HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.
"How's the now country club 7”? "Not bad! They serve the best 50 cent dinner in this section for
Young Bride: "I didn't accept Harry the first time he proposed." Her Rival : No, dear; you weren't there."
"How'll you have your rescue?"! wirelessed the const.guard.
"Fried." replied the captain of the ship in distress
Hallo, Smith, I hear you've got married. Really, old boy, I had no idea you intended to marry that little widow "
"Neither had I. The idea was hers!"
. Papi Kangaroo : Where's the
baby, dear?"
Mother Kangaroo (feeling in her pockets): "Now, that's funny. Guess I must have left it, in my other, clothes."*
"Did you tell her when you pro posed that you weren't worthy of her? That always makes a good impression."
Well, I was going to. But she told me so first.'
Loving Wife: "Now that you' are ruined, Henry, I will disclose iny secret. For years I have been saving up, and now" (pouring a shower of silver coins into his Bat) "this may tide you over."
•
Husband: 'Oh, my darling, how did you manage to do it "
Wife: Every time you said an unkind thing to me I put a shilling into a box'
A young man took his grand- mother to see a play in which the language WKS fearful. Oaths, lasphemy and bad words of all kinda left the audience agape after
each act.
The old lady was alternately horrified and fascinated. After the second act she beat down to search for something under har scal,
"What are you looking for, Granny said the young man."
"My darned programme!" the replied.
Sporting Mother, (to son): "Well, ow many goals did you kick to-day "
Son: Three-an' I reckon if I adn't been wearing your old boots, I'd have kicked ix!
THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 3, 1929.
Post (excitedly, to landlady); Mr. Jones, I've sold my poem called 'Ode to à Fair Lady'!”
Landlady: Have you Well, you'd be better at writing one vali. led Owed to a Landlay"?
I'm sorry, sir, but the presi dent of the frm says that he's 'not in' to salesmen."
"Well,' observed the caller, i please present my compliments, and tell him I haven't called.”
Bachelor: "Let me shake your hand, old boy. This is one of the happiest days of your life."
Groom-to-Be: You're too pre- vious. I'm not to be married un til to-morrow."
Bachelor: Well 1"
Tommy, pick that apple up boy. It might terapt a poor, near the garden gate, you naughty hungry tramp to steal it!"
That's just what I want, mo- ther." answered Tommy. I've scooped the inside out, and, filled it with, pepper."
The last time I gave you money," said the old lady. "you promised you wouldn't walk straight into a public-house and spend it."
"That's right, lady," said the tramu.
"Well, as soon as you got the money you did."
Lady, don't you know the difference between a walk and a anrint "
Colton teils of the head of a cér
taint college at Oxford who, on be ing asked by a stranger what was the motto of the arms of that school, 'told him. Dominus illuminatio mea (the Lord is my light),
SNAPSHOTS OF A BABY IN HOT WEATHER
GwYat WILLIAMS
DOESN'T SEE WHY THE GROWN-UPS ARE MAKING SUCH A FUSS ABOUT THIS HOT SPELL
AND IF HE'D RATHER PLAY THAN TAKE HIS NAP THEY SAY, NO WONDER, WHEN mo' 60 HOT
AND HE DOESN'T HAVE TO
WEAR MANY CLOTHES
AS FOR HIM HE, THRIVES ON HOT WEATHER,
AND THEY DON'T FORCE HIM TO FINISH HIS BOTTLE AS THEY DO IN COOL WEATHER
AND THE FEW THAT THEY PUT ON HIM ARE EASILY GOTTEN OUT OF
(Copyright, 1929, by The Belt Syndicats, Inc.)
SPORT
ANOTHER HENLEY
DEAD-HEAT.
The verdict of the enthusiasts who
By GLUYAS WILLIAMS
THEY LET HIM CRY AS MUCH
AS HE FEELS LIKE AND
BLAME IT ON THE HEAT
AND THEY LET HIM SUCK HIS THUMB BECAUSE THEY THINK IT WILL KEEP HIS MIND OFF THE HEAT
ARD ALL IN ALL LIFE IS VERY ROSY IN HOT WEATHER
DRAMA !
ACTION!
THRILLS!
In a thrilling and absorbing story of a
newspaper's battle with a gang of under-
world criminals.
FREEDOM
OF THE
PRESS
From the story by
PETER B. KYNE
with
LEWIS STONE
MARCELINE DAY, HENRY B; WALTHALL
ADDED ATTRACTION
7.18 & 9.20,
TORCAT'S ROOSTERS
8-8
AT THI
AND ATHLETICS.
THE SAN SEBASTIAN GRAND NATIONAL
The National Flying Club San braved the weather at Henley re- Sebastian race the Grand National cently, and saw some of the most of pigeon racing-proved a brilliant amazing races this classic meeting success, more than 400 birds being has ever provided, was that it was timed in the day after liberation. one of the great days in the history It is not possible to give any official of the Royal Regatta.
result yet, owing to the wide area covered by the race, but Mr. first two will be W. B. Reeve, of Gilbert, the secretary, states the
Wickham Market, velocity 1092, and F, W. Marriott, of Saltley, 1017.
But he also candidly informed In the frst place, a new chapter opinion an appropriate addition two consecuted races ended in a the inquirer that in his private of rowing history was written when might he found in these words, dead-heat. "Aristoteles me tenebra" (Ari- stotle is my darkness).
CROSSWORD PUZZLE.
16
{2
19
10 11
12
14
15
116
57 18
19
20
21
22
124 125
26
28 29
30
Q
அ
132
33
34
135
36
537
38
39 40
4)
142
43 144
45
46 47
148
50
51
52 53
54
155
56
£7
Horizontal.
1-To avoid. 3-Damp."
8-Dull beavy sound. 12-Narrow road.
13-A malt liquor.
14-A rodent.
15-Places of worship.
17-Citizen of Doris,"
19. To fret.
20-Girl's toys. 21-Employs.
23-Article of attire. 2A-Golfer's mound. 20.-To part. 28-To plunge. 31-Conjunction. 32-Gratuity. 33-Musical note. 34-Loutish persau. 30-Greek poet, 38-Corded cloth. 33.-Black,
41-Metal vein.
43-A fruit.
48-Girl's name.
48.-Dodged
50--To strip. $1,-Pipe. 6-Australian bird.
··64-To- give out,
55.-Winter vehicle.
30-To marry 57-Placed.
1-Cabbage.
Vertical
2-Eing over saint's portrait.
2-Faithless.
4-Approactics.
-Part of "to be"
Spanish article.
-To sprend for drying.
8.-To pulsate.
9. Saluted.
10-Russian mountains. 11-Lairs.
18.-Kind of grain (plural). 15,--Scent,
2-Bristle.
23. To drive back
24-Also.
25.-Age.
27.--Vigour.
20.-Wrath.
20-Slang for energy.
35.-Pertaining to one sex. 36-To sharpen. 37.-A flower.
33-To take up again. 46.-Portended. 42.-Sand hills.
43.-Permits.
44-Immoral.
.
46.-Mine, entrance.
47.-Seizes. ...
49.-Moisture.
50.-Shell that failed.
$3.-Pronoun.
11
This puzzle took 24 minutes to solve. "See how long it will take you
It is many years since there was a dead-heat at Healey, but Argonaut R.C., the best eight in Canada, con- tributed to an achievement that has no precedent- tie in the Grand Challenge Cup. They met London R.C. one of Britain's best crews. and rowed behind them most of the way; not much behind, but never-
theless just far enough away to be in danger of defent.
With a mile completed London were comfortably ahead, and it seemed to be all over, but the Canadians made one of the greatest efforts ever seen, gained an inch at a time, and just caught London
The Lord Dewar trophy for the best two nominated birds wili prob- ably be won by Mr. J. J. Marsh. Donnington, near Rotherham, York 700 miles, with velocities of 917 an 907..
11
WINCHESTER GAMES.» Pay-Comdr. R. E. Worthington, the holder of the challenge cup. Navy left in the men's singles in the was the only representative of the Winchester lawn tennis tournament. In the fourth round he defeated Comdr. C. Coppinger by T-6, 6-3. Contur. P. F. Glover was beaten by Capt. H. S. L. Barclay after a good
Macleod, and Mrs. S. C. Eumbrey match by G, 86. Mrs. MB. Reckitt Miss E. Hemmant, Mrs.
are the Inst. four in the women's singles.
BLAZING SPEED BOAT THEILL, Three speed-boat enthusiasts ere imperilled by sen mishaps, aile crowds of holiday-makers watched breathless. Two occupants: of the Show Boat jumped into the sen just in time to save themselves when the craft burst into flames an nec of winning his third Sanwhile on a demonstration trip at Sebastian race. He has already won two King's Cups on the north road, and two on the south.
Mr. Marriott's performance is, e noteworthy one, as he was within
on the post with their last desperate almost a repetition of the previous effort. Both crews were nearly result. London leading all the way rowed out, and the Argonaut stroke and being overhauled towards the
the verge of collapse.
finish, but passing the judge a quar- The heat was rowed again at theter of a length ahead, in 7mins. end of the day, and there was Saecs.-the best time and one of the (Continued on next Column.) greatest races at this year's regatta,
THE
ENTERTAINING MADE
EASY.
Clacton. The craft was between the jetty and the pier when, it is believed, the petrol tank exploded. Boatmen immediately put out to the rescue and picked up the passen- gers, bath men, as the ank.
A speed-bont taking part in a race at Brighton Regatta capsized and pitched the driver, Mr., I. Lewis, of the Sussex Motor Yacht Club, in the track of an oncoming competitor, but he escaped with a ducking.
WOMAN'S CORNER.
vermouth, a cocktail usually costs under 30 cents a glass. Certainly those one gets at most such parties are well under this figure.
Let us imagine that they are that most familiar mixture of all, one- third gin, one-third vermouth, one- sixth the juice of orange or grape fruit, and one-six 'iec.
BUYING A BATHING SUIT.
Buying a bathing suit is rather like having a lucky dip in a tub full of bran and parcela., You may come away, with something you like or you may find yourself" in possession of a suit that you would not care to be found drown- ing in.
Bathing dresses, like other clothes, are apt to be much too elaborate this year: they have broken out into horrible rashes of multi-coloured spots, and they are suffering badly from dabs of cubist trimmings.
A "TROUPE OF 60 GAME
FOWLS
IN A RIOT OF COMEDY AND ACROBATICS I
Slight Increase in Prices.
TO-DAY & TO-MORROW
QUEEN'S At 280, 5.10, 7.15 & 9.20,
ANOTHER "PAINTING THE TOWN" !
AT THE
GLENN
TRYON
with Patsy Ruth Miller
HOT HEELS
UNIVERSALA PICTURERNAT
WORLD
TO-DAY & TO-MORROW
At 2.30, 5.15, 7.15 & 8.20,
ATENSE, ABSORBING STORY OF LOVE,
·HATE AND REVENGE!··
AT THE
CORSICAN
HAVE YO
Featuring
ROLLA NORMAN
and
JACQUELINE FORZANE”
A BRITISH PRODUCTION !
STAR
CINEMA NEWS.
FREEDOM OF THE PRESS "
AT THE QUEEN'S...
TO-DAY & TO-MORROW
STAR.
**Corsican Love," An unusual love drama, which comes to the Star
At 5.30 & 8.20.
THE DIOCESAN BOYS' SCHOOL.
REUNION AT MANILA.
An Old Boys' Dinner was held at
Probably you have your own special mixture, which meana
A bathing suit does not look its The interesting and dramatic at the Cosmos Club, Manila, P.I., an adding small quantities of orange best in the hand, and a proper mosphere of life on the staff of a Thursday, August 3, when the bitters, grenadine, Bourbon whisky, sense of modesty prevents most wo-
is the newspaper
Leature of guests were:-Mr. H. K. Kwong, Chinese Consul General in men from even asking to be allowFreedom of the Prean," which is the absinthe, or a favouring of brandy, but as a rule it simply means that ed to try this kind of garment on being shown to-day and to-morrow Manila, the Rev. W. T. Feather rather less gin is used, and there-
in the shop.
et the Queen's Theatre.. 4 stone, Headmaster, Dr. See Chong The other day a creditor in a
fore the cost of the whole mixture So the only thing to do is to
A battle between the underworld Su, Ph.D., and Mr. Sing Chong London Law Court put forward the is not much increased. Actually walk bravely up to the counter, or of a big city and the power of the Keng. plea that bis debtor could obviously the cocktail already described is a
counters, piled bigh with swim-pen-or rather a big daily paper is The following sixteen old boys afford to pay his bill as he had good deal stronger than many ming costumes, go through them
were present:-Mr. Uy Cho Yee given a cocktail party a day or two people, provide, who economically carefully, and buy the most attracLewis Stone, who recen
Lewis Stone, who recently appear (1910), the School's representative before...
tive one that looks as if it would ed in "Wild Orchids" is add more ice.
the in Manila, Mr. Uy Teng Tin (1921), According to his line of argument, No one ever cats very much at a fit you and is at the same time power behind the underworld," Mr. Uy Teng Tong (1924), Mr. Cu to give a cocktail party could be cocktail party, and the food pro- practical.
and Marceline Day has the Ka Keng (1825), Mr. Dee Se Kiat counted as a definite sign of wealth.bably does not cost more than a few
feminine lead.
(1924), Mr. Wong Yau Cheng The creditor may have been right in dollars. There are, perhaps, sand-
(1916), Mr. Ngan Sin Chick (1924), this particular case, but to gener-wiches, a couple of bottles of olives
CORSICAN LOVE" AT THE Kim Puat (1925), Mr. Ty Tien Kee Mr. Li Hoan Chai (1924), Bắc. Tỷ alise in such way made one and alsg of salted almonds, emptied realise that he could never have into little distics, a few cakes or
(1926), Mr. T Gia Kim (1995), Mr. Chua Lian Soon (1924), Mr. O pieces of gruyere cheese, cut very given a cocktail party himself.
thinly and placed in the centre of
Tiong Keng (1972), Mr. Ngo Ka Hu (1997), Mr. Mariano Malcampo rolis, as well as a plentiful supply of the potato chips that people are One type of suit that looks very Theatre to-day, tells a story of the (1911), Mr. Chua Kai Tai (1923).
well for sca: bathing is the top, conflict between tradition and pro- During the proceedings two photo. trousers and an apology for a skirt gress in that island. The picture graphs were taken. A second re If it had been stated that the not be counted a sign of wealth It stockinette, and worn with a rub-mosphere, of its background in the has been appointed Chinese Conzal No, to give a cocktail party pan-woven, all in one of rather thick is notable for the fascinating at presentative of the School in Manila gentleman in question had enter is simply far the easiest and ber belt about two inches wide, or Corsican mountains where much of namely, Mr. Cu Ka Kong who was tained half 2 dozen friends to cheapest way of repaying social striped belt of course webbing. the film was photographed. The a boarder at the School from 1919 dinner at any of the better known obligations to a large number of A black suit of this kind is very story deals with a woman who to 1925. London restaurants, taken the same people. If this method of enter smart worn with a white belt and devoted her life to her father's party to a fashionable dance club taining had not been invented, it white can, or a white suit with a business as a steel manufacturer The outlaw's brave front, and win- or treated them to stalls at the would be quite impossible for a striped webbing belt and plain hel. In the course of this business, thening personality cause her to foll theatre, then it might be taken as 170_BIZ114011n definite sign of wealth. The bill large number of hard-up modern met cap with the same colouring tries to buy the site of an old enstle in love, and she not only helps him
on it, young people to entertain each
which she proposes to raze to make to escape from the police but would have probably far exceeded other or return the hospitality of
Another kind of suit that it al-room for a new steel mill. But the changes her mind about the castle the cost of the average cocktail
wealthier friends.
ways popular cousists of a top of castle holds cherished memories for site. Her father, however, has the party, where thirty or forty people.
one colour in a rather thin stocki- its aged and impoverished owner castle blown up, and with the out- are entertained.
nette and shorts, (very short) of and he refuses to sell. A mortgage law thinking the woman has de contrasting colour in flapmet or to the property falls on her hands,ceived him, the way is paved for: stockinette.
but she is threatened by the old big climax.
to solve it.
YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.
UNOBZARA ZE 300712ÖR. FAN 33DKAR 270370 OPIO DO
תחת מהכתרתה
מה
HA BEE BON 80 PANABADAA JAMIN AILB - BON
XOX ORDANİK
41230KDR=#00 502 53878 487
The real reason why cocktail parties have enjoyed ea much popularity for such a long time is that they are the cheapest form of entertaining that has ever been invented.
Provided you do not insist upon liqueur brandy as the basis, of your cocktail, nor scorn that faithful cheap friend, Italian or French
so fond of nibbling while drinking
cocktails,
good thick stockinette, and in a dark colour, because pala coloured stockinette goes transparent when it is wet.
If you prefer a one-piece suit do nobleman's son, an outlaw living Rolla Norman is the brigand, and be careful to choose it in a really in the bills because of a vendetta Jacqueline Forzane has the role of (Continued on Previous, Column) | (Continued at foot of nest column), the woman.
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