THE CHINA MAIL FRIDAY SUPPLEMENT, FEBRUARY 18, 1938
CABBAGES AND KINGS
N actor decided to give up
his career and become a
doctor.
In a short while he was achiev- ing a great deal of success.
One day he was operating for appendicitis, and, as usual, the operating theatre was filled with students taking hints.
The operation was so success- fully performed that, at the end, the students-broke into loud ap- plause.
Then the old actor spirit re- after turned, and the surgeon, bowing his appreciation, hurried back-and removed the patient's tonsils as an encore.
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Obvious
Then there was the woman who told her milliner that she couldn't possibly have that hat because it looked too much like a hat.
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Change
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A wireless speaker said that explorers should have no ties. I suppose they usually wear muf- flers.
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Song For The Modish Girl
Red Nails in the Sunset,"
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Solved
A new machine can tell whe- ther or not a man is lying. I must have married one.
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Hopeless
Russian scientist. has suc- ceeded in making fish answer the telephone. If only he could make my office boy do the same.
Dirty
An astrologer has counted ninety-five sunspots. I can only suggest they send the sun to the cleaners.
SOFT ANSWER
would never
"A clever man think of being rude to his wife."
"Most clever men haven't got wives."
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Hobbies Corner
How to make a broomstick dip it in gum.
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Case For The S.P.C.A. A dance band played in a cage with two lions. The animals are doing as well as can be expected.
Quite
Dentists, say a writer, need nerves of iron. Judging by the bills they send out, they've got 'em.
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Cause And Effect
A beggar who appeared in a police court was said to own, a motor-car. It is not surprising that he is a beggar.
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Unbalanced
"Modern men have less dignity than those of an older genera- tion," notes a social observer.
There's nothing like the poise of the old brigade.
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Proving The Proverb "It takes a clever man to be a convincing story-teller," declares a woman.
Which only goes to prove that dud men tell no tales.
Relief
"I say, old man, I want ten pounds badly, and I haven't the faintest idea where I can get it.”
"Thank heaven for that!”
Lasting
Modern wedding rings, I read, are much lighter than the old ones. The old ones, of course, were supposed to last a lifetime.
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Bull's Eye
There was a domestic fight. "I've given you the best years of my life," she said.
"Good heavens!" he replied. "Were these your best?"
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Joke For The Holidays
The schoolroom was draughty, and little Willie was always catching cold. His mother wrote to the teacher: "Dear teacher. will you please let Willie sit in a place that is not draughty in school?"
The teacher replied: "Dear madam, when I find a place in school that is not draughty, I'm going to sit in it."
NATURE NOTE
"GOOD
Humans are superior to animals because man is equipped with a complicated mechanism for thinking so.
The Mailed Fist
An advertisement offers a cor- respondence course in boxing.
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Thoughtless
The builder who built a prison
wall to scale.
Spirit Version
Distilled waters don't run cheap.
VALUABLE GIFT OFFER
By collecting the labels (not outer wrappers) of your Cadbury's BOURN- VITA tins, you can obtain the beauti» ful Wedgwood Ware articles, here illus- trated, free of charge.
The number of labels required in exchange is as follows:-
Wedgwood Cup & Saucer
2 labels from 1 lb. tins or 4
1⁄2 lb.
Wedgwood Jug
6 labels from. 1 lb. tins or-12
Start collecting your labels to day and as soon as you have sufficient to qualify for these gifts apply to
JOHN D. HUTCHISON & CO.,
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Cadbury's
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