1951-03-21 — Page 4

THE CHINA MAIL, WEDNESDAY, MARCH 21, 1951..

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FLY WITH THE LEADER-GO BY KURPIR

"I remember elderly ladies 00

or 70 years ago who sald 'yaller

for yellow, gould for gold. 'Vawse for vase 'braslet' for bracelet, 'chainey' fur china, and 'cawfee for coffee. Girls were called 'gella' and, of course, there

huntin' an' shootin

o

WRE

Letter to The Times,

"Although t consider myself my boy friends are attractive. Juki boy friends and nothing

letter. more." Frons another NOT to The Times.

W

THEN grandma wore, in days gone by Her brasslets made of gould Her crinoline her ankles hid

From Icering glances

bould;

Huntin' fellers got too fresh Or made unwelcome pawses Then grandmamina would ring

the bell

For Mary Jane, the servant goll

To dust the chaincy vawses.

At supper time, in candle light

In crinoline of yaller,

Dear grandma gave the coup de

grace

To foller after feller;

When lovers tried to meit ber

heart

As brittle hard as tawfee, Then grandmamma would ring

the bell

For Mary Jane, the servant gell To bring the port and cawfee.

If stratagem could not delay

With cawfee or with vawses Advances of a bolder swain

Who made more urgent

pawsos.

Dear grandmamma was not dis-

mayod

(There's nothing you could tell

'er) Resourceful,

mamma

heartless grand-

Would send the maid for dear

papa

Fence....

NATHANIEL GUBBING

In my experience, the human mind is not capable of thinking of more than one woman al a time.

Mine 4, doctor.

your

Then I can only say mind needs drastic treatment. What sort of women?

Fat women, doctor.

This is worse than ever. One can only call it the perversion an ideal. What are these women doing?

of

Slimming, doctor.

Ah, I see. The idealist, dis- gusted by ugliness, forming 20,- 000 mind images of beauty. How are your brain children nequir- ing form and grace?

to

the

A

Women

Why mud, Mr Gubbins?

Only mad

would spend their morning search ing shops for food, and their evening learning how not to cat it.

Fan mail

NOTHER letter

from

WHAT S EGO NAGDAN

GONAGOAN!

by EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE

LONDON.

It is doubtful whether mother and son could have lived to- THE KING is now con- gether for long. Though they valescent after spend- were everything to each other, ing more than a weak their characters were different in bed - with a "feverish his quiet and sensitive, hers

robust as a gale of wind. chill."

ed the whole world wanted

so wanted choirs

There has been much

con-

to

She

sing

cern in the country over this everywhere, the bigger the bet- ter, the more the merrier. Sho irness Tho stay in bod has led them to the ends of the been more prolonged than one earth. She believed they would would expect for the treatment bring pener to ♫ war-crazy of an ordinary chill, and the world. doctors-five of them, headed

by homœopathic expert Bir Monty's star turn

John Welt-have

occasionally

called twice in a day. This, too, ВестМа to indicate quito

severe attack.

FIELD. MARSHAL LORD MONTGOMERY has set many Aunorthodox fashions in milltary

nitive. But I am assured that during

Somo days ago ค colour this time the King has kept on photograph of him was publish-

working.

ed which has really shaken the

Imana From his bedroom on the purists, It shows him

Servico dress, with firat floor the King looks out culate in over the garden and lake, and ten dazzling rows of medal rib- has a view of the traffic along bons, Constitution Hil At his side But he's gos the order wrong. are three bell pushes and two Those three basic symbols of telephones,

Kalser war service, familiarly One bell connects with his known as Pip, Squeak and

this is Wilfred, have got out of step. (or British) people. But most of personal servant: them do not appear to belleve King's Page," who brings

The field-marshal's tallar has fetches book: that doggies are our best friends. meals,

when y are

of the three, instead of first,

With honours

One recalls that savage dog-papers, and tells the vest and put the 1914 (Mons) Star Last

other servants gies have destroyed more than wanted. 1,000 sheep in the past twelve months, which is hardly friendly thing to do during an acute shortage of meat.

д

Another reminds me that xloggles have been responsible for thousands of street neeldents. Not so friendly, either,

оге

A second beli rings in the equerry's room. There is always an aide on duty, ready to carry cut personal commis Bions.

LORD STANLEY OF ALDER. LEY, who became engaged recently to Mile. Therese Hus. son, is a considerable sailor and yachtsman. He should not, in. The third bell is for the pri- tatare, have any difficultles with vate

calculations. For two assistants, with whom, slim,

attractive Mile. morning and evening, the King Husson is, surprisingly, a higher discusses latest political deve- mathematician of great ability. lopments, changes in world At the Sorbonne she galloped affairs, and reports from British through a five-year course on out with the subject, passing ambassadors.

years highest honours in two under par.

secretary, or one of his d

From my own reading of the news I and that doggies also neglecting their dutics the towards us. The recent case of The two telephones connect reader who has written in a house dag who slept while the Kint with the outside She has been in Britain some for twenty years to say how burglars stole jewels under his world. One is fitted with a

months and planned to take a much he hates this column and snoring nose, is only one of "scrambler apparatus ensuring

job as a "slide rule wizard" in always addresses me as "Dear many.

complete privacy in conversa- the drawing office of a Midlands Pig."

This lethargy among doggies | tion.

aircraft factory. may be due to diet deficiency, or Queen Mary and Princess But from now on her mathe- lack of bones, though I believe

matical genius will be entirely the true friends of man have Elizabeth ring up often.

of 44-year-old at the disposal turned against us in our hour of

Meals

come up at axed Lord Stanley. need.

times: breakfast at 8.15, lunch, at one o'clock, tea at four, and supper soon after 8. The Queen

Dear Pig.

You was worse than ever last werk. I see you are still attack- ing the ladies and merring at dogs what are man's best friend. You are nothing but a dirty Communist.

Italy's best

Instead of friendship. glowing brightest in adversity, our four- and Princess Margaret often MANY PEOPLE are wonder- legged pals have begun to hate

Join him for tea, and the ing about the appointment of an food. us now we are short of

whon Queen,

arrangements Italion admiral-Count Ferrante they are

Capponito. be. ад assistant In their sullen rage

General attacking our livestock, allowing permit, for supper.

Jovial, white-moustached Bir Chief of Staff under burglars to steal our valuables

Elsenhower. and organising car smashes, It John Weir calls at ten every The Italian Navy has some- won't be long before they help morning and again, if neces thing to live down, but no man As I am aware, from previous burglars to steal our property sary, at 7. The King is always correspondence, that you believe, and push us under buses.

- According

papers, 20,000 fat women have writ-

Well, dear Pig. I am not a ten to the B.B.C. asking for a new alimming diet on the Communist, though I must admit evening television programme. to being rather dirty, owing to the fuel shortage and the price How does this concern you?

of electricity. I'm frightened, doctor, Frightened of 20,000 fat wo-

men?

I think they're not only fat but mad, too. Think of 20,000 women at large, all fat and raving mad.

all true Englishmen are devoted to dogs, may I point out the love

Looking forward to your next of dogs among the English is letter, dear Pig, not as widespread as you think? The majority or the letters reaching me are from English

Ever Yours, -London Express Service)

IT

DOCTORS' DISEASE (KILLE

SETS DOCTORS ARGUING

by a Medical Officer of Health

MONG the serious diseases which have become more common in this century, coronary thrombosis (a form of heart attack) is the one which most in And say "This feller's yaller."terests doctors, for they themselves die of it more often

than any other group in the community..

If the expected rate of death from this cause, cal

full

In modern times the world is culated for the total male population, is taken to be 100, the rate for doctora has been worked out as 868, for judges and members of the legal profession 227, for coal miners 40, for agricultural workers 82.

01 unprotected gells

Whose awains contemptuous and

free,

Are more like dear old pells; Their glance at naked limbs dis-

played

Is casual and could, But grandmamma, a clever gel Affronted, rang the parlour

bell-

And rang the wedding bell as

well

To wed a heart of gould.

Mind over matter”

"Relaxation therapist relleves nervous hyper-tension... fall gue."--Advertisement,

of

Nearly 50,000 men

die and. women coronary disease cach yeat.

་

abock

Mother and son THE DEATH of Ivor Novello has brought back memories of his mother-Mime, Clara Novello Davies.

pleased to see him, enjoys his could have a better recommen- than to be an Italian of amusing dation

adiniral and to be universally endless stories.

by the admired, particularly Royal Navy. Such is Capponi.

Britain is his second country. British ties

are strong-a The th mother and wife, and many years as naval at- spent in London Lache before the war-It was a hard decision which he had to Many reports have said that make in 1940, when he was re- she shared his Aldwych fat called for active service for his until she died in 1943, In fact country against his friends. she had a comfortable flat of

After the armistice of Sep-

her own in Brook House, Park tember 1843 he turned against Lane, where she is remembered Musalial, fighting with the par- Kotting and eventually ..tisans as a "very, very good dady."

through to Allled headquarters, Remembered, too;

the where

liaison he served as the arteries of the heart and echoes of music and song which officer.

recently, came from her rooms, She was other organs.

aro

Moro

ава

rear-

pt

Only a few years ago opera- a fine planist, as well as a sing admiral, he has been command-

ing the Naval Academy slons

were being devised to cr, and she was in the habit of

through running

Rimsky- Leghorn. It has become some- the blood supply of improve hearts damaged by coronary Korsakov's "Flight of the Bum- thing of a model for the rest of the the world, and a favourite visit- thrombosis, but progress in this ble Bre" first thing in

ing place for the Royal Navy. direction appears to have ceased morning. for the time being.

The tragedy of coronary thrombosis is that it often strikes down successful men at the peak of their career.

CORONARY. THROMBOSIS

© it kilis 50,000 people a year

strikes hardest at the successful

But

its CAUSE, may lie in a fear of failure.

to return

In

middle-age it is five

times more common In men than in women.

Shortly before, his death last year, Pro- fessor John Ryle of Oxford, himself à

victim

of coronary thrombosis, pointed out

no

Why the disease now attacks more people and particularly why It seems to strike with greater venom those

In the British Heart whose work entails

rather than physical Incidentally, smoking, which Journal how rapidly this disenso mental

are was at one time thought to pre-appeared to be on the Increase. strain-are points which

for tiris being hotly debated in The cipitate the clotting of blood in in seeking the reason Lanert

the arteries of the heart, is now he emphasised the importance of Coronary thrombosis is caused regarded as relatively harmicas, social and occupational changes: In forty percent of the patients B: under by a

Coronary thrombosis a narrowing of the diameter

noted care had bf

the

main blood vessels serious condition: about one in under

ar emotional strain. (coronary arteries) of the heart. ten of first attacks are imme- heavy mental or

fatal.

But

there is It may be of course that the Eventually the blood cannot pass. diately along the narrowed channel and brighter alde. Modern methods professional classes are more forms a clot (thrombus) in the of diagnosis and treatment have susceptible to this disease than even manual workers, not because artery. The result Is that the helped many sufferers, heart muscle a large part of it those who have been most thar overtax their brains, but to because their occupations are in a severe attack or only a small desperately in,

sedentary. part in a slighter attacks cut useful life for many years. blood on which the efficiency of with a curated at Patent Whip, Of Ambition

a suspected heart attack!* the punming mechanism depends. will recognise, coronary throm NEVERTHELESS there is per- Close your eyes and fold your Smoking?, Harmless bola from the severe and dis- haps something in the theory treasing pain in the chest of et an American paychiatrist who UST why the diameter of the which the patient complains and believes that susceptibility to

arteries of

of the heart should the signs of collapse or shock, coronary thrombosis is related Yes, doctor.

be specially susceptible to this Often there have been warning fear of failure, with a consequent symptoms during the previous perpetual straining to catch up Now keep your mind a comparrowing process is not known.

It belleved to have some few hours or treatment is only half realled even in those with ambitions which may be plote blank until I ask you what

The preliminary you're thinking about. Then tell thing to do with the breaking

the chemical to enture absolute rest and quiet-at- the top of their particular me the first thing that comes down of fat in

factory inside the human body, ness and to ease distress with troe into your bead. Got that?

Possibly the body has to · FEDEL though this is not to say that infections of painkilling drugs.

thrombosis has any When the patient recovers in some way against the almost coronary. connection whatever with diet from the immediate ill-effects of intuleable mental efforts of or obesity. But he occurrence in muckden damage to the heart those who are co

constrained, many cares curtainly does seem enuade be may be considered a perhaps by

their hereditary

JUST relax on the sofa. Mr Gubbins Comfortable?

Yes, doctor..

hands.

Yes, doctor.

What are you thinking about? Twenty thousand women,

Great heavens, Mr Gubbins

doctor

off from the essential supply of

O very

to

to depend on heredity, jede multable case for treatment with make-up, to ride over forward the on the surging wave of success The late

the King's physiclaby, found

tir: Maurico. Cassidio-valier Edilcoumoral, ·

anticoagulant drugi, to somn unattainable shore. famly history of the disses in Thero Farok given to prevent de World Copyright Bertruiden bat bila patientay lig

~further, wlossing of die blond linear

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