1929-10-21 — Page 3

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HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.

THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, MONDAY, OCTOBER 21, 1929.

SUBURBAN HEIGHTS--NEIGHBORHOOD UMBRELLAS

By GLUYAS WILLIAMS |

Lady (phoning musicstore pro- "prietor): "I have just had my radio installed and it is working fine, but the orchestra in Cincin natics playing too fast. Is there any way that I can slow it down?"

11

The golling novice finished his first game and banded his scure card to the secretary.

"Two below bogey !" he remarked proudly,

"But," pretested the official, "this is nowhere near bogey !?!

The novice looked hurt.

Compare the score," he said, with the figures on the card, and 'you'll ace".

The secretary looked. "Great Scott, man," he roared, that's the length of the course in yards,

A pompous old gentleman, visit ing a rural district, wished to in- apeet some ruins in the neighbour hood. He inquired for, the oldest inhabitant, and asked him so many needless questions that at last the ancient personage lost his temper and said:

I'll tell theo a better way yet Go straight down yonder, take fust turning to right, second to left, over four stiles, past the Blue Bear, up. Milestone Hill and over the common till you come to the Windy Wood; go down till you get to the middle of that 'ere wood, and then"

р

**Well, and what then

Then," said the oldest inhabit- ant. I'm blowed if you won't be properly lost

mga p

"Cheer up!" said the lawyer. "We may still win this case? haven't exhausted all the means—”

"But you've exhausted all mine!" interrupted the client, gloomily.

Son: Dad, let's buy a new car!" Dad: "Wait till I've had a ride in the old one, will you?"

I

"What is the capital of the Unit ed States ?"

"New York City."

"No, no I said what, not where

Overheard on the bus:

"They told me to make myself one of the family, so of course I couldø't use the guest towel, either."

An attorney who advertised for & chaufeur, when questioning one of the applicants, said: "How about you, George; are you married!"

"Naw, sir, boas; naw, sir; Alr makes my own livin.""*

Has young Jones any gift for painting "

Yes, a sailor friend gave him a lot of old canvas."

Tourist: "If no one bought any would be ruined, eh?" thing at your shop for a week you

contrary, I give such value it might "On the Village Shopkeeper: be the making of me!"

She (to bank manager): "I want to be a customer of yours,

Bank Manager: "Yon you'd like to bank with us?"

menn,

is to borrow £5."

She: "Well, what I really want

endurance flight. What made you "You were going well on your come down?"

"Well, I was up 30 days, and I had to make a payment on the plane."

Wealthy Prospective Father-in- Ina: "And can you support my daughter-"

Suitor: Yes, and in the manor to which she has been accustomed."

Smith: Is that chap Brown & relation of yours 1"

CROSSWORD PUZZLE.

116

14

ASK WHERE'S HIS LM- BRELLA, THERE'S ONLY CHE IN THE CLOSET AND

THAT IS NIT HIS

EXPLAINS TO MET, WHO AFTER A BOOD DEAL OF RUMMAGING PRODUCES AN ODD. UMBRELLA WHICH IS PROBABLY LES CRUM'S

GUMAG

AFTER CLOSE INSPECTION DECIDES THIS IS FRED PERLEY'S AND TRED „MUST HAVE HIS

TAKES IT TO LES WHO REMEMBERS THAT HE DID HAVE AN UNBRELA THAT DIDN'T BELONG TO HIM BUT ERNIE PLDMER

BORROWED IT

WILLETTS (Copyright, 1929, by The Ball Syndicate, Inc.)

PICTURES

Sybil Thorndike may have fai lures in London, but the moment Brown: Yes; a distant one." Smith: Very distant 7

she goes back on tour-and. she is Brown: "Well, rather. He's the now eldest of 15 children, and I'm the Finys

travelling with "Madame

Nap"-the youngest."

cities chant their eulogies, and hold receptions in her honour. Indeed, she is the only English actress whom the pro- vinees treat like a queen. Edin burgh's ceremony was remarkable because the pioneers of suffrage and higher education were presided over by Dr. E. 8. Mair, LI.D., greatgranddaughter of Sarah Sid- dons, who compared the two women as actresses, and in their private lives. Both were earnest and de. termined to succeed," she said, "and they reached success by con atant steady work. Both were home-lovers, both had learned their job in bare, and, whereas Sarah Siddons liked to come home to a couple of chops and a glass of beer, Sybil eats fried eggs and a little bacon. Sybil, in reply, said that when she met her husband, Lewis Casson, in Manchester, she Was thinking only of the stage and music, whereas he said, "You are not interested in woman's suffrage 1 How can you stand there and sny that 7" So, because he was rather nice, she went to hear Mra. Pank- hurst and Annie Kenney, and then he made her speak in public.

A

2 ન

4 15 16

B

ร

10

12

113

15

17

18

19

20

22

23 24

25

26

27

28

30

32

35

36.

38 39

40

42

45

140

50

151

52 153

55

56

Horizontal.

1-Queen of the fairies.

4.-A bird.

8.- Obese.

11.--Mouths..

133 134

16. Electrified particle. 18.-Aloft.

L-One who writes of actualities. 22. To study closely. 23.-Cleaning utensil.

12-Supposed emanation from Guido musical note.

body.

13. After a while.

15. Carrying on.

17. Religious order member.

19.Part of infinitive.

20.-Spot.

22.-Domestic animal.

21.-Corded fabric

23.-Miserly.

26. Gave food.to.

20.-Apportion.

27-Antique.

28.-Neckpiece.

20.-Vast age.

30.-Father.

31.-To lament.

33.-Musical note.

35.-Anger.

30.-Hotel.

37. To do evil,

38.-Compassion.

40,---Custom.

41.-Active.

i

42-Kind of worm.

43.—An insect.

44.-Actor's signal.

45.-Symbol for oleum.

46.-Hole.

47.-Solitary.

50.-Title.

32-Persia. 04.—Welsh river. 55. Encountered. 50Fine net work. 87.-Was scated.

1.-To cut.

Vertical,

2-A constellation.

3-City of Turkey.

4.Hypocritical religious talk.

B.-Mat.

6-Conjunction.

7-Lessened..

---Breeze making device.

9-Article.

10:--The sum

14.-Letter.

25.-A dandy,

25.-Mother deer.

99.--An insect.

20.-Sea eagle.

31.-Moistureless.

32.-A number,

33.-A tree.

34.-One, no matter which.

35. Possessive pronoun. 37.-Hurries.

38.-Mexican permat 30-Mohammedan religion. 40-Up to that time. 41-A heavenly body. 43.--A sloth.

44.-Favorite. -

47.-100,000 rupees.

48.-Grassy plain.

49.-Still.

61.-Pronoun.

53.-Egyptian god.

This puzzle took 23 minutes to solve. See how long it will take you to solve it.

SATURDAY'S SOLUTION,

No. 1470

GAY BE DBER OHA

[OF

GRA

| អន

UP

SEPOM FET FAR-RITE DEA

LL GAUBADES AB DOZZABIESOSE DEATS SO BEE

*.*..

When it was suggested by a de legate at the Trade Union Congress in Belfast recent that legislation should be passed to safeguard musi- cians in view of the sound-film menube, a Lancashire delegate ap pealed to congress not to pass it, and it was rejected. "The public

GOES OVER TO FRED'S TO EXCHANGE, BUT FINDS THAT ONLY UMBRELLA FRED HAS IS ONE OF MILT GRIESBY'S

AT ERNIE'S FINALLY TRACKS TOWN UMBREL LA THAT SEEMS TO BE

HIS, AND RETURNS "HOME SATISFIED

AND

DECIDES THAT AT LAST BRIDGE PARTY MET MUST HAVE TAKEN HIS BY MISTAKE. CARRIES IT OVER TO MILT'S

IS MET AT DOOR BY WIFE WITH THE NEWS THAT SHE JUST FOUND HS UMBRELLA IN THE

BACK ENTRY

9-25

PLAYS.

will defeat its objects even if you pass it," he said. "Look at the crowds that are waiting to see Sonny Boy' and 'Broadway, and ask yourselves if they want legislation to prevent them going to the talkies. We cannot oppose these modern innovations. This resolution is only one to prevent the public having what they desire. It is selfish."

How many people realise how much historical fiction is founded ou fact. An American called Op- penheimer, who asked for four seats. for the first night of Jew. Süs " claims to be a direct descendant of Josef Süss Oppenheimer, who really lived, in 1737, in the Duchy of Wurtemberg, where he Was hanged, and where be actually the centre of important happenings Basically, it is true. Even the death of his daughter, his control of the State's finances, and the policy of the Duke Karl Alex- ander are true. Indeed, Matheson Lang is copying his make-up from a portrait of the real Jew Suss

Was

orange sad purple costumes, which would photograph black, have been substituted by a colour scheme of silver grey and royal blue. “The Co-Optimists" is the first venture into talkie production of the New Era Company, which sponsored most of the famous British war films, and is being made by the sound process of the Radio Cor poration of America. It will be, in the main, an exact screen fae, simile of the stage performance.

"Yesterday's Harvest" was pro- duced in London last month at the Apollo.

opens in a Paris fiat, just after the The action of the play

war. Sir Philip Quinton tells Mar- garet, the girl with whom he has been living for six months, that he must go back home and leave her. Seven years later Margaret, to have to marry Tony, Philip's much-lov- her long looked-for revenge, plans ed young brother, and, at the mp- ment of victory, realises how she is deceiving the trusting Tony. This is a most effective scene, be Phyllis Monkman, Betty Chester, autifully played by Carol Goodner Davy Burnaby, Melville Gideon, and Robert Harris Tony marries and the entire Co-Optimists com- Margaret, who is eceived with pany, ten in all, are making a open arms by his family, 'and espe talkie of themselves during the day cially by his mother. Margaret is Twickenham, and giving their now in love with Tony. Every- ordiliary performance on the stage thing is happiness. Then Philip. at night. They start at some in-turna up and provides an intrigu credibly early hour, under the pro- ing situation. The authoress is duction management of Laddie fortunate in her players.. Marie Cliff, aided on the technical side Lahr, as the whitehaired old mo- by Mr. Edwin Greenwood and Sir ther, with her wisdom, her tender. Gordon Craig, and continue until neas, and her great love for her two six o'clock in the evening. Their sons, makes the play.

THE WOMAN'S CORNER.

SOUFFLES."

Vanilla soufflé is the simplest one to attempt. This requires 1 oz, flour, 1 o, butter, gill of milk, 4 When something light, yet hot, { Cgga, 1 oz, sugar, teaspoonful

Vanilla essence, pinch salt.

light

is needed in the way of paddinga, there is nothing nicer than a

Melt the butter, stir in the flour smoothly, then the milk Cook for puffy souffle. On account of the four minutes, stirring all the time, eggs in them, soufflés are very then add the sugar and vanilla nourishing, and are particularly Allow the mixture to cool a little, recommended for invalids who re-beat up the egg yolks and stir them volt against eggs in their usual in. forms of preparation.

Whip up the egg whites very atif- The success of a souflé depends fy and fold them in very gently on the beating and folding in of Pour. at once into the prepared the whites. These must be quite soufflé mould and steam gently for stiff so that they leave the plate forty minutes, with buttered paper clean and dry, and must be lightly over the top. Serve with jam folded into the rest of the mixture Bauce. with as little movement as possible so as not to break down the light, airy structure of the white mass.

To prepare a soufflé tin, well but- ter the inside, and tie a band of huttered white paper outside it, enough to come two or three inches

above the top. Cut out a cirdle of

paper to fit over the top and but ter it.

Individual CasAS,

Chocolate Souze.

MUSSOLINI AS FAIRY GODMOTHER.

THE TROUSSEAU OF

TERESA TESTA

Teresa Testa, of Tortons, is s girl who understands the art of making bay while the aun shines. She is a fair-haired, blue-eyed peas ant girl of twenty, engaged to be lacking the means to buy herself married to a young workman, but the necessary outfit. Having read in the Freas that Mussolini had given a sewing machine to a girl of Pavis to enable her to earn her

LEW CODY, AILEEN PRINGLE 19 A SINGLE MAN

AT THE

2.30, 5.10, 7.15, & 9.29

QUEEN'S FINAL SHOWINGS TO-DAY

STAR

BUCK JONES:

IN

BLACK JACK

A ROMANCE OF THE WEST

FINAL SHOWINGS_TO-DAY

At 5.30 & 9:20.

•

WORLD

DOUBLE ATTRACTION

יו,

IN

CHARLES RAY

COUNT OF TEN

IN

TOM MIX

ARIZONA WILD CAT

FINAL SHOWINGS TO-DAY. Continuons Performanes 1.16 to 11.18

STAR THEATRE

ONE PERFORMANCE ONLY TUESDAY, OCTOBER 22nd at 9.15 P.M.

AMERICA'S PREMIEH DANSEUSE RUTH

VAN VALEY

(LATE CAPITOL THEATRE, NY.) AND

ROSE LEE

MACK SENNETT

BATHING BEAUTY

KAY SCOTT Pianist Supremo

ESTHER VAN VALBY

Oploratara Soprano

THE FORMER PARTNER OF

CHARLIE

"Smiling" Jack Medford in Soug

CHAPLIN

REX STOREY

* Dr.' POSTER

The Juggling Jester

JEANNINE ELLIOTT Violinist

WORLD-FAMOUS MARIONETTES

MANTELL'S MANIKINS

GREATEST OF ALL POPPET SHOWS

TELLMAN

Magician

PLANS AT MOUTRIE'S

AND THE STAR.

LEN AYRES

Talkative Trickster

PRICES:-$3, $2 & $1.

SORE THROAT THE ENEMY

FRAC

EVANS

EVANS PASTILLES are a surs

shield againat all winter illa such as Sore Throats, Conghu and Colds. The | antiseptic expours penetrate into the Hintermast cavities of the nose, throat and chest, killing sil germs and quickly sooth- ing the inflamed organs.

Made in England to the formula of the Liverpool Thregi Hospital and sold by Chemists everywhere.

EVANS

ANTILISTIC, THROAT

Pastilles

To keep in Form

Drink

OVALTINE daily

living Teresa sat down and peaned Delicious Hot or Cold,

the following letter to the Duce:-

1am

young, strong, and A breakfastcupful grated sweet Eealthy. I want to be married, but chocolate, 1 oz. butter, 1 oz flour, as I have to work and help my three eggs, half-plat milk, two teas. five little sisters. If You help me. poonfuls augar, vanilla essence. I promise you that I will always -Mix the milk, sugar and chocolata 600 wife and bring up my

together. Melt the butter and stir tones to be good, healthy, and ASTHMA▪

in the flour, then add the above mixture..

Inquiries were made, and as the facts stated by Teresa proved to be perfectly true, she found herself one day called before the Podesta of Tortona, who showed her a letter written to him by Mussolini, con- taiming these words: "See that Teresa Teta has her outfit."

The girl's Ledlings may be im- agined. "I wrote to the Duce," sho told an interviewer, "to thank A soufflé should be quite dry and him, and it took me three days to spongy in the centre. Test it gent-compose the letter. Even then it

Let it cook for two or three minutes, stirring all the time; then It is really better to serve the cool it slightly and stir in the soufflé in the case in which it is yolks of eggs, beating in each one cooked, though when a tin is used | separately, Then fold in lightly some people profer to turn it out. the stiffly beaten whites.

This must be done very careful- y as the soufflé soon breaks. If a freproof china caso is used there is no reason why the soufld should not be served in the case, and when a tin is used, a napkin can always be tied round it.

Pour into a prepared tin, cover with buttered paper and steam for forty minutes.

ly, with the fingers; if it "gives" didn't say all that I wanted, bus but goes smooth again, it is cooked. the Duce will understand,”

Sufferers from Asthma find in stant relief in this standsed remedy of 60 years standing. As all chemists

HIMROD'S

Asthma Cure

THE TIME FOR

BLANKETS

IS HERE, BUT WHAT SHALL' BE DONE FOR THOSE WHO

CANNOT AFFORD THEM PA

Mat the Society Room, MEMBERS of the Committes at-

CHT HALL, EVERY, MONDAY and THURSDAY, at 10.30 to receive. GIFTS of BLANKETS, Part-worn ́Olothing, etc.

HONG KONG BENEVOLENT

BOCIETY. (Ext: 1889.)

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