1957-12-14 — Page 21

⠀ THE · CHINA · MAIL," SATURDAY, DECEMBER 14, ~ 1957, 1

Pago 21

N

Hongkong Christmas Carol

TOW it happens a few Christmasses ago that a few of us are in the old "Brakepit" that used to be in Queen's Road. And the reason we are there is because we are lonely. And the reason we are lonely is because our ever loving and faithful wives are in England. To stop ourselves from busting out crying, wo are having a few snoois, and around about twelve o'clock, one character known as Harry has a inspiration. He says, "Fellow drinkers, although we are sad on account of the absence of our over loving and faithful wives, neverthe less we will sing some carols. It will help us to think we are rejoined with our family,"

This proposal causes a little gument on account of one or

198

N

characters who are not anxloun to have their ever loving and faithful wives with them. Nevertheless, there gerol agreement that we s some carols. We choose Bill to lead the singing on account of his having been in the church cholr.

his throat, and

tells the boy to go on pouring. It has got me." So 1 take a drinks. In fact " I said, "if you then be clears says thus,

One way and another (says Bob) I have been here fifty years. Why, when I am first ere, you could see the Harbour reach right up to here to this road.

Well, as you know, I go into business with old Marley, and

when I arrive he gives me a bit of good advice which if I take,

I would now be

By Jaye

means such

a one

by no will wish you a "Merry Christ mus."

Elle

n

'multi-

us millionaire and not trying to scratch along on a few millicen as I am now.

wish you to that certain place. In fact, he is more likely to

He is never known to buy anyone a drink or sign n chit in his life,

It is not because be has to been out money, for he has here years, and although things ure not so good lately, he is by no means down to his last million.

We sing "The First Noer which has some lovely harmony, but the young pendiring on duty in Queen's Road who has no ear fe imuste comes in and starts to give us a little argument. So the next thing we know is B has thrown in out in the street. 1311 belig musicut, is also highly teinperement: 1

most OS Arc musicians,

The next thing we know is n truck load of gendarmes arrive from Central and who should be in charge but obi Guzzle Gus.

well," he says, "how Yo he says, "ll we lack will all do me Is a snowstorm."

"Now," says Harry, you must be reusonable. And It r know my law, you cnnnot arrest us for singing carols on Christmas Eve."

Now I

sve that this reference to points of the law will get us nowhere as our local Gendarmes are very touchy when a private citizen tries to Instruel them in the law,

But what surprises us more ls, Bob shouts out, "I wish you each and everyone a happy Christmas, and pray that you the honour of Joining me in a drink."

There is an immediate rush to the bur, but Harry clops the bums, and mentions Bob just wishes to show his appreciation of the choir,

No, no," says Bob, "I mean everyone, con including these

bums,'

At this Gus looks worried and I see him reach for his hand Cuffs. "He bus gone mad," says Gus.

"Have a drink, Guy" 1 may, "Well," says Gus, "seeing it is Christmas and I am Just off duty

July if it were not for youre Kuys, i will. Furthermore," he says. "I will take second tenor But Bob pushes his way to the in the next carol because when confer and pulls out I come down the road I notice course roll of lovely that you are a bit thin in your hundred dollar bills, harmony."

So after a few more noggins wr strike up "Good King Wen- eclas" and although I say it anyself, we gather a very large aydience around the bar, and when I lake the solo about the poor geezer who has no seratch und is ou gathering firewood, at least two customers. break down crying.

nice

red

I un greatly surprised and push my way over to Bob. I say, "Well Bob, It is indeed a pleasure and a privilege to have you drinking with us, also to have your volee in our beautiful choir, although," I say, "I resent your criticism about our harmony being a bit thin.”

"One should not resent, especially Christmas time," says Bos.

"But," I sty, "what surprises

me is to And you down here.

why, I thought you would have b.en all tucked away your numble twenty rooms abode up on the Peak."

why, su

1 was," said Bob, you know, usually

"for as

By this time, Guzzle Gus is well warmed up and says my one who wishes to stop such beautiful harmony on Christinus Eve must be a very wrong type and that Gus will personally loathe and despise such charac- escort him to the Can should

as yourself. In fact, to- any such interfere,

Ballist was just another grat

ilreum Li

about until I have eleven o'clock."

"If you like," he says, "I will tell you about it."

We now sing "Silent Night and sotme American authors who claim they are in Golden Bowl Philharmonic Choir are allowed to join in without re- I lock round, but it seems as ference to their credentials. ![ our carol party is over co We are just resting before account of our choirmaster being whllo starting up Christians Awake" asleep under the table, when suddenly R character the Brst tenor is conducting the shouls to us, "A Merry Christ- U.S. navy In "Carry me back to mas."

old Virginie." We all look up and

"All right," I says to Bob, "50 greally astonished

long as the drinks keep coming to see

your Now the reason long, I will listen to wo are surprised is that undoubtedly interesting story." although he is u

So Bob pushes well known

his pile of character in Hongkong, he is notes further

bar and up the

arc

o

Dab Scrooge.

HAMILTON

EVEN THE MAN

WHO HAS

EVERYTHING"

DOES NOT HAVE A

WATCH

LIKE THIS

IT'S THE

WORLD'S

FIRST

Electric Watch

"Never give

Old Marley says to me

sucker an even break. Never cign a chit if the other fellow reaches for it. And pever subscribe to anything or buyone!

Well, as you see, I have done my beat to live up to these high sounding principles unill to night.

as usual, and

"Well, tonight. I close my office round about five partake of my usual evening meal of a hot dog and a glass of milk at the Dairy Farm, and feeling generous on account of 1 being Christmas, I wish the stoff one and all a "Merry Christmas."

I then was to the Peak Tram and as I am taking home my ledger and bank-book to do a bit of light reading tomorrow, I indulge, in a taxt when I reach the top.

This piece of foolishness costs me a dollor, and then the driver has the confounded effrontery to wall for a tip. I think it this that upset me and led to my strange experiences of the night.

WOS

I go to bed about nine to avoid the iniquitous charges of the light people and fall asleep almost immediately when all on b. mudden. I am awakened by someone shaiding me.

I sit up, and although it t duck, I can see it is my old partner, Sam Marley.

for

looks, and sure enough weighted down with of coarse $500 bills.

ho is are worried about 'all your bundles money, I am anxious to accom- modate you right now. In fact, "Why Sam," I say, "If that I am prepared to accept a thous

all

you are complainingt sand from you an the spot." about, I will take some

"No," said Bob, "that would these immediately, and then nover do. I would get no per- you can go back to the cemetery centage off the ghost for putting and continue your well deserved money your way. What I in- rest,

tend to do is to reform from "Bob Scrooge,"

he says, "I now on and 'cut in all the local have come to warn you that it charities for a fair percentage. doesn't matter how much dough That way, I am assured of a you make here, if you don't long and happy life." spread it around a lie, you another round of drinks. So we

And with that he bure u never sleep, Why, I have not raise our glasses and Harry calls hed one night's sleep since you out, "A long and happy life to take me to Happy

"Now." he Bays, come lo warn you. you don't stop your pencil shy hobits, and If you don't mix a bit with your fellow men, then you will soon join me and have Bucli miserable time as I am having now." With vanishes.

Valley:

it

bave

you, Bob,"

Bob says, "Thank you, gentle- men," and walks out straight Into a taxi which knocks him half way up Queen's Road,

That is all there is to that Christmas Eve, but the moral seems to be that the mistake that he Bob mode was to think that a Hongkong ghost was on the

Well I am not much worried, level. except I am very cross with him for vanlahing with all that] money on him. So I turn over and go to sleep.

All on

a sudden, another character shakes me, and when I look up I see another ghost,

At that I am real angry and about to ring for my boy and bawl him out for letting theso hosts in, when the spirit says. "I am the ghost of the past"

With that he whips me down. the Peak ilke lightning. and there is Hongkong just like it is when I first arrive,

I

quite young again dressed like an Edwardian toff, and talking to old Sam who is not old then, by the way.

We have just done down a few widows and orphans, and old Sum is sa; ing, "I will t;cat you to 'ha best Kines of lemonade the Club serves.“ 1 wake up yelling, and the boy comes into the room complain- Ing I am frightening the ser- vants,

So I turn Over and go to sleep and think maybe the hot-dog I eat for my dinner is a bit too sumptuous a meal. The next thing I know in the xhost is back and says he is the ghost of the present, the

ami somewhat surprised. personally remember escorting old Sam to cemetery.

"Why Sam," I say, "while I am indeed glad to see you, I am

Further- somewhat surprised. more." I say "I do not think the authorities will be pleased to know you are AWOL from the cemetery without permis-

sion."

Al that, old Sam gives a kind of groan, and I can see right through him which gives me a bit of a start.

"Bob Scrooge," he says, "all you and me think about when

we

40

I am alive ls how many can do down the suckers that, we can add to our bank balances, but where has it got Us?"

"Nay Sam," I say a bit in- dignunt Hke, "I get you the best plot you can find in the

I do not Colonial Cemetery. buy you a grave stone for I know, you would object to the But ha waste of money." gives a groan. "Look at where

+

I tell him to leave it on the bed and sling his hook, but the fanio thing happens and I am cartled down the Peak and banged in my office just as I am refusing to subscribe to the poor children's fund.

I wake up screaming again, but I am just in bod.

1 go to sleep again, but this time I take no notice when the ghost arrives and just let him blather. But what he బి scares me. He says that if I do not sholl out a bit for the poor and stand u fow rounds of drinks at the Club,

Well...

So, (says Bob) I have decided to reform, and be of one of goad cheer with my fellow men, For the ghost said, if I did not, I should die very soon ali alone and unmourned.

On the other hand (sald Bob) the ghost said that if I reformed, I should live to be loved and respected by everyone in Hong- kong, and doubtless finish up with a Flatue to me, and one or two O.B.ES. to keep me going. "Well Bob," 1 sold, "I

that 'you indeed glad to hear intend to hand round a tow

+

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