1937-04-15 — Page 11

THE CHINA MAIL, APRIL 15, 1937.

Henry Harris has bad news

They will tell you they're in love. But it's just desire — or self-conceit.

They are love-cripples, says a Psychologist în this article.

1 IN 5 CAN'T FALL IN LOVE!

are foolish if you take it for more than it's worth; if you mistake it for love,

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TOT all that flutters in the heart is Love. I've known men and women who fancied themselves deep- ly, crazily, in love. Like the great It comes from intense and healthy lovers in history

and literature. physical desire. It makes you over- Like Romeo and Juliet. Abelard value the object of your desires. You judge by the intensity of your

and Heloise.

Ivan is not very successful with Only in love could she vanquish his job. He falls in love at first men easily. And so she had many sight with a girl in the street. He love affairs. woos her ardently, marries her with- in three weeks, deserts her within three months.

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She will tell you she has been a martyr to Love.

The truth is she has been £ martyr to her vanity, to her sense Ivan's later history is sad. He of inferiority where men are con- But in the bottom of their hearts desires and not by the merits of grows a Christlike beard, announces cerned, to the vicious circle of try- there was anything but love. Self- your beloved.

he has a mission to reform the ing to get her own back on the conceit maybe. Physical infatuation Love is more than that. Desire world, is not accepted at his own whole, masculine sex. perhaps. A momentary delusion, is the sap of the tree-Love is the valuation, and within a year is asy-

But not Love.

. blossom.

lum-bound.

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Desire may be blind, but love is Too many men and women in this certainly not. It is the very an- stressful haphazardly civilised world tithesis of blindness. cannot fall in love. They are love It is the desire and the ability to cripples. At least one in five, I see someone as he is. To under- should say.

stand him as he is. To help him as he is.

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You think that I exaggerate. Well, have a look at some of the people who think themselves in love.

Now that is a gruesome and ex- treme example of something that happens daily. Ivan felt inferior. Wanted to show he was a real man. To assert his virility.

Love would do that! Marriage would do that! So he thought. But what he called Love was Self-love.

The beard was another despair- ing attempt to assert, his manhood. But even that failed.

All these men and women will tell you they were in love. Doubt them if you dare.

But what do you think? What then is Love?

"Let's use common sense-along with a little psychology--to get our bearings.

Love is the ability and the de- sire to understand and identify our- selves with someone else. To see with their eyes, hear with their ears, feel with their heart.

They may have read books on sex. They may know how to "make" Marriage may be a lottery if it love. As if love could be "made." is founded on Desire, but not if it

They may even have a useful line is founded on Love. in seductive charm. In the art of Flattery sweeps Joan off her feet, fooling the other

sex. Seeming She imagines she is in love with a Every day men and women pitch- To make demands as well as to what they are not. "Selling" what man. Actually, she is in love with fork themselves into love and mar- fulfil them. To feel neither un- they have not got.

the reflection of herself mirrored in riage because they have a profound worthy nor too worthy. But they are completely unable to his eyes. When that reflection dies, sense of inferiority. Because they You can love deeply without feel- fall in love.

what she calls love dies with it. feel the need to impress the world ing that your beloved is great in That is Vanity, not Love. Self- by possessing and dominating some- intellect, outstanding in beauty, sur- love if you like.

one who is much admired by others. passing in charm, of unusual If she is not made aware of this These are the people who become strength of character. she will crave more and more a possessive, jqalous, inconsiderate. Admiration is not necessary. Only John and Mary have fallen in diet of continuous adoration and Naturally.

sympathy. And an understanding love on the decks of a luxury crui- flattery. And that sort of diet fat- At rock bottom they cannot love that grows..

They do not realise that men tens the Divorce Lists.

and they are unsure of themselves. and women, idling at sea under a Margaret has got her idea of Love But they are mightily concerned Love grows with balmy subtropical sky, will feel and from books.

experiences Of the wrong sort. about their own opinion of them shared. do the most amazing things.

They tell her that Love is Ro- selves.

That is why the capacity for Love They marry, knowing nothing of mance. And Romance consists of

if it is each other. In three months she being adored from a high pedestal.

t is there grows with age. Phyllis has had many lovers and If it is not there, growing old re- flies to her mother. He hopes she Naturally, she falls in love-not now she is on divorcing terms with veals the emptiness. will stay there.

with a man-but with the idea of her third husband. A beautiful and That is where Love has it ove Infatuation is delightful, deli- being loved. Romantically. Accord- successful professional woman, she Desire. Love can grow-Desire can- cious. Delirious and devastating. ing to the fairy tales.

has had to struggle hard to com- not. Gloriously intoxicating. You are But as the idea bears no relation pete with men in their own field Ask yourself this. young-whatever your age-so long to real life, she is doomed to a rude before she could achieve what suc- Are you really capable of loving? as you can experience it.

awakening.

Or are you just fond of yourself?

ser.

But you

cess she did.

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STRIKE INFECTION

INFECTION SPREADS

BUILDING STRIKE plants if the Canadian automobile

IN DUBLIN

Dublin, To-day.

dispute is not settled.

Otherwise, Mr. Hall threatens to call a mass meeting of employees A general building strike by of the Oshawa plant of General 10,000 men was begun yesterday Motors and inform them they are morning when brick-layers, masons being fooled and that the Union is and workers connected with the not “playing the game" with them. building trade, downed tools.

-Reuter.

The strikers are demanding high- er wages and shorter hours.

The building trade in Cork was also paralysed by a sympathetic strike by 1,300 workers.--Reuter.

BUS CONDUCTORS

IN KENT

LINER CREW ON "SIT-DOWN”

Another R.A.F. Fatality

London, To-day. The number of fatal accidents in the Royal Air Force since January was increased to 21- yesterday when a fighter plane crashed in Hertfordshire.

The pilot was killed instantly. So far this year, 33 members of the R.A.F. have been killed. in flying accidents.-Trans- Ocean.

CABINET

New York, To-day. Two hundred and fifty passengers for Europe were delayed yesterday when the liner "President Roose- velt" failed to sail at noon owing to a sit-down strike by the crew.

The men refused to sign articles RESIGNATION A lightning unofficial strike of unless the Line rejected nine en- bus conductors and drivers began gine-room replacements to which yesterday morning in Kent in the the seamen objected because they towns, of Tunbridge Wells, Folke-alleged they had not supported the stone and Maidstone...

recent strike.-Reuter.

London, To-day.

The men's union met yesterday afternoon to discuss the situation. -Reuter.

SAUCE FOR

GANDER

THE

CRUISER WORKERS

St. Nazaire, To-day. Three hundred workmen on the new cruiser Georges Leygues have struck work for an increase in wages.-Reuter.

Oshawa (Ontario), To-day. The Mayor of Oshawa, Mr. Alex Hall, has telegraphed to Mr. Homer Great Britain has requested M. Martin, the American labour chief, Avenol, Secretary-General of the demanding that a strike be called League, to convene a special meeting of the Assembly for the admission of on Monday in United States motor Egypt to the League.

Toronto, To-day. Mr. David Croll, the On- tario Minister of Labour, and Mr. Arthur Roebuck, the Attorney-General, have re- signed from the Cabinet.

The Provincial Premier, Mr. Mitchell Hepburn, de- manded their resignations owing to differences over the attitude of the Administra- tion to the General Motors strike at Oshawa.

Meanwhile, in Ottawa, the Canadian Premier, Mr. Mac- kenzie King, stated yester- day that the Dominion Gov-

RUBBER STRIKE DEPORTATIONS

Questions In House Of Commons

EXPULSION FOR

VIOLENCE

London, To này.

An echo of the recent strike of tappers on rubber estates in Selan- gor and Negri Sembilan was heard in the House of Commons yester- day when Mr. J. H. Parker, Labour Member for Romford, asked under what authority the organisers the strike had been banished from Selangor.

Of

Mr. Ormsby-Gore, Secretary for the Colonies, replied that labour unions were legal in the Malay States.

He was not aware of any cases of expulsion simply in respect of the organisation of strikes, but some- expulsions had been ordered where industrial disputes were misused for the purpose of incitement to violence and disorder. Reuter.

ernment had no intention of intervening in the General Motors dispute unless there was reason to hope that such intervention would be of value. Reuter.