POCKET CARTOON
by 09BERT LANCASTER
"Darling, you must mert my Uncle Bertie he's a genuine Teddy boy!!"
THE CHINA' MAIL, SATURDAY, AUGUST 14, 1954.
CARNIVAL-THE
OF LIFE
O you, I do, love
D'fairgrounds? Do you
TIME
I LOVE
NANCY SPAIN
on the new books
learn some hard facts about carnival life ...
Gresham
PARADE
A COLUMN OF THE UNUSUAL ABOUT
PEOPLE AND PLACES AND "THINGS
the
IS HE Just who is Tho.
nsked But they should be
In the Inaugurul Mass the
attended RICHEST world's richest man? questions such as: "How's your congregation
'multably drossed in sense and unfoolhardy courage.
The Intriguing ques- mother-in-law (or boy friend) chapel MY DEAR MRS JONES MAN?
tion is again being behaving?"; or "have you still flippers and goggica.
forewoman a got the same (Rodale Press, 68.) consists of raised by stories that he is
NOT the letters that this wonderful publicity-shy Texan,, 64-year- foreman) at work?" old boy wrote to Mrs Jones of old Haroldson Lafayette Hunt.
his Pantglos from 1851-2.
Captain Newell, another Inldget, who married Lavinia's
Mrs Jones was 00 sister Minnie (2ft. lin.), was so
that younger than he was, Minnie died upset when
beauty. ha he left show business altogether, famous
settled in England, married & hostess, and a wit. full-sized woman, had two full- she sized children, and died at the Age of 00, well loved and well respected.".
hang them in the summer wondering how to read palms, what it feels like to ride the wall of death, and exactly what profits
William there are in that glittering game of chance with the been mad about fairs ever since a kind freak who could wheel of flickering lights?
only use his arms noticed Yes? Then William L. that Gresham's feet hurt, Gresham's MONSTER MID- "That half-man acrobat WAY (Gollancz, 13/6) is could look straight into the the book for you. Take it to heart of his fellow men,
people who work in carnivals are much kinder and more
{the fairground with you and anys Gresham, who
A British Crossword Puzzle
2
3 4
18
2
25
26
27
128
₤29
A Division of on army
ACROSS
1 Value (8).
Fragrant oll (5).
Small pool (B).
D
1 Doctrine (5).
12 Scold (4).
10
13
14
DOWN
Candidate (8)
(A)
2 Soothing (B).
3 Condiment (4)
4 Guided (7).
3 Cautious (7)
10 Modem ald to navigation ef
13 Strongholds (5)
16 Sale
(0).
18 Barbarian (8)
20 At that point (5).
A1
22 Storage chamber (4)
za Girl's name (5).
25 Cut of meat (0)
26 German (0).
27 Exclude (3).
28 Offer in excuse (6)
29 Chief (0).
YESTERDAY'S
(0).
winery (5)
14 Opposed (8).
14
13 Sailing vessel (8)
10 Told tøles (7)
17 Splendid (7).
10 War feet (8)
21 Hostelry (5).
24 Withered (4).
CROSSWORD—Attom: 3 Lamp. 7 Burn, 6 Omen, D
Rak. 10 Defelt, 12 EBs, 15 sober, 18 Sews, 15 hony, 21 Trad. 23 Sped. 21 Holes, 2 Dyen, 20 Serials, 30 Paid, 31 Flea, 32 Pupil. 33 Rave. Down: Haven, 2 Bratard, 4 Trate, 5 Poke. 6 Peat. 8 fülm, 11 Cower, 13 Food, 14 Bay, 18 Hiper, 1 Stud, 38 Sage, 20 Blue, 22 let, 24 Ohler, 25 Plain, 27 Yolk, 28 Spar.
Ah yes.
So-called freaks are Jovely peuple. Mr Gresham
of heart-warming stories 10 tell.
struck
thinks knows lots of them and has lat, as I conclude the
tolerant than ordinary human beings. That is why he prefers the "carny" folk.
hope, and charity.
Oh, yes the carny world is a
And all that colour Bnd al! wonderful world all right. They those lights as well, give me
arch
there. autriples:-
LENO th
different language the fairground every time. Here are some prime
CON lu persuade a pers4751 to do something against his own terests after having won his confidence.
MITT CAMP. the furtune- Д fair- Leiling concession
ground
She hops about
EN be read by those who ke
conversation រង
GRAND Atemories MAN,
of Norman Nancy by
Cunera Douglas (Secker and Warburg, 25%.).
LOST
a serious fair to a mian, every moment of whose time during
hours 24 allotted.
men.
80
дге
He has oll wells in 14 states
form acres
that they estimated to $200,000,000.
IN
his chest,
10
·
(or
offers ■ girl
of
screen
and
school:
To Hollywood The boy friend or the mother- POPULAR magnates who 3 - D in-law may be responsible for
thought The latest estimate of
That the troubles.
were the answer to wealth $2,000,000,000.
"deeples" wildly years figure is undoubtedly
And this approach "paves the television's attractions como She was exaggerated, just like his annual way for what need only be a sorry news from Britain. this
chat with com- week. short, friendly a splendid Income-$50,000,000 a year.
Certainly In more conservative quarters monsenso advice”
in every Less than one happiest of it is believed he draws in
Once the
the
British cinemagoerH problem in presented hundred dollars clearly to more than $12,000,000
the
only the visite a 3-D show. And patient, a year.
patient can find his or her 176 of nearly 6,000 cinemas in notes out of the Iron Duke.
Mr Hunt, a handsome six solution, or alternative solu- Britain have thought it worth- "I understand we are to have
stone, hus tions may be offered from while to screen the "deeples," the hounds bore," he wrote to footer weighing 14
choose. ngo of 12, "which four sons and two daughters, Ho which the patient can her nt the
Up north, where Britons like is one of the fabulous group of
Anyway, the psychiatrist adds, their pleasures to be simple, may detain me for some hours,
people will Texas oil men who collectively even if the problem is insoluble, neliher 3-D nor wide
comprise the world's
richest it helps the patient to get it off has proved a financial success, not be satialed if 1 should not
Cinemagoers, it is sald, en- take a gallop with them."
joy a "deople" more as a novelty He makes a list of the virtues
When she asked him to sit and Canada and has such vasi HOW TO FIND What job than anything else. fairgrounds he found
on the
But they diallike paying extra while be wn researching for for his portrait to please ber.
be worth A HUSBAND the best for the special spectacles this book: Justice, prudence, he wrote:-
chance of finding husband? And wearing thom irksome, And fortitude; filth, temperance,
The answer-In Germany, any- they find 3-D is neither so re- An hour is the least that (an
Because the film way--is a job a zalogi! Taking nor so satisfying as the will in reality require artti)
"Roman Holl- behind the counter
any conventional screen. and for every hour of the | MEMORIAM
day" has jed
reasonably atting the sitter must reckon
shop successful (by way of film star Audrey preferably a department store. ROAD Nearly half the people upon three hours' interrup-
halestyle) to The bigger the better. This is Hepburn's occupation. This loss
driving licence in must be of the carliest hours thousands of Japanese girls en much the case that, realising SENSE who sought a motor their of 2% Britain last year failed of the day and those in cutting off their silken locks to that there is a surplus
fellow the Audrey fashion, million command which the
wemen in Germany at firet driving test, according to of light
This Japanese Buddhists are organise the moment, the smart German official figures. in the most perfect.
ing ceremonial services all over girls don't waste time studying The chief reasons, according the country "in memory" of the medicine or law, er learning to a leading motoring massacred locks
shorthand or typing.
lack of experience and theo Even beauty parlour opera-
Instead these girls queue for rotical training, including the tors in several cities have been any job which will take them Highway Code and theory of Secondary reason: Lucky, lucky Mrs 3. to inspire going along to their local te behind a counter, and are even mechanism.
ask "forgiveness" for But it is pics to when Mr having tortured and cut to death prepared to buy their way into the Jitter
a job which takes them behind Examiners despite occasional
criticism, so much glorious hair.
u counter selling men's goods.
seemed very fair. Thes memorial, or "Kuyo"
A survey
оп (oficial)
Wêre thia Sometimes the drivers services, are traditional
state of affairs comments: "It failed on points which aremed Japan and are held for dies that was discovered that a man is small, but which would never-
a friendly theless cause accidents, are swatted, mesquitoes that are more apt to make
Do department sprayed, food that is eaten and pass at a girl in
WOTTERS make even needies which have been store than on a street car. drivers than men? No, accord-
servicos Fow "Kuyo" broken.
The statistics soem to back ing to the school. But when a have however,
this up. Out of every hundred woman is bad she tends lớ ba In recent years, TO August book Bat is com- talked, "I like to toste my N
Gery very, very bad. plete without a thriller; and been so widespread as the mer brides married in West
fallen many today an average of 40 here is a jolly good one THE vices in memory of the
are former salesgirls. LOCK STRIKES THIRTEEN locks,
priests pro- Brinesaun, 10, Gd.) by Her-
world's the ride over the services in which SUBMARINE The MK Gresham knows hundreds
maddening, Inseinating book bert
kimonoed A traditionally
SANCTUARY first Mot wonderful things. All about
around him that reminds me of murder of a bacteriologlat call-
Wayland
wig) rd North
(in who has
heavy Don't midgets, rxample.
a plate of hors d'œuvres,
discoverext Hepburnised girl kace! side by has just been opened-in Spain, introduce several experimental confuse midgels with dwark, she hops about here and here (quite possibly
and Situated at La offering Incense
Falconera that will sido
de "changes" in the USS Hargali, Dwurts
nasty disease have please.
large picking an anecdote or a
Been very
Mediterrancan the whole human
prayers and burning joss sticks Garraf, on the
veteran of World War II. black knock out heads, buiging foreheads, curved as though they were 24
of the "departed" coast +
mlics Iow
from In memory
A "dinette" which doubles as voices. Midgela olive or a spines,
and, oddly sardine
thousands of Barcelona, the chapel has hair of so many
just a lounge is being installed consider themselves superior lu enough, this mothert
gives thi
been dedicated in a unique core- alm-minded Japanese giris.
quarters where the He lives on an Isiand that is dwarts.
have Midgels
sulin truth about Dougins far better
devold ulready keen
mony in which the officiating men can play cards and where of vegetation skins. shrifi voices,
in- than a formal biography.
a cave coffee and snacks will be avail- (thanks to his nasty, germ-laden | DONT
should get priest dived down into telligence, accurate memories.
and when
where he set up a statue of the ablo 24 hours a day. There will ty pe he dies goings-on)
WORRY
bo nickel-in-tho-slot he
surrounded by lab
patients to talk less Virgin Mary. and about their aches and pains and
chosen for the juke box with 100 records to assistants, lady secretaries,
choose
from. Iwo ace reporters.
more about their personal prob- chapel is one of the biggest of
the underwater caves lining A soundproof wall between
· sleeping -- and the Mediterrancan * Spoln's This advice is given
coast the lounge by reporters are only people who vex me. They leading London paychiatrist in Decorations inside the chapel quarters will enable the night work for one of those fabulous a report to the Royal Society are provided by natural under watch to slumber undisturbed. fictional American glossy of Medicine.
water flowers, while the statue For those who want to read in called Picture, and "Auxtous-type" equally faithful portrait, magazines
pallents, he mounted on a luminous base bed, there will be plug-in lights-
a na- over each bunk, generally highly has been installed in time of
a says, my when they get involved in
suffer mainly from tural crannie which exploring century real news story they don't take strung and
dizziness,
near stomach frogmen found
the on- LEFT Duke of pictures of anything or bother | headoches,
trance to the cave. pains and sleeplessness,
ON BUS common to file a story. Amazing.
RUNNING "STRONG" gaine that is secretly controlled in favour of the operator.
GRIND STORE
11
gaftie
in which "everybody plays and everybody wins," as the lickels cest tixpence and the prizes are stapebre a gross.
The midgets
fur
deep
And midgets are not unkind. vicious, mean, or nasty. No, sir.
Some midgets, like Charley Stration,
known professionally
us General Tom Thumb 4lns.), are very "mature."
(3(1
about him
muny
дв
Jot
books
such correspondence. Norman Douglas has inspire.l
to know that sort of literary cult. He has nice
died she married agalłu, almost hud
Oscar ust happily, an Irish baronet: written Wilde and the Brontes, Douglas Sir Richard Levinge. wus ü witty man, who made legends around himself in his lifetime-not through the excel- No, he is lence of his writing.
い why remembered by
the
friends, not eat them," he said.
And his vasteful friend Nancy Cunard has willen L inost
on rend Cunard Having Douglas I feel that I too have that ix met him. And surely the aim of all biography?
Age to youth
became
Stratton
but rich through real estate deals, 41 married another midget, Miss favorulte man in 10th Lavinia Warren (2ft.
the 8ins.). history:
first Wellington, hero and remained happy for years.
extremely A
N
this
of
VIGNETTES OF LIFE
- AND THEN HE ATE ANDTHER. SCALLION
AND CHASED ME ALL OVER THE PLACE TRYING TO KISS ME! IT WAS A SCREAM — HE ATE
THIS SCALLION
AND CHASED ME ALL OVER
THE PLACE TRYING TO
KISS ME
SOME PEOPLE ATTEMPT
3D SOUND-EFFECTS
BY REPETITION.
"TWO, PLEASE / “
TRY OUR GIANT HOT-DOGRAMA
EVERYTHING IS GOING
"RAMA' THESE DAYS.
YOU SHOULD SEE THEIR LIVINGROOM— SIXTY FEET — AND THEIR POOL- YOU COULD SAIL A BOAT IN IT-THEIR.
CAR IS A BLOCK
LONG-
I THINK I'LL
START TAKING- VITAMINS/"
race.
Holiday thriller
Brean
The two
3D Notes
THE ONES WHO SEE EVERYTHING.
IN 'WIDE-VISION" AND MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE A SARDINE — (REGULAR SIZE)
COR, 1964 BY GÉNÉRAL FEATURES CORP. TM-WORLD RIGHTS RESERVED,
"HA? YOU LOOK LIKE A
TRAFFIC LIGHT":{"
CONCETTIS
the
Shaven-hearted
lema.
41
are
Doctors "anxious
in
git!
and
BY HARRY
The cave
THAT'S NIAGARA FALLS —
BE CAREFUL YOU DON'T FALLIN /*
3D IS OLD STUFF
TO GRANDAD --
IN HIS DAY THEY HAD THE STEREOSCOPE.
COLOSSAL SEA EPIC
IN 3D
*ER-DO YOU HAVE SEASICK PILLS 7
يه
water
WEINERT
STRANGE FEELING AFTER SEEING A GIANT-SIZE
DOUBLE FEATURE.
FORLORN
ORIOM
JUKE BOX In an effort to FOR SUBS make the cramped quarters of a sub- under- marine
moro habllable (and chapel glamorous) the U.6, Navy la to
the crows
even
in
Among the 20,000 Items of property lets on Birmingham Corporation buses and never claimed was a wooden leg. The property is now being sold, and Includes wedding rings,
false teeth and gloves by the dozen, and umbreuss by the thousand,
One of the best bargains was obtained by a little girl who' paid threepence for a purse. Inside she found half a crown,
At Nottingham, nundreds of gloves left on city buses have been auctioned. Also I tho sale were 18 safety clips which women fix to their handbags to stop gloves getting lost
•
HARMONT Komanes amon
the oooed nearly KESTORED
turned the Dus- Dan Municipal Symphony into
tacophony.
Trouble was that the second ubce player fell in love with the third obce player. They got
married.
But
the
the municipal council doesn't permit husbanda and Wives to be jointly orchestra payTSIL Thereupon the second oboe player got her. notico.
No competent oboo player" were available to replace her, however, and she has been
nimd again.
SPORTING
OF HIM
When reporter Leopoldo Oberst O Cruzeiro of Monte.. video went to interview football star Obdulio Varela-dhe show was better than any · football match.
Obdulio said he wouldn't be Interviewed.
Leopoldo said he was going to sit on the doorstep until Obdullo came out-announcing he would stay, for. 120 hours iz nocomary.
With his back propped against. the door, ha sayod for 42 hours while crowd of several hundred - chourad. Eventually Obdulio gave in.
GOLDEN Now it's góld legs. LOOK-Mg for the girl AL
tle Paris fastlan show Jacques. Faih" introduced gold-thranded stockings and gartersatudded with, brillianti. Path "Agures, they're good: for BOTU
Especially the
VALL THE FUNTENTO
[GOOD TIMES V FOR ALLDEL
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