1956-08-01 — Page 4

Page

THE CHINA MAIL, WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 1, 1956."

NATHANIEL CUBBINS

Yo

It

holidays.

settled eager for their dinner and is too

full of deur old pal tume.

whose All

tuma the sture, incasurt~

staying powers at the bar are limita are on made happy at they can revež the table whore le real English food (and plenty of it) alist unknown to foreign tourists.

of his OU have probably read any disturbance

pence euch evening. lot in the news.

Your Uncle's vital papers about people's ments"

are 43-43-43 There toru a tape measure would be For

Lime the first

see what you

caywhere to may read about the holiday happened to the middle mensure

ment under the new regline.

was spent at Brighton

the first day be had

of fruit juice, pas breakfast

and and quantities of buffered Foust and

For lunch he had marmalade four courses, in one five, in- cluding thek

!

of a stomach, the tortured The early part of Tum's holt- tum belonging to your Uncle Nat.

day

On

النقاء

As the must benetkin. Hobdays ridge, bacon have been describerl H

omething different" 11PW paren hart be silausted! fit

He would not be allowed! know any lung about what 29

AND

E

in the world weasu the news which is usually bad, annelimes pula 193 break fund

☆

11

Work would not be ruta omad became the thought of 19

༄* 「*;

V bans matures and petits brin ΤΗΣ

Jurch As Faix would be done Burry womli be 711 deagues at the few-hed arick in the evening to part ham soff by

supper

Thre

LES

Lett

# 11

either would be sent doan ever, etay Theme

th w Sandis

stered a A by P for the

1 l axONG Ing

such a bread, agit, pofuatoes,

Vital measurements

THE

Inhaber

of dark

down woull be cutar and two bee lunch, the bfore dinner

1

Before putting him to bed the Supe measure showed that the Vital measurements w re 43-44- 43

An English Tea

It is a cooked by the gaur. dener's wife, and, a salmon and new potators, steak and kidney puds and pics, roast beef and Yorkshire, and fruit taris were

Tum sent down, your uncle's could only mumble "lucky gar- deat as he tried to deal with

Tuap of Staton cheese The

was out tape measure nggula that night. Vital measure - The next thens were 43-45-43. tight they were 43-48-43

✰

☆

It was on the third night that was made a restuctant decision

E next day the onslaught of the Tum Bane again in the

mariahner was inereused by

an Englet ton of cakes, Tra MRS. Buttercel but Cucumber sandwiches.

bad

A Tum hos not been or the rere vitig end of an English ta by many years be registered Bas

und discomfost

an

it der

ly way knows, be the m

f disgust

pics. reading “Plo Lady" in a PORTION of the louinigy

Pag

The ukle measurement bas set up to 47, and the only palt teuss at hand, unsupported

abul to foll braces, were

Robertson Like

Hare's kAWI, lacos, tre a farce, because the three top buttons wouldn't meet, Tum's Waterloo

He was me at Waterloo. unmediately, pit on the strictest thet of his hiv.

That evening in the bar Tum NEXT day us the Sex Nest Tum

met many dear old pad tumes Laud expectand this radio of cocktraks Bin

they leav AVUILDet No breakiusi exopt a cup of des through the massive Eng- imeacetened ten aus zout doiwers

he was

he uble to maite Although

Krowing lab tes

stoner

Vand turvasurements fernee en at 11pm

เคร 43-40-43

actres

BAT

A:

A. Tum, unike The thing of

Ter 3><

Rude Kruglya

1 Bulky been able to digest d nk.

|

my cal wirds, be wmadh be

1

. Ita - from

POCKET CARTOON

by OSBERT LANCASTER

"Personally I

ogree wit

wyr til dunger of attaching

Macmillan det ser

an exaxgerated importuner

to this whole prestion of

redundancy.**

Look!

Hidden Time!

Golden Dreams

by Rolex.

Never before such fabulous fashion to

Wan

W

2011 a arber Bye - Course Fundusay at mid-day, all he got

was a poached egit on ptrach

bach ebrwe", Miper he salad, and Melba Rist

Tu espart And Rrumblings which kept us Unele sake, là got the same treat- ment the next day And the next By this time he was not only fit but becoming concay", whors THE

bearing ail

✰ After, ton days of bar, taemi- tuent Tum was gelang kage But pour Uncle was hardly able to the his slaves He thought 11. Maryd much bager he would have to zay gundbye to

4ket. lady disappearing the bad news again.

ide heard about the BMA en- t 1 wort. wus al

ference at Bughters and how voe boss Trousers, which could ter

Mukh that madkite – net be bullow at the top.

TU VA

So with vitud masurement

11 43-47-43 Tum was driven 1. me pa a strict diet agam. The wl had to be moved. bark fjole he etnuld be æædged into it

Tum's paradise

S Tum can be and fall as

bds

WIS

}

should be X-raged twice a year Lo see if anything uwful was going on inside them.

11e aly heard the significant remarks of another doctor, who

"There

there seem to be so many disease, drinking kang. and other Joms of self-indulgenc?, that al- most every kind of pleasure can give

rise to it.

aleshed.

dly as the temperature When Tum thought of itis

fleshpats

of an English summer he wat holiday indulgences next the

back to cornel on a two-

Sussex be turned 1 non-fattening foods. day diet

over

incepted his twice, but But since it was ha holiday hugel supper a tiverat a murmur. glad he was growling ang ala lu fpet, he wan y quiet in Tho

jate ja stail agon be

night that he art have cried Blackboy' tuiselt ku skvep

Latest

Ful measurements: 43-39-43

(World Copyright)

[

1 te Super

14th-eratu, y

tums' paradise except that the bar is

pub in Sty

This happy place

circle pretty wrists. Here are new watches

by Rolex, with hand-wrought or jewelled lids covering their time-telling faces, Even the bands of these watches are of gold kidskin or pure gold. A flick

of the finger and you have the most precias timepieces possible in such tiny watches--the proud #chievement of Swiss craftsmen, Rolex have designed these Golden Dreams for the woman who wants her watch to be absolutely accurate, and yet look like an important

fashion accessory. Come and sen the whole series of these beautiful bracelet-watches.

ROLEX

GENEVA

ttrnctive for tun wher

CONTINUING THE LETTERS OF

Nikki the Bear

dear comrade mum,

EXPECT you have been wondering what I've been up to since I last wrote during

England. Well, you remember 1 told you how they treated me like a Lord or a high-up member of the Kremlin when 1 Brat arrived, and red me on caviar and honey? And wok me to Windsor to see the Queen?

I had my picture in all the papers and told you how I would arrange for you. Bruinvitch. Rupertvitch, und alater Olgavitch to be transported from home in Siberia to Regent's Park because everything was a nice

1

put

Then wrote later and told you to stay

different after things ปร

got very Bulganin and Krush left and people over here didn't have to be nice to bears any norr. especially Russian bears

My advice. Comrade Mum, is to forget about caviar and sweet roots, and stay right where you are and live on sweet nothing These bourgeois, decadent, capitalist Western Powers are a pretty flckle toi,

They haven't given me a mention in the Press for werks Just because 1 haven't bitten anybody or got stinko like Krushchev and let fly a few home truths.

THE

★

★

WE capitalist Deusts are more interested !fo beauty these days thm beasta. The papers are covered with pictures of King-of-the- famous beauties like Jack Underworld! Spot. Benrface King-of-the Underworld) Russo, Billy (King-of-the- Underworld) Hill. Marilyn "Dors, and Diana Monroe.

This must make another beauty hopping mad who only got her expenses sheet on the front pair this week instead of her

picture. Her name is Lady Docker, usually called Norah. She owna a large husband called Sir Bernard.

I imagine Norah is giving Bernie the old What-o for allowing Marilyn and Diana ptbilcity to overshadow their publicity, because I imagine Norah is the kind of Lady who can't bear publicity, especially if It does not mention Norah. I only imagine

this.

EVERYTHING 13 in the

same

here as it la back home in the East. Comrade Mum.

In England they blame all their strikes on the Communists, Just like the Com- munists back home say all their strikes are imported by capitalists.

Locked in my concentration cell here in Regent's Park very little news leaks through, except, of course, about Marilyn and Diana and a few distorted rumours about things not going too well in the Kremlin.

The things they

nere Invent over about us Russians! I'd never be surprised to see them cook up a story one day saying that even Uncle Joe ain't what he used to be Well, I must close now. your loving son....

nikki.

P.S. Tell brothers Bruinvitab *nd Rupertritch that 11 over this Marilyn comes to Siberia to keep their paws off her porridge - as she is sure my Golái. locks

P.P.8. I bet Norab is wild because they published her expenses sheet and not her old party pał Billy (King - of - the-Underworld)

HIBI's.

By

CHAPMAN PINCHER

THAT

SHORT,

SHARP, PAINFUL WORD

NOUT, the excruciating that heredity is involved,

bas

In

baffled the doctors for there is a history of gout among

parents or grandparents.

with Experiments

1 pain- centuries, is posing them a

messining device have shown new problem.

agonising complaints men

It rates six unila pain-scale compared

on with

They cannot explain why thai gout ranks among the most gout has declined so much suffer, since the war that the pep- the pery old colonel with a huge seven to nine for heart attacka

10 and

the for childbirth, bandage on his foot has

a human sharpest pain

being even disappeared from the endures. comic cartoons.

A doctor has described the In the big toe, of goul

were satisfied pain

Some doctors that the goul decline was due where it usually strikes, thus: to the rapid rise in the price "If the pain of rheumatism of drink, Over-indulgence in is like putling your foot in

....or Brains?

alcohol was thought to be a

vice and turning the handle prime cause of the complaint. until you can bear it no longer,

shown then the Now an inquiry has

pain of gout corre

the handlo that the average alcohol intake sponds to giving

gout is litle another couple of turns." of people with different from those who escape it, About one gout sulierer in of those quizzed every three claimed to be a total abstainer or only an occasional drinker. Also, while women are drink- ing more than before the war, gout remains essentially a mas- culine disease, Times commSWNET thun women.

It is stul 20 men unong

there

19

13

TORTUNATELY

simple treatment which

effective-pille usually rapidly containing the drug colchicum, extracted from the plant called mradiow-saffron.

Doctors have known that for this treatment is speelfie geul for more than 1,500 years, Is it Meat?

but to add to the greni gout mystery they still have no idea HE rise in the cost of meat

toly. Tondered to be a fur-

Professor J.B.S. Hulduna of the ther likely explatution

has seriously suggested that the

of decline of gout.

high uric acid content Rich cuis

game, blood of human beings is liver, kidney, and sweetbreads sponsible for brain develop- called ment. contain ingredients

of meal,

purines, which were believed to start attacks,

Purines give rise to uric acid, crystals

that

and it is known

urle acld derived from found round gouty joints.

arc

But experiments with radio- Delive chemicals have revealed low in that people on a diet

high urines may build up a level of uric netd in the boay. The only certainly left about the cause of gout seems

tho

re-

So when the Brst agonising twb ge of an alluck strikes the sufferer, he can console himself that maybe he is being singled ool because

In- telligent than most,

he la

more

* AMONG recent gout sufferers

attainment of above-average Sir Alfred Munnings, the Aga Bernard Baruch, Sir Khan, to be Thomas Beecham,

LONG-DIVISION INTELLIGENCE

From JAMES COOPER

New York. Central Intelligence Agency. Ever since the agency was

(IMPLE long-division sum

S today reveals of established after the Second

one

Washington's closest secrets -the number of people om- ployed in the hush-hush

ARE WE MAKING IDOLS

OF THE WRONG MEN?

T

is

the on

in the Treble Chance.

bowling batsmen

London. THIS IS MY ACCUSATION: THAT BRITONS tention HE scene-a ban- ARE MORE INTERESTED IN SPORT THAN averages instead, or un cur luck

queting hall in IN THE FIGHT FOR SURVIVAL Washington. The

leaders of the

Senate are there. So

are

ambassadors, resplen- dent in braid.

The

By ROBERT PITMAN

who Britain's

is worried attitude

Was

friend we have. He helps us anyone tables

are heavy to safeguard our oil sup- about with plate. And in the plies not only in Iraq but in to her responsibilities in the

also over centre sits the guest of the whole Middle East. If world it honour. Queen Elizabeth of Feisal fell, our factories in whelmingly disturbing. Enginnd, quietly fingering Britain might soon And

Could it happen any- her notes for the key speech themselves whispering into

where else? Or could it of the visit.

Suddenly the

happen if some other news, Yet how was Feisal wel apart from the Test victory, is interrupted. A toast-

the by London's Lord had been brought to master step forward. To comed

Lord Mayor? bursts of applause from the Mayor at Guildhall? senators he announces the latest baseball scores.

silence.

ceremony

THE SCORE

con

now hope

to

World War, the Government has refused to divulge how many work for it.

Senators tried to find out when Secretary of State Dulles asked for $40,000,000 for new building for the agency. In vain.

@

But he did admit that the average space required for each worker was 08.5 square feet,

Amateur spics checked on the nation's professional coun- ter-spies. They found tho building will have 1,135,000 square feet.

Divide that by the space for each worker and the top-secret anewer 18-11.623 workČrs,

MERICA s to spend A

$10,000,000 copying Britain's on the road" scare

tactics in the hope of reducing 42,000 traffle deaths ex-

possess.

But forget mere questions of "death At the height of Britain's honour. Everything we look for-

whon greatness,

Gordon was ward to now depends on off-the killed at Khartoum, the anger, clency-efficiency at the factory ed people of London stoned the bench, efficiency in the execu- Council: "It will be a blood windows of 10, Downing Strezi.

and

tive suite.

preted this year.

Says

the National Safety

guts campaign, with talk about funerals and widowe, to Now our men every day pre

Yet, in the last year, how many try to top this murder on the murdered in Cyprus: every day our Colonies are being torn from workers in an average

factory highway," We us. And how do we react?

could

that SLY

they

have shrug, wo yawn, and we turn to studied the problem of increasing the race results in the stop press their own efficiency half as hard as they have studied the corn- plex problems of racing form?

And how many executives can honestly

say that they set a better Example?

column.

A

OBSESSIONS

T the height of Britain's

It wor- obsessions, of course. shipped men like Livingstone. It treated Florence Nightingale as a latter-day saint.

With civic pomp, with old

What if he had been told world glitter, and with & something really moment remarkable display of un- ous? What if he had been intentioned bad manners. told that Canada had

Yet who have taken the place For in the middle of the seceded from the Empire? of these great names today? For IT has never happened, of all-important

cere The banquet, we may guess, Livingstone read Laker.

Nightingalo course. Yet, if it did, what mony the toastmaster was would have proceeded un- Florence Smythe.

state

a furore it would produce, instructed to boom out this disturbed. what ammunition for pro- pronouncement: "The scorê fessional anti-Americans in is 140 for eight." every continent.

Can nation so unbalanced, s0 obsessed irresponsible, so.

fit to lead the world?

us look at something which

really happened in London

the other day,

And later, when the Lord announced Mayor himself

DISTURBING

OUR SHARE

DAYS OFF

as

BYCHOANALYST. · Anna Freud, of Hampstead, and Mrs Pandit, the High Commis sloner for India in London, "Women of are named Achievement" in a list of 17 to be honoured at an international conference of Soroptimist Clube in New York.

Others include Miss Margaret- Aitken, the Canadian M.P., Mrs Elcanor Roosevelt, and Mre "Babo" Zaharias, the golfer who after a third, operation for cancer says: "I'm' not ' licked

DURING the Wimbledon on yet."

busincas some big London'

men, to my knowledge, hund seats BANDONED: Plan to ap For booked in the grandstand, not point five women to hand Pat for the odd afternoon, but for a out summonses for parking

a time.. whole week.at

offences in Yonkers, New York.

woman Only one

applied for "Any foreign buyer in a hurry | the $2,800 a year job-and sho would have been forced to discuss was not qualified. contracts while Rosewall and Hood leaped and slashed. ́*

What 2 comment

on

our

modern senso of values. what a problem when it comes to honoring the truly great.

And

mire the life-long skill of a

BOOM-Farmland in Florida

bought for $8 an acro 10 So what is the solution? Do I years ago was sold this

week By all means we should ad- that the Test had been won YET have we any right to blame

want a campaign against sport? for $1,000 an acre to builders with a trivial sport--they by an innings, the cheers the Lord Mayor nione for Gordon Richards or the stolid Far from it. I want to enjoy who expect to get $4,000 on acro would be whispering -- be

when they build houses thère, outroared any

applause assuming that sport outweighs

Yet how can we now adequately rest of u? It has never happened which the royal guest of all other Issues? What about the leadership of a Leonard Hutton, sport myself.

honour'n dedicated surgeon or a I want to see Compton sweepTTOLIDAYMAKERS at North Falmouth, Cape Cod, aro in Washington. But now let honour got.

We may not have any ahore in sclerilat who has changed an out a century in the next-Test, 1

want to see England, trounce the offered ridge in an Italian two- the welcome given to guests cf epoch? state. But we all have a share

world at football, I want to see man submarine of the typo in something bigger-in an Em- Take the case of Sir Alexan- Fire pulling his way to a gold used to attack British

which our pire for

fathers der Fleming, who gave penicillin medal in Australia B

in the Second) world; kunipe In London wo welcomed

Tought, which onco gave promise to mankind. Throughout the King Feisal of Iraq. And

course, it was all of unparalleled prosperity for world, even among our worst But I also want to see a time NINETY U.B. farmers with Folaal, let it be noted, is no wonderfully droll, It was our children:

enemies, there are people who when we regain our sporting their own planes plan a Blows the very name of Flaming, sota land when we re-, goodwill flying four of Europain ordinary guest.

delightfully whimsical. Today that Empire is wither. Yet how did we honour that member that Drake went on to Congress, will spend $300,000 In one vital respect, ho, is, could have come from an ing away before our eyes, yet wo name? By adding to it a to do something more than finish to take them across the Atlante the most important single Ealing Studio film. But for do not choose to look Cur at which even jockeys and opening his game of bowls, an