, Major Gillies is now back at work privately, mending more broken facca. I heard only the other day how wonderfully the restored the face of a woman who had it. absolutely destroyed in a taxicab accident.

"It is most satisfactory to us to know that this hospital at Sidcup, in which the Queen was so inter- asted that she insisted on having it called after ber, is to be utilis ed as a convalescent hospital.

"The London County Council has bought it as it standa. It may be the nucleus of a great convalescent home indeed, for it has an area of about ninety-seven seres. It is not yet known whether this hospital, which has 600 beds, will be open to patients from voluntary hos pitals. Nothing much can be said about it until after April 1, when the Local Government Act comes into force."

War Triumphs. The work executed in the hospit-

"Wind Amongst The Trees" (Briecialdi), Clement Barone. Tales of Hoffman-Les Oiseaux

Flautist. Dans La Charmille (Doll

Sorg) and " Mignon-Polonaise -Je Suis Titania!! (I'm Fair Titania), Marion Talley, "Ballade fa G Minor" (Chopin,

ou. 23), Alfred Cortot. "Cielito Lindo" (Beautiful Sky) and "Carmela," Dusolina Gian- nini. "1 Call Upon Thee, Jesus (Bach)

and **Prelude In E Flat Minor" (Bach), Philadelphia Symphony Orchestra under the direction of Leopold Stokowski,,

Don Juan-Minuet" (Mozart): L Le Tambourin (Jean Philippe

Rameau); 2 Le Coucou-Rondo (Claude Daquio), Wanda Lan dowska.

1. La Fille Aur Cheveux De Lin (The Maiden With Flaxen Hair" and 2. Scherzo-Im- promptu," "Waltz: (La Plus Que Lente-Valse)" (Debussy), Jascha Heifetz, "The Sands O Dee" (Chan. Kingsley-Fred Clay) and Pin- chinello" (F. E. Weatherly-J. L. Molloy) Reizald Werrenrath,

RADIO TELEPHONES TO

AMERICA. LINKING UP WITH FAR EAST THIS YEAR.

[United Press.]

New Youx, Jan. 31. A trans-Pacific radio telephone service will be the next step in ex- pansion of telephonic service-round the world after the opening of the New York-to-South America" link, according to experts attending the convention of the American In- stitute of Electrical Engineers here to day.

There are several offences for which a penalty kick, may be award- auyed, as is fairly well kugan, but it would be most interesting to "en- umerate them. The most common are handling and tripping, but the latter must not be confused withal during the war was one of the a tackle for the ball when there is great triumphs of the war. Ma no intent to foul the player. in pos- jor Gillies raised plastic surgery ression. Here again the referee is to a level unknown before the war. the sóle judge, and his decision It is due to his skill that many does not always meet with ap- of these once-mutilated - men proval.

able to go about to-day with pas sable features, some showing noth-weeksa. ing more than a scar.

WINNKED, Feb. 1 Provincial authorities hero acted to-day to prevent brokers under investigation in Toronto from dumping buge holdings of wheat on to the market.

It is believed that the action in releasing brokers' funds, tied up by the Government on Thursday, will prevent a decline, but in the event that a reaction occurs as a result of the investigation, the provincial Governments of Mani- toba and Saskatchewan are prepar- ed to release funds to support the market.

READERS

ADVICE FOR INVESTORS,

A70 reminded that inquiries relating to the share market are answers. ed on page 11 every Tuesday by "Kufan." Letters should be sent to this office, and must be accompanied by writer's DEMе and address, not for publication Letters should be addressed to "Kufan," care of. the Editor.

Kicking and Striking.

are

He took strips from foreheads and mended noses. He built-up men's jaws with bones from legs. Holes in cheeks were filled in with fatty tissue and covered over with akin

Other offences which are punish- able by a penalty kick are kick- ing an opponent and striking an opponent. It may 'so happen that players guilty of thess offences re- ceive marching orders also, but, that does not prevent a penalty The hospital may be utilised in kick being awarded if the offence a dozen different ways, but the occurs within the area. It is in-memory of Major Gillies work will teresting to note that a penalty ever remain as A world achieve. kick can be awarded irrespective of meat, the position of the ball, if in the field of play at the time the offence 15 committed

The Buenos Aires circuit has been tested and it is expected to start operation within the next few

American Telegraph & Telephone Co. experts admitted to day that the question of a trans-Pacific ser vie is now under consideration. It has not, however, progressed suf- ficiently to warrant public announ

cemeat.

Indications are, however, that be-- fore the end of 1830 plans will be definitely laid to bring the Far East into direct telephonic conneo- tion with the United States. This is especially trus of Manila, Hone- Julu, and Tokyo.

holding, and a penalty kick should It was pointed out that atmos- Jumping at an opponent, push-be awarded.

pheric conditions for the installa ing an opponent, charging an op- There are thus nine offences in. tion of such a servios are consider. ponent violently, or dangerously all, for which a penalty kick mayed to be ideal in the Pacific area. charging an opponent from behind, be given only when they are com- Such a service would require and holding, an opponent complete mitted by the defending side with erection of a powerful station, the offences for which penalty in their penalty area, and it is a either at San Francisco or Los kick is given. Extending the arms simple matter to remember that Angeles, equal to the station at to keep an opponent back, though when these offences occur outside Lawrenceville, New Jersey, which not actually catching hold of him the penalty area. a free kick is is transmitting to Europe at pre with the hand, is considered to be

awarded, from which a goal may sent and will handle. the Buenga (Continued at foot of next column). be scored direct,...

Aires circuit,

ཐོ་

QUEEN'S

WITH DIALOGUE

THE

Every thrill of the famous novel in the film

OF

marvel

· PLOUE

SAN

LUIS

with LILY DAMITA, ERNEST TORRENCE, RAQUEL TORRES AND DON ALVARADO

ALL-TALKING COMEDY

CHARLEY CHASE

IN

"THE SHAPPY SNEEZER

-METROTONE NEWS-

"LATEST EVENTS OF THE DAY

FINAL SHOWINGS TO-DAY At 2.30, 5.10; 7.15 & 9.20.

WORLD

CASANOVA,

THE PRINCE

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with

IVAN MOSJUKINE

Europe's Screen Idol

and Star of

"MICHAEL STROGOFF" Gorgeous Colour Scenes.

FINAL SHOWINGS TO-DAY AT 5.15 & 9.20.

At 2.30 £ 7.15

Chinese Picture "The Adopted Son's Victory"

STAR

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LOUISE FAZENDA -

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FROM THE PLAY BY EDGAR WALLACE

FINAL SHOWINGS TO-DAY

At 2.30, 5.80 & 0.20.