1929-08-13 — Page 3

HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.

I don't mind having rings on my fingers," he said, as be limped from the danch, but I'm hanged if I can stand ‘bolles on my toes" i "granny? It was Marconi."!

Harold (showing granny his wire- loss set): "Of course, you know who invented wireless, "don't you,

Little Simpson-" He called me

a liar, and, big as he was, I knock-

ed him sprawling",

Wife With your fist"

Granny: "Earold Harold! How disrespectfull You should Bay Mrs. Coal."

Mother: "That young Mr. Sails- Little Simpson-"No, with my man has been paying you a lot of attention lately. Do you think he means business ****

car."

"

"Why was the period between 500 | and 1200, A. D. known as the Dark Agen 1 asked the teacher,

'Becaus replied the sleepy student, those were the days of knights."

*

We are told of the good mother who was disturbed ove; her son, who had been in Italy studying for three years "I am so afraid he'll get so Itali cized he won't come home

Three small boys with spades and buckets were building model motor cars in the sand. The first boy had piled and patted the sand into a passable semblance of a racing car, the second had made a touring car, but the third boy's construc- tion was without shape or form.

425

"What sort of car is that ask ed an old man. It looks like two or three cars all together."

That's just what it is," replied the little chap, loftily. "It's a collision."

Daughter: "I'm sure he does; ba represents a motor firm, and wants Daddy to buy me a new car."-

Big Man in Audience (turning round) Can't you Be any: thing !

Little Man: "Can't see a streak of the stage.

Big Man" Why, then, I'll tell Fou what to do. You keep your eye on me and laugh when I do."

The retired officer had been en- deavouring to entertain his pretty partner with all the details of some event or other in his past life.

As course followed course" the windy tale went on till, in triumphant, tones, he concluded: "And so, you see, I was vindicated at last."

"How thrilling" said the lia- tener, smothering a yawn. “I sup pose they made you wear a red tape on your arm until the swelling went down."

CROSSWORD PUZZLE.

1

2

*

18

17

1.0

1

9

10

13 14

JS

10

20

1

27

24

16.

31.

39

35.

30

37

28

30

*

13

94

30

דיי

41

42

:

·44:

45

48

48

11

50

W

51

52

Across. 1-Now cut of office, but not this

one..

8-It constricts.

-If this is great it is believed

to be extinct,

11.-Ideal for summer cruises. 13-Chaucer'a knight was this. 15. Wherein many winder but

none can remain. 16-Cain was the first, 18-A useful person after August

19.

"

1.The brst name of a lady who

had a way with her. -Change ita preta and it

. would be western.

Let them be thy country's and thy God's, says Shake- speare ·

28-In certain circumstances pre-

cedes repentance. 29.-He was very rich. 31.-Shelley wrote an ode to this. 39. Might be theism of London. 55.-Add 500 and it is int.

38. This was much criticised in

our latest stamps.

40-A poetic equivalent to "fed

up.'

43.-The comparative of a great explorer who did act up to his

BLADES.

44.A writer who has at least never lived down to his

даше.

46. This tree

Was Bear

the

Marble Arch, and many trai

tors new it

48.-The American use the latter

half of our cheer.

49.-A fruit which may be shot. 30.-A Greek sea divinity merely to pronounce whote name as- sorts knowledge...".

19. Varies in fluids and in our

fellows

20. If you place "p" before this

you have been forward. 1-If you change the last letter

you may bear with this. 22-The lowest point. 24-John in the Highlands. 25.-Everything else in abbrevia-

tion.

26.It is the fate of the gas to be

this.

97.-Excellent when stewed, 30. The prophet declared this

would be exalted. 33-Follow this and you'll end

somewhere.

34-The hero of a Russian opera. 37-Part of an archbishop's signa

ture.

38.-One of those U.S.A, 20. You can do this with your

elbow,

40.—May mean summoned or just

quoted.

41.—This, is the 33 down of the

planets.

49.-A river in

Bouth-western

Eurone known to Hannibal and Napoleon.

43.Don't be a tight one. 47-The solitary heroine of an

Elizabethan poem.

YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.

DRIFTS WIRBAL

PIA}

LALTBI

51.-Once ruled in Venice. 52-What you need for deduction WALL

Down 1.Think of the dove.

2.-The second actor in the most

famous scene...at. Trafalgar. Marley was one, and no wai Marner.

4-When you're in your this

you're happy.

L

-If what you do is this you

may not be good but you're safa

S. A goddess with her head in

the wrong place.

Gilbert the Filbert was famous one 8Think of 1-down... 10.A killer of the air 19He who this a thing certainly

does not look forward to it. 14-He was translated but has

lost his last letter, 16-This milk is not rich in food

valebitasse

77 You make fast with these.

JA

IT

[IBEX} } ILOEN ALPS

RIE BN CON

URE

IDDONS ANNOYED TYBO TE TAGS | TALLIGATOR |I| ABBET B ANY RHUBARBULET SIR SOT NTS ENE GAOL PENCE ARTS

FAST

MEA

THE I

HONG KONG DAILY PRESS. TUESDAY, AUGUST 13, 1929.

THE FAMILY ALBUM-CROSSED WIRES

By GLUYAS WILLIAMS

CALLS UP COUSIN EF- FIE TO SEE HOW UTILE EGBERT'S COLD IS COMING ALONG

SHOUTS UPSTAIRS FOR MILDRED OR WILFRED

EXPLAINS TO COUSIN EF FE HE WASN'T SHOUT-

SHOUTS. IF IT'S THE LAUNDRY MAN TELL. HIM TO WAIT HE WANTS. TO SEE HIM

TO ANSWER THE DOORING AT HER. HE WAS ·

BELL

TRYING TO GET SOME- "ONE TO 6G TO THE DOOR

LISTENS WITH ONE BAR TO COUSIN EFFIE AND WITH THE OTHER TO HEAR. WHO'S AT THE POOR

TUNES IN ON COUSIN. EF-*- TRIES SIMULTANEOUSLY TO RË AGAIN JUST AS ・・・ ASSURE COUSIN EFFIE TRAT WIFE CALLS THE MAN, HE IS PAVING ATTENTION. TO...... SAYS HE CANT WAIT ESSERTS SYMPTOMS, AND TO WHAT DOES HE WANT. - TELL LAUNDRYMAN NIT, TO-

(Copyright, 1929, by The Ball Syndicate, Inc.)

PUT STARCH IN HIS SHIRTS

FINDS THAT COUSIN EMNE HAS HUNG UP

ÎN A HUFF AND LAUNDRY MAN HAS GONE WITHOUT THEI

MESSAGE.

SPORT AND ATHLETICS.

YACHTING IN PEHANG.

·BALDOCK AND BROWN, About a year ago an effort was Teddy Baldock, bantam-weight made at Penang to form a yacht champion of Great Britain and club but the project failed owing Lonsdale belt holdez, received a to lack of support. Now there fcabled offer from Mr. Jesse Me

distinct possibility that Penang will be able to boast of such a club, Four enthusiasts, Messrs. Wills Johnston, W. Dobree, P. Schou- valoff and R. H. P. Laugharne, have received two yachts from the makers in Hong Kong. The cost of each yacht, which is 14 feet in length, is $275, Hong Kong cur- repey With two persons sharing yacht the cost, including freight and insurance to Penang, to each owner is approximately 3125 Straits | currency. With such reasonable initial cost it seems certain that others will follow these four pioneer yachtamen, and that before long Penang will have a strong live club. OUP HOLDERS AT SONNING.

The annual open mixed foursomes golf tournament for the challenge: Walter V. Rivers trophy, was played

749

AIRMEN ON THE TRACK.

Henlow won the team championship at the Royal Air Force champion- ship meeting, which concluded at Uxbridge, with a total of fifty-two paints. Halton were second with forty-three and Uxbridge third with forty-one. The junior title went to Gosport with forty points; Sealdon second with thirty-five points.

Mabon, the New York promoter formerly associated with the late, Tex Rickard, inviting him to go to New York at the earliest possible date to meet Ar Brown, the Panama negro, in a contest for the bantam- In the Edgware palice sports, at weight championship of the world. Canans Park, Edgware, F. C. H. Mr. Joe Morris, Baldock's manager, Barber, Watford H., won the mile told The Sporting Life that be ac from 143 yards in imino. saeca, M. cepted the proposition provided H. Messenger, New Barnet A.C. that suitable terms could be arrang-1 (7)yrds.), the 100 yards, in the fast ed. He did not withdraw from his time of 9.4-5secs.; G. E. Wither, stand that Baldock was the world's Edgware A.0 (60yds.), the half title holder as well as British cham-mile, in 1min. 57.4-5secs.; and F. A. pion, by virtue of his defeat of Jones, Essex Beagles (18yds.), the Archie Bell in London a content furlong, in 321-4sers.'

then vacant title; but In the Tobacco Trade A.A sporta for the

Baldock was willing to box any at the Herne Hill track, the Ormen claimant to the crown, if only the Sperring Cup was won by Ardath by money was right. He wanted to one point from the British American held the title undisputed,

Tobacco Company, the Imperial To McMahon proposes to stage the bucco Company being third with 19 match at Ebbetts Sield, Brooklyn, points with one point fower. The at Sonning-on-Thames, recently. New York, as one of the outstand individual-aggregate trorby went to Among the 70 entries was R. C. Ellising evente of the summer sport sen R. Wiggins (Civic). (Beaconsfield), the former England son." boy captain, who, partnered with Mr. Adams (Beaconsfield), won. last year. They did not combine, well, however, and their morning score was 881 act. In the afternoon no improvement was shown, and they made no return.

The winners were C. H. Brickhill and Mrs, Vernon Rivers, a daughter- in-law of the donor of the trophies, entered from Sonning With a com- bited handicap of 121, they returned 78) and 75 for an aggregate of 154.

The scratch prize winners were H. J. Tanburn (St. Augustine's, Ramsgate), and Mrs. V. G. Davies, wife of the English rugby player.

· HALLIFORD REGATTA.

The cup for the best performance at the sports of the Pearl Assurance Club, at New Falden, was awarded The Halliford and Shepperton to P. Evenden, who, beides win- Regatta was decided on a recent ning the 440 yards race from scratch Saturday, when the chief feature in 54.3-5seca, 6nished third off four was the success of the Thames yards to W. H. Webley (lyds.) in Valley Skiff Club, who carried off the 100 yards.

the women's and mixed double W. J Bigg, a Finchley Harrier, sculls, while the Skiff Club and scored a double in the mile and half- Dittons S. and P.C. scored wins in mile events at the Bexley Heath the junior doables and junior-senior Town sports, winning the former doubles.

from 57yds. in 4mins. 31.4-5secs, and the latter in 9ming, 5.2-secs. from 58yds.

Miss B. Styles won the women's sculls, and J. G. A. Whitehead the junior sculla.

The first and second fours of at Kew, similar "crews from Hailey University College School defeated, bury School,

THE WOMAN'S CORNER.

KEEP YOUR HEAD NEAT, preserving a hair treatment, Cez-

HARD WATER AND WASH DAY.

Every one knows that soft ́'water is better for vash-day, and particu larly for the rinsing,

When soap is added to hard water an insolable matter is formed by the combination of soap and the "hardness" of the water.

When soapy fabrics are rinsed.in tainly a helmet has much to recom- hard water this curdy matter is mead it, but one essential precau-formed in the material; and it is tion must be observed,

Dot removed. If forms a coating

It must not be laced up tightly, that is objectionable. It spoils the or the created dampness will farten feel of the material, and may out even a permanent wave. Every hold dirt last-bound underneath. opportunity should be taken to re- The ideal is to use rain water move the helmet altogether. or water specially softened in the Bometimes precautions are taken chemical softeners now sold in many too late, and the beautiful waves shops "are ruefully discovered in a wonder- ful tangles

Bale for Golour.

Modern Eve motors, and motors fast, too! She will cheerfally ruin an expensive hair treatment for thrill, and usually takes small thought for the beauty of her ahingle. ́ ́› Hairdressers market a shingle net cap with very fine meat, which is indispensible to a woman motorist.

One of the chief virtues of the

But for washing cloths & satisfne- net cap is that it lies almost among For a Marcel wave, comb very tory softening of water is easily the hair, and it is quite possible to carefully from tips to roots, break achieved. Dissolve half an ounce of have the restraining influence of the ing he few hairs as possible. A washing soda in a little hot water, cap and to wear a hat on the top little good brilliantine, clear if pos and add this to each five gallons of of it.

sible, should be brushed in at the water of ordinary hardness For Heavy mileages have an uncom- same time.

waters only moderately hard use fortable sequel, however. They seem to search out all the stray same procedure should be followed, for very hard water use double the If the waves are permanent the only half the quantity of soda, and ends, and when one wishes to dress but instead of using brilliantine quantity, particularly well at some good-class damp the comb with water and hotel, the anruly strands rain the press the waves into position. whold effect.

D

Storm Vells for Speeding.

As a guide in mesurement, a large bucket holds two gallons, and a tablespoonful of washing uda If a mosquito bites your face, weights about one ounce The atorm veil is the cure for this, arm or ankle, dab a little eau The use of water softened this It need not be ugly any colour de Cologne on the puncture and way for washing and rinsing will be scheme can be matched-and any gently rub it in, Swelling and pain found a great advantage. If only Eprejudices will soon be overcome by will be prevented entirely, or lessen the amount of soda mentioned is sheer comforted in extent and severity by the anused there is no free soda left, and Many women are of the opinion tiseptic action of the alcohol in the to the water is safe for washing that a helmet is the ideal means of, scent.

coloured goods, silks and woollens

K DENACEU LUGOUG L ADED

ROMANCE! PATHOS! DRAMA!

An unusual Continental film with a thousand

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THE

DANCER

OF BARCELONA

starring

LILY DAMITA

The famous French screen star

AND A LARGE SUPPORTING CAST.:

AT THE

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A startling story of modern marriage, from the novel sensation by Rex Beach!..

THE

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with

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TO-DAY & TO-MORROW

5.159.20.

AT THE

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-2.80 & 7.15 Chinese Picture, "Love's Sacrifice"

A CHARMING Woman, a man with a weakness for women, and Marion as the Cardboard Lover". to save him from his weakness!

MARION DAVIES

THE

CARDBOARD LOVER

AT THE

STAR

TO-DAY & TO-MORROW

BEFORE YOU

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At 5.30 & 8.20.

Send your Overseas Address to 11, Ice House Street, and order the Weekly Press to be sent to you for

Three Months

Six Months

Twelve Months

LUCKY TELEPHONE

ERROR

BLOODHOUND SENT OUT

$3.75 $ 7.50 $15.00

Bucka Green, Rudgeek, instead of to Bucks Barn, West Grinstead..

~ When the police arrived at Rudget, wich they went to the sub-postmas-- ter, auspecting the error, and there discovered that the post office. hidi beer entered daring the night. The post office safe was found be hind a hedge a few yards to the rear of the premises. The bäck had. boen ripped off, and the contents

about 230-were missing, The bloodhound took up the scent from the safe and led the officers had been heard in the grounds. to the Horsham-Guildford Road.

A bloodhound was at once sent There it lost the scent. The bourd off by the Chief Constable of West was then taken back to Sedgwick Busa, Captain-Williams, but by Park and took up another scent, some mistake the hound" went to "but failed to keep on the trail

A remarkable discovery of a borg Jary through the mishearing of a telephone message was reported from Mid-Sussex par

The Horsham police received in formation from Sedgwick Park, the residence of Mrs. Henderson, about midnight that suspicious footsteps