1926-10-23 — Page 11

TULAUSSERMAIS

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 23, 1926.

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STRAIGHT EIGHT

AUBURN

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5

ATT JA IN

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ENGINEERS and SHIPBUILDERS, BOJLER MAKERS, BRASS and IRON. FOUNDERS. AB work done in this veinbachment is guaranteed. We have over thirty years' experience. We own a Slipways and "can seconomodule any craft of 200 feet long.

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Tel. Kowloon Mo, 0. Estimates furnished on appilentino,

Hongkong, April 1, 1924.

#

Solė

Agents:

MITSUI

BUSSAN

KAISHA

HALË ATIÓTURBÆSEGUIRE

ASAHI

BEER

TIT-BITS.

THE KISS.

THE CHINA MAIL.

Kissing on the mouth may have come to the Hebrews from the Persiars, who, says Herodotus, when of equal rank, kiss one an other on the mouth, the inferior, only using the check, or prostru-

tion to kiss the, feet. The holy kiss as a method of salutation was in practice among, the early Christians, and caused no sur- prise in Rome, while it appeared strange to the Greeks. When Dio Chrysostom recognised and kiss- ed Sotades and another friend, he noted that the people laughed loudly at my kissing "them. Then I knew that in the cities they do not kiss each other." An Elizá- bethan declares that a kiss "tastes wondrous well, and full o' It is to the writers the grape."

of that age that we have, to go for the finest kisses in literature-- Marlowe passioning over the kiss af Faust to Helen, or, Othello dying with a last word of his kiss to Desdemona,

WHICH IS YOURS?

SEIGMUNDIS'S PAGE.

4

WHY? WHAT? WHEN? Y

MILK MAKES US GROW.

1:

When is a fish a bird?-When It is amusing to be told, as if it

it takes a fly..

were a great discovery, that milk When is a boy not a boy?-makes boys and girls grow. Of When he's a regular-brick. course it does!" Nature knew What dish would a sleepy bird what she was about when she pro-

prefer?A perch.

vided animals with milk for thei Why are teeth like verbe 7-nourishment of their young,

Because they are regular, Some new experiments show irregular, and often defect-that boys given plenty of milk tive.

beat other boys in size" and weight. Of course! We are also told that chickens, dogs, and piga thrive on a milk ration.

When is a candle in a passion? -When it flares up and is put out,

What made the cake walk?

How much money is wasted an. Seeing the biscuit box.

nually in the pathetic belief that Why is a house like the sun?-chemical manufacturers can make

Because, it has beams.

patent. foods of marvellous, nutri- When does a cook break the tive quality! How many millions law?When she poaches of people cherish. the idea that food can be concentrated in small eggs. What fruit grows on telegraph bulk or made into tabloide! The poles? Electric currants truth is that there is only one per- (currents), **

(fect food for mammals, and that' Why does opening a letter re-fis milk. It contains everything semble a strange way of the baby needs. What, then, is entering a room? Because milk made of?" Analysis shows it is breaking through the that every hundred parts of cow's ceiling. (sealing).

milk is made up as follows; water, What is the largest room" in the 187 parts; butter fat, nearly 4

world? The room for im- parts; albuminoids, 3% perta;| provement.

milk-sugar, 44 parts; the re- "Why is 'e' the most unfortun-mainder being mineral matter. "ate of letters?-Because it Milk also contains those wonder- is never in cash, always in ful organic substances known as debt, and never out of vitamins, which are not properly danger.

understood, but play an important part in nutrition: All these things taken together, form a perfect diet, and anyone could live on milk alone..

An

TOO BADI

As for magazines, sailors should take to "The Atlantic," clock-makers to "The Dial;" tired people to "Outing," and Bolshe- vists to "The Red "Book." Librarians should appreciate "The

Irish soldier serving in Bookman," young wives Good India so disliked the climate that Housekeeping," pugilista he decided to make an effort to "Punch," and workers in ebony get sent home. "Blackwoods." Prisoners natur- With this in view, he complain- ally went Liberty, contrevered to the doctor that his eyesight sialists "The Forum," patriotie was bad.. folks "The American." devourers "How can you prove that to

me asked the doctor. 231 of books "The Literary Digest,"

Pat: and all of us "Everybody's

"Well, doc," do you see that nail on the wall?" (from the "Boston Transcript.")

"Yes," replied the doctor. "Well, I don't.""

OBEYING ORDERS.

Judge: "Prisoner, did you steal that rug?"

Prisoner: "No, yer Honour. A lady gave it to me and told me to beat it, and I did."

NO INCENTIVE.

Employer: "Sam, I hear you and, Rastus, almost had a fight."

Sam Yassah, boss, we all would ja" had a terrible fracas, only they wasn't nobody there to hold us apart."

more

CHILLS AND FEVER.

Foreman: "Now, Murphy, what about carrying some bricks?".

Murphy: "I ain't feelin' well, guvinor; I'm tremben' all over.

Foreman: "Well, then, get busy with the sieve."

D

THE MASCULINE PROTEST.

**

Mother was talking to Willie. "Of course, Willie, you will have your hair cut."

"No, Ma, I won't It's too feminine."

MASTERPIECE OF PROSE.

Be substantially great in thy self, and more than thou appear- est unto others; and let the World' be deceived in thee; as they are in the Lights of Heaven Hang early plummets' upon the heels of Pride, and let. Ambition have but' an Epicycle and narrow circuit in, thee. Measure not thy self by thy morning shadow, but by the extent of thy grave; and Reckon thy self above the Earth by the line thou must be contented with under it. Spread not into bound- less Expansions either of designs · or desires. Think not that man- kind liveth but for a few, and that the rest are born but to serve those Ambitions, which make but flies of Men and wilder- nesses of whole Nations. Swell- Enot into vehement actions which imbroil and confound the Earth; but be one of those violent ones which force the Kingdom of Heaven If thou must meeda rule, be Zeno's King, and enjoy that Empire which, every Man gives himself. He who is thus his own Monarch contentedly sways the Sceptre of himself, not envying the Glory of Crowned Heads and Elohims of the Earth. Sir Thomas Browne (1605-82).

PAGE MUSSOLINI,; 5

Earnest Reporter Crushing into the public library ind want the life of Caesar A

Librarian: ”“”“Sorry" but Brutus beat you to it.

AP-PAUL-INGE

There was a young fellow

named Paul 'Who went

to a fancy dress ball;

They say, just for fun,

THE RIF NAPOLEON.

Abdul Kim, the defeated and captive leader of the Rif tribas- men, has arrived in his new pri son-home of Réunion, where he will presumably pass the rest of his life, with his household and several relatives, His property has been confiscated and he will be dependent on his captors for the wherewithal for his new way of life. He has expressed his confidence in their justice and goodwill, and it is unlikely that his confidence will prove mis- placed

The French Government want to keep him under their hand, and

to make sure that he will never make further trouble, and we may be sure that this Morocco Napo- And was "ate" by a dog in the leon will not return from his Elba,

He dressed like a bun,

hall

A CLEVER ONE.

There was an old lady of Kent, Who travelled, wherever she

went;

She moved when she walked, And she spoke when she

talked,

Plenty of Room.

What sort of place, then, is this Réunion Laland in the middle of the Indian Ocean? To begin with, there is plenty of room to walk about in it, for it is 40 miles long and 32 miles broad, with an area of 965 square miles. Being an island, it has a reasonably com- fortable temperature; though only 20 degrees south of the Equator.

On the windward side the tem-1 And whenever she stooped sheperature varies from 73 degrees

was bent,

in winter to 78 degrees in sum- mer, but the rainfall is very heavy, reaching: 160: inches a year in some places. On the lee-- ward side there are only 50 min- utes of rain, but the temperature is higher. The sea is seldom calm during the day, but the evenings are reposeful till the night wind begins to blow. Now and then, however, the island is visited by! terrible cyclones, which on one occasion destroyed half the sugar plantations.

“WASP-WAISTS."

A shaped poem is really quite an easy and amusing task after all. The following is an Ameri- can's attempt to kill the then pre- valling fashion of "wasp-waists":

This

is the. shape of

a woman's waist

on which a corset tight

is laced. The ribs, deformed by being squeezed, press on the lungs till they're

diseased. The heart":

is jammed and cannot pump, the liver

is

tor::

pid lump:

the stomach; crushed, cannot

digest, and in a mess are all compressed. There fore this silly wornan grows to be a beautiful mass of woes, but thinks she has a lovely shape, though hideous as a crippled ape. This Is

a woman'a -natural waist, which corset: never yet disgraced. Inside it

Outside

is a mine of health.

of charts it has a wealth.

It is a thing of beauty.

true, and a sweet joy for ever new. It needs no artfal padding-vile,

or bustle big to m give it "style It's strong and soli plump and sound, and hard to get one arm. aroudil. Alki in women.

LL

An Island of Mountains, " The mountains of Réunion should make their priauner feel at: home, for the island is almost all mountains. The towns and vil lages are built on a small belt of alltivial plains, from : 'which an sscent of 2,000 to 4,000 feet brings the climber to an inner green belt covered with Bugár: plantations and country houses, whose gardens are a magnificent glow of colour. Above these, again, are the forests; then plateaus where European veget- ables can be cultivated, and above these a mighty central mass of volcanic mountains, culminating in the extinct crater of the Pit of the Snows, 10,000 feet high, and "the still active Pit of the Fur nace, hardly two thousand feet lower, she #

But if the mountains will have a familiar look there will be little to remind the prisoner of his old tribesmen in the gentle and amfable Creole population (about) 170,000), descendanta of the original French colonists and their Malagasy wives! They are people prond of their French citizenship, electing represents- tives to the Chamber and Senate in Paris.

1. What letter in the alphabet le used to make a shoe?-Z, because It is the last w

Why are milestones like Apple pips Because they are never found in pairs (pears).

THEN

HONGKONG

11

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SET OF 20' COPIES $1.50

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