This Funny World
JOE'S AUTO WRECKS! TOWING-REPAIRS-PARTA
"I hope they don't build something that will spoil
the natural beauty of the countryside"
BY
THE •
WAY
by Beachcomber
GHG
ADVICE to girls to be careful said Foulenough, sighing like a
about laughing, as it pro- duces wrinkles, recalled to me the poet Southey's objeglion to laughter.
It broadens the face, soid he.
furnace, "is a question only you can answer. Will you be mine?” "No." said Vito. "Then let me
be yours,” replied the warrior.
and a broad face is vulgar. He Important announcement
added that laughter ks " plebeian emotion" and recom-
mmended that "oothing beyond a silent and
transitory simper
should ever be Indulged by refined ranks." That makes me roar and howl with laughter.
In Rocky's Bar
NOONER or later one meels everyone in Rocky's Bar of
does not one?
Any egg bear-
THE CHINA MAIL, FRIDAY, AUGUST 30, 1957.
JACOBY
ON BRIDGE
Good Lead Is Better Defence
By OSWALD JACOBY
JODAY'S hand was played at
Ton
York.
the Regency Club in New
Walter Malowun whic sot South was rather disappointed that he failed to make his Ave- diamond contract and sent me the hand as an example of fine defence.
West opened the fight of spades.. East won with the queen. Malowon dropped the reven. Fast cashed the ace and Malowan
ten, dropped the Nevertheless East kept right on with A third spade and his | partner rufed to set the hand.
It was good defence since Malowan had carefully
con-
NORTH
9
• K 3G Q32
#A83
45653
WEST ABL
K 10976b
042 104
EAST 4AQ943 MAJBA
5 397 SOUTH (D)
1072
❤ None ◆KQJ 1997
AKQ2
No one vulnerable South West North Exni
Pass INT. Double Раза 3 N.T. Pran
3+ "Ta32 5+
164.9.191 42/44
ing the inscrip- tion shown here.
4 Pass Opening tead-8
Double Pass Pass Pass
Is certifed as
no
of spades. real
H. 27 474
having been laid, reate the deuce examined, tested, However, Eest had categorised, problem. He and his partner graded, schedul always opened low from a ed, sorted classi three-card sult. Hence he knew Red, weighed, West started with only two measured. X-spades and the third lead was a
packed, elnel. rayed. unpacked, packed, dry-cleaned. certifed, most interesting. East had a bul koncsi Inko-out Malownn's three- 278 04/20/1
bu, 1/6/26, diamond hid was both strength 6381/1/24/er, O.L, 610, gb/ch/2, | ard
pre-empt. It shut out internation: Ananeler, "How and R/34/6081 (d).
West temporarily.
Cannes,
Foulenough ran into his
love,
Via
Brevis.
ald Fancy
abe
The bidding of the hond is
me here." he said. registered, marked, and stamped poor
in compliance with regulations double.
mceling "Where are you staying?" asked. He gave the nunk
on enormous via owned by un
on carth did you mannge
that?" said Vitä. "Is son Tail-piece happened to fall into the water
on a dark night. I happened to be there, and rescued him." "Are you never going to reltic down?"
asked. That,"
HE
she
CROSSWORD
12
and
North's three no-trump bld was reasonable and he would bave wrapped up his contract against the probable spade lead. West's four-heart bid was in- tended as a sacrifice and North Neverthe- had a good double. less, there is no defence against four hearts the way the cards
all the delights offered to the ladies for the noluma I like best the hut that will br fatal to any hair-style, will bes; be worn over a shaven head" Bold girls will presum-tle. ably wear rings, in their notes.
TARGET
R
1
P
PET
14
15 16
10
19
2.
Across
247
1. It may be infantile. but thad
dos Bot mean it's not serious 101
V. Trin is the trick. (4)
10. First Dana Daily Capron initia
ally. (4)
11 Rested with most of the dumi
star Gregory. 197
12 Patigues, (4)
15. Just the gear for moto,ing? (UN
18. Twice this is quite a dance. (3)
1 Head of rejection.
(B)
20. i thyrass with cypress and id
makes trees p. 181
23. i wet in otherwinɛ. It a giri, toy
24. Acta, 141
28. Covers follow they're in)
the protection businese, 41
28. They turn into pert [5)
Dow
1. Put rigtite 197
a. It covers the ground. (4)
Blight variety may wese of witły 13, (9)
4. For thrka tongues and Roms
Chickens (0)
B. Reel back at the sight of this
9. Det down to it.
(41
7. door one had made many ■
milonaire. (43)
d. Resele plus
10.
Top in deal.
(enny, (8)
14. Father is more inn naif 11), (4)
15 Pyres make the city. 161
10. Played
anpokr
mayne. (4)
17. Belong to ATD
the cifique ?
10).
21, Dear with,
it, the place
is a bit like a
100. (9)
22. A bribo
maybe. Tor
gerbera n.
131
CHESS
By LEONARD BARDEN
IN T
TAO
how many
For letters or more ent you make from the lettera in the
Inst une player i thin
minking Pack word. sho Fetteri each of the wu are inay be used once unly Each word must contain the Inge jetter in the centre Nquare, and
E be at
Corel T lint. No plano word "TABUET: 21 words, b nombroper names.
DOO 24 wurde, bary good; sí words, excellent. Holation tumorrow.
YESTERDAY'S (OLUTION 1. Alar sturen. alary after site amatöl amatory smeral am seria army rely atoch alemy Tania team leamy malar male
mari mats mayar merent MEGANETT
endat malar mersi marut meriji maya Maty, aral, ramal ente) Zram Coin DYE Poyalty telesa team” tray.
Majowan's Ave-diamond bid was a dual purpose, He had some slight fear that four hearts considerable would make and hope that he could bring home
five diamonds,
If East had tried to cash just one heart trick Walter would have succeeded in that fell pur- As It was he scored E proft from his hundred
pose. small
honours.
CARD Sense
Q-The bidding has keen: North East South West 2.
?
2
You, South, hold:
*K2 ♥KII 4365 40 10 8 7 4
What do you do?
You
A-Bid three no-trump. have 10 points and two heart stoppers.
TODAY'S QUESTION
Your partner rebids to four clubs. What do you do?
Answer Tomorrow
WOMANSENSE
COMFORTS
IN THE
BATHROOM.
By VERONICA PAPWORTH
TF there is one room in
Imost English homes that
is far from "homey" it is the bathroom. At best it is collection of chill tiling and sanitary fittings.
At worst-oh, well, you all know the kind of cold com- fort I have in mind.
I've been pecking into other people's bathrooms, looking for bright ideas for your consideration.
Plushy or pretty, quiet pince part or a "nerve centre" with dictaphone, telephone and a whisky and sodu to hand, Well, what do you want?
One thing and apart from a bath it is the only thing that these three rooms have in com- men-a itted corp:t is a MUST.
A
serene bathroom for
Charles Parmeil.
The atted carpet is a lighter shade of tobacco brown ond there is a thick, creamy fur rug.
The bathroom in Hardy The one splash of colour IR Amies's town house looks just the button-back chuir up- the way I imagine an Edwardton holstered in chartreuse yellow smoke-room looked.
silk,
Apart from the bath, of course! The walls are covered with a French wallpaper tobacco coloured with a creamy pattern of criss-cross bands and flowers,
The paper covers the doors of the Alted cupboard-also the door to the maestro's bedroom. Even the bath is papered cut- side and glazed over,
Note the wallpaper border, There's a horizontal and a ver cal version so that the swags and lassels hung the correct way.
Comforts include a glass-lined shower, a huge triple mirror, a weighing machine and a radio,
asked about the effects of steam on the wallpaper.
"See for yourself," said Hardy
It's been up four years." I looked perfeet.
Larry
Adler has a Victorian bathroom with great splashes of colour all over the place,
The walls are Wedgwood blue.... Atted carpet a deep rich red....furniture mahogany.
Hardy Amies's bathroom looks like a mokeroom. The wall- paper is tobacco coloured.
There are cabinets full of curios, photographs of friends and relations, ornate silver mirrors and boxes, flower ple- lures and framed prints round the walls.
I can't possibly do justice to it In one drawing.
"My wife Elleen planned the whole thing," he told me, "with, the help of Herman Schrävjør
My only contribution was the telephone, Gay, isn't ***
It certainly is.
John Siddeley has designed a deliciously pretty and utterly serene bathroom for Mrs Charles Parnell who was Shelugh Wilson,
All the paintwork is white. the filled carpet is willow green and the rugs are tuffed while candlewick,
The wallpaper-a rlot of full blown pink roses and jade leaves --covers
walls and the ceiling.
There's no telephone, no radio, no pictures or ornaments--apārt from Two Victorian chemists jara in just the right shade of rose-pink.
eyeing the paper.
"French, of course," said 1
"Of
"and Jahn very cleverly had it course," said Shelagh--
treated with silicones or some- thing--50 Ihal It's steam tesistant,"
D
UNDERCOVER TELEVISION
Page 5:
Put your money
on a beret
To paraphrase an old slogan-" if you want to get ahead gri
o BERET,"
Big, baggy, back-draped berets are going to hit the headlines "for autumn and winter. In fact, I report their first appearance În one Landon shop-selling siku tun, too I've sketched, a botch for your consideration.
*
The large above is in valyet, and so lɩ the one on the sight. The athes is jersey.
O you want to hide your KEEP IN TRIM....
Television set?
It may be you don't like to admit bought it
owning TV.we for the chlidren really"...one mitust Titouc
with - the tintes"... GIP's........ 30. nice for when Grannie edmes to stay."
Or may be that, like Mrs. Laurle Newton Sharpe you don't like the shape of it- "a hideous with one's beautiful furniture."
Mrs Newton Sharpe-belong a clever as well as an elegant woman-has found an excellent camouflage.
She has had a circle of six- ply wood cut very slightly larger then her set and fixed on the top.
Londen Express Service
By IDA JEAN KAIN
Reduce To Take Strain
A
Off
Weak Back
S life, becomes physically less inclined to take physical easier, two common ail- exercise and more prone to ments that beset us are overweight,
Over the whole thing goes, overweight and backache, The solution is to stop circular velvet cloth with a One condition can aggravate overeating and start correc- heavy fringed border,.
the other. It's no favour to tive exercise to strengthen A Jump stands in the centre, a weak back to be burdened the muscles of the back. If "When we want to view," she with excess fat on the waist your back is not normally
and abdomen. Morcover, strong you
should avoid tells me "we just fold back the with an aching back one is strenuous cloth."
or jerky calis- thenics and all movements which involve twisting. The following exercises recommended by orthopaedic specialists for strengthening back muscles.
BOYS' AND GIRLS' MAGAZINE
Big Ben Mountain
—He Was A Lonely Man Because He Was So Big-
And he
By STELLA
By MAX TRELL
"ONCE
time,"
sald Mississippi River
"HIS olher friends." General
Tin,
standing and had yawned and stretched himself and had lain himself down to sleep right there on the ground. slept and slept and slept-"
sald
the
and
the
"How long did he sleep?" asked Knart,
FRIDAY, AUGUST 30
YOUR BIRTHDAY
BORN today, you apparently have a jolly, happy-go-lucky nature. But underneath-and very close to the surface—JA merious streak which takes a practical, close view of life, in fact, a competitor must get up very early in the morning to go ahead ut you! yum willing to take a long charice and, by so doing, ofben outw!! yotir opponent by striking while the Iron shot. This being "siest with the mostest" is what will win you an early succes in life. Whether or not you hold on to it will depend to a large degree upon how much you want to continue working hard
"For a hundred years," sai General Tin. "Then he opened
NCE upon a
General Thi the Tin Allantie Occan. But it waEN'I Soldier to Kuart and Hand, any tise. They both stayed the shadows, “in a faraway way down near his feet and he his eyes for a minute and shut the letter. Your head for business place, there lived a great, big could never get to being close them again for a thousand
and friendly with them. "Come
years. Then he
his opened up here he called to them.
eyes again and shut them once Then he pleked them up in a more.
And this time he slept big handful but they ran right for a million years." clown again.”
appears to stand you in good stend ventures. In most money-making and the chances are that you will accumulate considerable wealth during your tifetime.
of the
Inan,"
"How Big?" asked Knarf.
than "Bigger
sald big," Attaclive. to members
General En, "taller than tall, opposite sex, you are fund of their | greater than great. He was pociety. You will have a host of
the biggest and tallest and admirers and your home is likely to
Greatest man that ever lived." be the centre of the ancial netivliy In your community. Layal and true
"What was his name?" asked in your friendships you make steadfast marriage partner.
Hanid.
date
Among those born on this were: George F. Root, song con
Fred MacMurray, Actor: You love excitement, activity and Hazen 9, Pingree, Michigan Gover enjoy having something going on all nor: Julian A. Weir, arist: John
William The Abne, ti fact, if things are get-
educator: and Samuel ting duli in your violnity, you mre Osgood, author.
To find what the stars have in just the one to atir them up. You Day appear to be rushing là where store for you tornzurow, select your angels fear to tread, but actually birthday slar and read the corre- Joi have macke
CATC very
sponding paragraph. Det
your
tul plans and, are following them to birthday star be your daily guide.
SATURDAY, AUGUST 31
21)-
VINCO (AUE. 24-Sept. Take an optimistic attitude and be tactful in approaching any situation. Best this evening,
LIBRA [Bept. 24-Oct. 23) Hold fast to what you have and I don't gamble the present on some future ponibility. Plan a quiet, social day.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)- If you have learned through ex- perience, then all goes well. "Bul" if you refuse to learn, take it easy!
SAGITTARIUS (Nav. D-Dạc, 22)— For the time being, make the most of the present circumstances, Relax tendons and don't push against the obstacles
PISCES" (Feb.
20-Mar. 20)→→→ A routine day. Plan to get the maximum of cent and relaxation. Don't overdo things on your week- end planning.
20
ARIEB (Mar. 21-Apr. Things can become involved unless you organies everything with the greatest of core. Palierce pay off.
21-May
21)- TAURUS (Apr. Avold ageing any new contrpel ins until next volving money details werk. Consider it now-but wait. GEMINI (May 23-311010 A If you have conducted your affairs widely for the past few days all will be well. Otherwim, watch cult
Knarf and Hanid gasped. Knart and Hanid both shook their heads and said what a "Yes, that's how long it was," shame that was that the Missis sald General Tin. "Big Ben sippi River and the Atlantic Mountain slept That long Ocean should run away from because didn't see the sense Big Ben Mountain.
of staying awake since he had
Big Ben Slopt
are
Position: Lie on back,. with left knee bent, and right leg straight down, arms down at sides.
Movement: Pull up snugly with abdominal muscles and press small of back flat against the floor. Now raise right leg a few inches off floor, and hold the muscle contraction to o slov count' of six. Slowly lower leg to floor. Repent this 4 to 6 times. Relax. Then again press small of back rgainst floor, bend right knee, raise left leg and hold. Throughout the excrcise maintain the up-and- pull on the abdominal muscles.
in
"He was bigger than big."
said General Tin.
"His name." sald General Tin, "was
Mountain. Big Ben
no friends to talk to except the thousand and a hundred years, His father was a hill and his
stare who couldn't answer him he looked around and smiled." mother was a hill. But he was
ofte the Mississippi River and "Why?" asked Knurt and bigger than both of them pul "Then one day," sald General the Atlantic Ocean who ran Hanld, wondering, together. When he stood up, Tin, "the whole earth shook. away from him as feat ce they the clouds gathered around his And that was because Big Ben could go. But when he finally "Big Ben Mountain found that
got tired
of woke up, after a million and a
was the moon.
chin like a bib. Ils right eye Mountain had was the sun and his left eye And he only kept one of them open at a time because with coch eye ho could are half the world."
"bel he felt wonderful being so big" said Knarf General Tin,
to
He Was A Lonely Man General Tin shook his head "Blg Ben Mountain waÍR. When he very lonely man. stood up, there was no one to talk to except the stars and they were all millions and millions of miles away. And he got tired of waiting for them to enswer him, when he spoke to them. And bo ̈wax kongly else was betruse
everybody nailed way down at his feet,”.....
"What were him.
ather £{z}?" Hanid
CAPRICORN (Dec. 23-JAT, | 20).... CANCIN (Jum 21-July 21) The month an end on a slightly. Gused against a mudders health upmes, rour note for you’unless you have Hali to regular routine and eti De should go, well (with 'you, i ezgirsleed all your duties carehilly,
optimistic. AQUARIUS (Jan. 21-746. 19)— LEO (July 24-Ang. 群人 From actual play: White to one of those days when it is wiser. Not the eight day to jeopardise your. to soups the status quo oslinky Cuture welfare by oncolom, oc lượ1⁄2- rather than to prear set malown pulsive Motion, Avoid insity prob- potentiality,
fee Potpens setioci,
move and win..
London Azpruza · Kurokoa
know.
wanded
to
Rupert and the Fiddle-8
Rupert begins to get worried im't a buzzing sound. I just don't. about the mysterious noise, “ LE know how to describe it.". His only I knew which direction it pair watch him as he moves away was coming from 1 could go lowly and uncertainly. **1 will towards it," he mutters." 124 find what it is" thinks Rupert so tiny that I can't tell if it's meae hin curiosity now, thoroughly ot far away,*. [Erle la mene je "actuandy, “and I'll prove that Fra might be thom borst but day it not making it up,
SAL, NIGMES, KESERVED
"Because," said General Tin,
by lying down and sleeping and not moving, he had made him self a lot of friends. Grass had grown up his side. Trets grew on his shoulders, Snow was in his hair. The Eaglo perched
Position, Lie
hands
on
of
on back on floor, bail: knees bent, soles of feet flat on floor.
Movement Place palms
thighs. Lift head and shoulders of the floor, loward slowly sliding pulme knees, Hold for a slow count of six, nol holding breath. to starting Slowly return position. Repeat 3 to 6 times.
Position: Le face down, head pillowed on folded arms.
Movement: Contract muisdies
slow
Repent a halt.
same position of
on his nose and, best of all, the of the buttocks, pulling in to Wind blew up to him and Ward median line, and hold whispered in his car and gave this contraction for a him all the news and gossip of count of six. all that was happening in all dozen Umes. the world below and around lying thee down, clay honda
From the him."
behind back, with elbowa The exercise is to raise head and shoulders of floor and hold to count of six, This exercise strengthens upper back muscita:
**And
then
was he happy from straight. on?" Knart and Honid
I wanted to know.
Bald
"Oh
yes," yes, où General Tin. "But he never stood up again. He kept lyinz down, half awake, half sleeping,
Make sure that your mattress gives firm, support and does not allow your spine.to sink into a not daring to move for fear that hollow. Correct
your lting h away....un away as fast as middle of your spine. Sit with new friends would run posture....never Bit in the
they could rathia two Atends | back of hips against back at did, the Mississippi River and chair scat and pull up snugly the Atlantic Ocean.”
with abdominal muscles.
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