1961-10-14 — Page 5

THE

DUSTLER

لية

VALET

BOOK-HOUSE KRIPEG

OHAN

When

truth about wo- men is something that men rarely admit, even to themselves.

11

simply. that they Pour into the world properly equipped for the tricky bitsl ness of living. Men do not,

1r

We tend to take a Wein: 's

markable gifts granted.

our lives

are well or- dered, plea- al

amusing, wo like 10 take

the credit,

Bu there comes a time

your wife

leaves you

all alone

HOUSEMAID MASTROS

UNIVERSAL KUNT

LAUNDDYMAN.

ANGUS MCGILL'S MAINLY FOR MEN

when the most safely married nun comes fere to face with brutal reality. Fi wife Joins her mother in an attempt m the wuth face of Gauri Sinkar or the dogs to Middlesbrough for refresher evarse on pub- le speaking, sanitary englüter- lug and ower arrangement. He

It is know, an awful mo- ment, but life must go on. The days must be fared. And with

a little help and a few master-

ful selephone calls

you call

Survive almost unscathed. Let me make some suggestions.

Waking

First of all you musi wake up in the morning. Titis

is

THE SHEEP is one of man's most constant friends.

It feeds us, clothes us, jumps over stiles to send us to sleep. Personally, I think the sheep is ill-advised to be so lavish-but I'm grateful ali the same, especially for sheepskin jackets like this one by Charles Creed. Warm, comfortable, elegant-just made for the yearling sales or the races ond can be worn around town, too Looks expensive and is. The price: 44 guineos.

are hard to And--but if you live clever things to ragged turn. Don't be put off. They do men's reasonably centrally the Bel- ups and alterations within ren- shoes, too.

gravia Agency in Brompton són. Road will have one on your doorstep before you can shout II-E-L-P.

Their ladies charge

an hour plus fares."

4s. 60.

Or you can do the thing the grand manner and hire or rather, lake into your empley women do better than men. a butler, a cook-housekeeper

one of the many things which

can't recommend ulurm

valet and a housemaid.

a

If you are literally left hold- ing the baby ring Universal Or at four of Sketchley's Aunts."

The will provide branches you can have

your proxy-mother for the bairo. suit sponged and pressed while you wait. They wrap you in They will baby-sit for you, dressing gown, sit you

in u shop for you, lock after pets for dressing room, give you a cup you, all in an celent, sooth

and ing, puntly way. of tea and a cigercile back to you in under half at bring your rejuvenated suit hour-all for 10s. 6d.

תה

clocks. I've never found one The buller will cost about If you face a shirt crisis most ford enough that went on long £9 week and all found. He laundries operate enough. The easiest thing is an will take complete charge of shirts in 48 hours at 35. 6d. a express service. The Sunlight people do Alarm call from your tele your household and you may phone. Dial INF and the Post get a mention in his memoirs, time. If you can't wait 48 hours

Bee will ring until you get

either drip-dry one yourself or out of bed.

go out and buy a new one.

Cook-housekeepers cost about

If you begrudge the sixpence £ a week, vafeis get about this will cust you, you ebull £6, housemaids about £5. The adapt a method invented by an their rooms.

women must have television in uld aunt of mine in 1940.

The men Bren't so purifculur.

She was deaf and could not hear the air gold siren. So the threaded a piece ut sting through her bedroom window and to her neighbour's. She tied her and round her big toe. When the siren went the neigh- Lour gave a good hard pull. It never falled my aunt.

Cleaning

If you don't think you can live up to a valet you can let the dry-cleaners look after your They Bre very

Next you must get someone clothes.

to do some cleaning. Good uld- obliging these days. They nol fashioned chars willing to come only clean suits but they repair Just for a week or a fortnight-them,

sew buttons on,

A British Crossword Puzzle

15 6

20

125

9

11

12

113

14

18 19

21

22

26

27

29

30

31

32 33

34 35

36

37

38

30

40

DOWN

1 Are important.

Fires bags of people?

2 Man-eater.

Era.

3 Shed.

4 cachea.

5 Express.

0 Operate.

7 Marilente,

B Acarinato.

15 Aquatic animal.

ACROSS

1 Penally blemishes,

10 Letior,

11 Teach about transport?

12 Tucked In,

13 Figure,

14 She has a point!

10 Twisted.

18 Sampled.

21 Measure.

20 Nervous (two words).

23 And Ends?

20 Beverage,

31 Hlave belug

32 Then brown.

34 Wallop.

30 Skins.

37 Fold.

36 Fly poing17

31 Movie.

40 Water pipes!

17 For catching perch?

19 Trouble.

20 Follow closely, pet!

22 Persan.

20 Freis one has Avet

31 Stops.

27 Titles.

20 Hend.

20 Profundity.

30 High spots.

33 Plant.

96 Intoxicant.

If all your shoes develop holes simultaneously, which in what shoes tend to do, you can sit in your socks on a high stool in Oxford Street and have then repaired while you walt.

Playing

A Brm called the Norman operates as a sort of Universal Courtney Guide Escort Services

Uncles,

and

They will babywil poodle-sit and shop

for you, too, but their speciality is to provide escorts,

So if you are lonesome, and you think your wite Won't Norinan Courtney will The shop lo called Shoceralt mind, and most of your fellow provide a girl for the evening customera will be girls get stunning creature to take

motherly Lou! seen to. to town,

listen while you talk, an easily

amused girl to laugh at your jokes, an intellectual, musica kirl to agree with you about Schoenberg.

ting their

stilettes

TARGET

do

VET

YESTERDAY'S. CROSSWORD ––Bernas) 3 Gtter, 7 Alture, Antlern, 9' Cast, 11 Skip, 12 Blege. 16 Feel, 18 Abel, 14 enew, 18 Flat, 10 Plen, 1 Coroner, 24 Aster, 22 Dessert. Down: 1 Jack, 2 Backes. 3 Graap. Lant 6 Telltale. Burst, 10 Allexons 11 Sec, 13 Abaslied, 14 Gat, 10 #load, Fira, 20 Pear, 20 Find.

#OG

NRM

E

How many

worda ut Jotters

or 'mnote rad

Fon make from the letters in the aquar

the 'left7 tit making the wordi Pateuch **istler Tamson nay be 'dard

ance only. Each word mILIE COU In the large letter, and there innat de af ledas'ogo zen-letter word to the list.“ No pluralk : fa foreign words; na: proper names. TODAY'S TARGET: 22 words.

word, en

kordi, exceffent.** Bolution on Monday.

YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION: City clay ropy puppity play crypto cis ivory lory 'iyèso biff' polley Ballly buitis. Brivly privily Frot troy type tyre Tictory-

London Expices Service.

This will cost you from six to len guineas an evening- and a chummy, platonle even- ing is all It entitles you to.

One way and another, your wife's little Jaunt is going to cost you money at every turn. But that's another thing about women, Present er übsent they are expensive. But worth—you' may think as your returning wife turns her key in the door....... every penny.

TIEUTENANT - COLONEL

SANTOS CASSINI took ble budgerigar lo a wine-tasting the other day. I'm afraid my Duclo Perezrine was rather par Toys."

JACOBY BRIDGE

on

ONE of the Orst plays taught

the beginner is the duck. There are all sorts of reasquis for the duck play, but the prin cipal ones to destroy the enemy's line of communica tion.

West opens

uf the log spades against South's "three no-trump contract. South counts up seven sure winters -- four in diamonds and tho other three aces. He sees that he will have to go after the club sult, to bring home his couiract and that if the club Anesse Igies, the defenders will be able to make some epaile tricks.

It is the perfect spot for the duck play, and South holds off

V&CORD, Sense44

The bidding has been! North

Bool Wegi

IA

You, Sout), hold: A WIT JEAN!** ****

What do you dor Ammaak. In spite at the tan you hold some kood diamonda Your

FORATI QUESTION (You hold she same hand. Your partner And Phil Pan kier. *Went" two half" bid 1941 89

Anawer on Monday

WEST AKAJIE K15 703

NARTH

208 No77

•K 1003 ARTE

FAST 4782

*kyo

SQUTU (D) AADS

AGI 430043 No en vulnerabio Hopih, West Nort

INT. PAL Fast Fa

Opening jead-ėK

spades until the third land Then he Itads the tea of clube and lets it ride for nesÉT. ho does not have a spade left, Edit takes he king and, since Fast leads heart.

The port finesse represents * luxury at South cannot afford. He can make nine tricke by going up with the age of liestis while a sistemul heart Aticano Will merely give him Averkriok, a losing heart fliesse will West Joto the lead. Whatzous Waai will make bila two sondes good.

He guarded his glass of Nebbiolo Spumante in an un- preessarily conspicuous planner. That bird's not selilng, a drop of this, I can' tell you." h muttered.

Colonel Cassini's budgerigar Is a civilised bird who likes a drop of wine but I agreed that there was do point in spreading be best alum around.

Nebbiolo Spumante is a do- licious sparkling red wine, rood enough to sef ́ you dancing ta the streets. It costs 17s. 6d. a bottle.

-(London Exp;rena Service},

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