1958-01-18 — Page 7

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A MAN ON POLITICS...

THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, JANUARY 18, 1958.

TOO MUCH GOING ON

ore and me. Rival views are of the Leader or the

Tworrying them trenchantly expresed (as I Minister.

selves on holiday. understand).

The Mininter rises

at

same

OT

Arc

LOCKED

WILLIAM BARKLEY

by WILLI

BEHIND DOORS!

Will he won't he, fall off · They are asking what is

to thut tightrope which he pro- wrong with Parliament, address them with a quiet mixed in private to walk?

montion of the national Will he keep his balance? Why are back Interest being the

For his part-"hurrah!" renounco membership of THE Tories should do bet. In this well-tried. old process enchers nearly all thing as party unity; a

ter than that. They would even grow big. "little men" nowadays? voters

delicate reminder that the or rather "hear, heart-he the 1922 Committee.

expertly says nothing for

have Parties today Gloucester

It is hopeless to expect should' state their differ David Price wants to Ipswich or Rochdale three-quarters of an hour the same sacrifice from the encca bokily, in publiči „de- neurosis about splits. They are in terror of washing streamline the pro- watching them (which the and is greeted with raptur- Socialists, because they have bate,

are not allowed to ous applause for his achieve a one-party State mentality.

their dirty linen in public. re so that they don't voters

ment in not saying any-

They regard the party as We should then return to Let them not be surprised thing. Fecome whole-time do).

the Parliament. At one time the conditions when a then if the public loses professionals.

Then perhaps a delicato

My New Year's Resolu- they even had hopes that Minister is influenced by Interest. reminder that he is leaving tion for Price, Gough, and their, private meetings discussion and even changes My advice Is-Hang out Frederick Gough would three days later for all Tory back-benchers who could be regarded as privi- his views under public the washing on the Cam- lip the beaks of cx- Washington or that he want Parliament to renew leged, although the Consti- pressure. Little men would mona line. Give us a sight Ministers to give small came back two days ago its real meaning and force tution does not recognise then cease to be rubber- of these little unmention- men a better chance in big from Bonn. Is this a time fulness is that they should parties.

stamps, and some of them ables of debate, to rock the bont?

debates.

Some complain of wast- ing 14 minutes' walking through EL division lobby when the thing could be

Dexterity

ure

done in no time by electrle MEANWHILE five a side buttons. (Come to elec- in the actual House of tronics,

Chamber why not make a Commons couple of hundred button- discussing, it may be, the pressures on the first day safeguarding of gas mantles and use one record a night or enamelled hollow-ware. for the rest of the session?) When the House is crammed

A WOMAN ON POLITICS...

WEEKEND Friell

LIBERAL HO Candidate Selection ·

Board

a

"Boothby and Foot--they're booked already aren't they?"

البينا السيدة

ليبية لجدة

CABINET ROOM

by ANNE EDWARDS

"Perhaps you should fly to Malta, Lennox. Go by way of Albania and that should give us a breathing

space."

My advice to Moira Shearer

Let me tell them. What to capacity later for the WEAR your red shoes, H-bomb debate or the Suez W dear. That's the ad-

public interest is in the dexterity vice I'm handing out to the

is going wrong with Parlia ment is that it is spending its time in perpetual secret session.

It is a bit thick to com- | plain that the public is losing interest

in its pro- ceedings when the public and the newspapers лге excluded from its debates.

It used to be a very for midable procedure to hold a secret session, involving a mution to spy strangers and one thing and another. Now it happens about twice nightly without any for- mality.

Suppose (and that's easy) that the Socialist Party la divided about making the II-bomb. Everybody knows, and could give, almost complete list of the parti- sans for both views.

Rival groups meet. Strong views are hurled across tea- cups. Whips panic. What face is the party going to show when it comes to the debate in the House?

Ranks closed

THE Leader, calls a private party meeting. A bit- ter debate is held and is adjourned until tomorrow morning.

This is the debate that I should be reporting on your behalf. Huh! It is conduct- el entirely to the advant age of my radar-eyed col- league Derek Marks, who can see through stone walls and hear every word a mile away.

When next morning the Socialist Party reads what It has been saying it closes the ranks. Gaitskell or Bevan is empowered to make 1 compromise statement which will neither annoy nor enlighten anybody.

Suppose (alas! too easy) that the Tory Party is divided on Suez. Two groups form in secret, one pressing forward, the other backward.

Horrors Are they going to show a split in public? The Tory Party must never split.

Where's the chairman of the '22 Committee? (That fa the body, first set up in 1922, which includes the whole of the Tory back-

benchers. It is not a com- mittee at all. It is the whole caboodle.)

In no time the committee In sitting and politely re questing a visit from the Prime Minister or Foreign Secretary who, of course, can hardly be held back at

the door all this time in his anxiety to burst in on them.

M

i

The Minister then hours

a splendid parliamentary de-

bate which is forbidden ground to you (the cloctors)

issue, the

only

POCKET CARTOON: by OSBERT LANCASTER

"and what's the betting that the first person w meet when we get there will be Jolia Foster Dulles nking enemies and in fluencing penguins?"

GP

GP

latest and most glamorous Candidate's Wife Miss Moira Shearer.

"Of course I shall go to Rochdale," announced the dazzling Miss Shearer, now that her husband Ludovic Kennedy has

been nominated us Liberal can- didate for the town. "I shall give Ludo all the help

Can."

I

If you'll take my advice, Miss Shearer, you'll put on the style

At lengt it will bring a little of

She's prepared. I'm sure, to of this hall knowing a

than ·when he make little speeches, But is the more briefed on dodging the questions in. that coms after them

litle knock on, whatever bazanes you cams open, I personally doubt if it will make a diference of one- Of course, she's ready to lick half to one per cent to the way envelopes and fold posters and they vole. "What does your husband knock on doors, sid interrupt intend doing about the lighting hardworking women, to folk In Midsummer-lanot" "What is about her husband, but crashe your party doing about .the' Catholic schools?”

do it without doubting that it's "When are all for their own good?' you going to come and look at our leaking roof?"

Is the prepared when stuck for an answer to spoon out the usual soothing syrup. "It's matter that is worrying him a Hood deal.. very close to his heart it returned at this lection I am sure he will take

it up.

She's prepared, of course, to sit on platforms and listen to your personal sparkic to this her husband making speeches soggy town of greasy cobble. stones,

And wear

your red sheas. They may help to beat off that feeling of being inadequate be- side the women who have to work there.

Lots to it

FOR there's a lot to being

candidate's wife-especially this kind of candidate's wife in this kind of town--that I suspect Miss Shearer doesn't suspect.

CP

A

3

Is she prepared too, I won- der, to listen to him making the same speech 20 different Umes and never, never lose her glow of respectful admiration, or let on that what she's really think ing is: "Cripes, he's on to that bli about tariffs again.

11

And she'll know all about having get-togethers and cups of tea and home-made cakes and talking about children, and have

her Molra-but ng them call dous she know anything about crossing the unbridgeable gap that divides these stout; homely women in macintoshes from her elin, delicate, expensive, sophisticated Httle person?

Be yourself!

and

MY advice, Miss Shearer, ts to drop. the usual candi- date's wife. approach, along tha candidate's wife's with

sober tweed specially-bought evat and cheap hat, and just be yourself. They'll suspect you for Is she sure she can Emile trying to be like them. They'll proudly every time she hears love you for being yourself he husband squash

red hair, a heckler for your wonderful with the same old repartee: "It your smart clothes, your lovely the Kentleman who keeps inter face, your fame, your success.

And whatever speeches you rupting would stop tuliding and

you start listening, he might go out make, whatever doors

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POCKET CARTOON by OSDERT LANCASTER

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D

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